DimSumDolly* - the different morsels of the life of a foodie

Bowl Vs Plate

I had a colleague and an ex-colleague over for dinner last Friday and realised one major difference between Hong Kongers and Singaporeans.

I had made a pork stew to be eaten with rice and I had taken out three plates to put the rice on plus forks and spoons as cutlery. But I found that they didn't want to use the plates, forks and spoons and asked me for bowls and chopsticks instead. I hadn't even thought I might be asked for them even though I did have bowls and chopsticks available (nice ones I bought from Muji by the way).

At home in Singapore I usually eat out of a plate using forks and spoons and that seems to be the case in most Singaporean homes, hawker centres and food courts. And when I had my Singaporean friends over for dinner we all used plates, forks and spoons. No one thought it was anything out of the ordinary.

For my Hong Kong friends, though, it was something they weren't used to and I think something so small can also show the fact that Hong Kongers are generally more Chinese compared to Singaporeans who are more Westernised.

Wednesday Ramblings

Since I have nothing much to do at work at the moment, I thought I'd use the time to blog. Lately I've been trying to write a little more in Chinese, hence the previous entry (just for practice). Often the writing's inspired by something I had read in a tweet posted by some Chinese celebrity over at Weibo. And sometimes it's just easier to follow that train of thought in Chinese. To write it in English would cause the thought to lose its flavour. Such is the case with language where some thoughts just aren't translated well. When translated, the tone and content just makes it sound somewhat dumb.

Anyway, in some random musings, I read a newspaper article and learnt the Chinese name for bungee jumping. The article reported about an Australian tourist's botch bungee jump in Zambezi River at Victoria Falls. Miraculously she survived after her rope snapped - she had jumped from a height of 111m into the river.

The Chinese name for bungee jump is 笨猪跳 [pronounced: bern-choo-tiao]. It's a translation based more on the similarity of how it sounds to 'bungee' than what it means. But if you're interested, Wikipedia writes:

"The word 'bungee' originates from West Country dialect of English language, meaning 'Anything thick and squat', as defined by James Jennings in his book Observations of Some of the Dialects in The West of England published 1825."

The literal translation 笨猪跳, however, is "stupid pig jumps". It's quite funny actually; I think it says very much about the nature of the act. I, for one, would never attempt bungee jumping. I don't like the free fall feeling and depending on just one thick bungee cord for survival is just a risk I wouldn't take. Nope, definitely not for me.

And last week I came across a quote which went something like:

Men: the desirable are always unavailable and the available always undesirable.

The story of my life. That same day, I came across this other quote:

Seduce my mind and I'll give you my body. Find my soul and I'm yours forever. ~ Anonymous

Love it. What sensual words they are!

Today's three things to be thankful for:

1. Secured a dinner reservation at Bobby Chinn, a fine dining restaurant in Hanoi, on my first night in the city! Yes, I do plan my meals early.

2. Picked up Rin Tin Tin: The Life and the Legend, a book I had reserved at the library. Hurray, new reading material!

3. Got my nasi lemak fix at this hole-in-the-wall eatery run by Indonesian Chinese. Wednesday is nasi lemak day and I go there when I miss having Malay food, I love their chicken curry, beef rendang, sambal goreng and other Malay fare. Their curries are the real stuff and not like the ones served in Hong Kong eateries where they are usually sweet, watered down bastardised versions. What's more, the food's cheap!

还要逛吗?

你有时一定怀疑老天的货架上根本没有准备好一个要拿来跟你谈恋爱的人选, 而你像呆子一样推着空空的购物车在无垠的超级市场的无穷无尽的货架和货架之间眼花缭乱疲于奔命, 你能和店员们老板们其他顾客们哭诉些什么呢? 能不能换家超市还是干脆别逛超市啦!

~ 蔡康永 (台湾知名节目主持人)

读了蔡康永昨天在微薄发的短讯又激发了想用中文写作的灵感。不知为什么，最近就想要多练习用中文写作。有时候， 只有用中文才能表达某种意思或心情。语言就是那么的有趣。

他写出了好多单身男女的心声。 往往即使买到了东西， 带回家用了才发现是个烂货，最终还是要扔掉不是吗？ 即使是烂货，是不是买到比没买到好呢？ 可能用一下，从中取到短暂的快乐和人生经验也不是件坏事。

曾经有把东西放进购物车里，但最后还是要把东西放会原位因为发现东西用了只会把自己弄伤。 不适合用的东西最好是仍掉！ 千万不要心软或舍不得，让后又把东西放进购物车里。旧的不扔， 新的怎能来？

现在我还推着空空的购物车， 但香港这个超级市场也不好找适合的东西。这里雌的比雄多， 那就难上加难了！ 我换了几个超市到现在还推着空车，坦白说心灵有点累。现在也不想刻意的去购物，但也会抱着能找到东西买的希望继续推。如果有什么好货突如其来地掉进我购物车里或被我找到那我当然高兴啦！ 但如果没有也没关系啦。我还有其他消闲活动可以做，你说不是吗？

记得买东西一定要耐用、品质好。如果你和我一样在推购物车，那就祝你早日找到符合你条件的那样东西吧！

One-Woman Enabled Clothes

Though I'm not a huge fashionista - my mum will tell you with much chagrin that I'm so lazy when it comes to dressing up to the extent of being sloppy at times - I do like browsing fashion magazines and the Asos website once in awhile. Well OK, I admit that I also take the occasional detour to H&M if I find myself near any of their stores in Hong Kong. I'm a woman after all, right?

When I buy clothes these days, there's one more factor to consider - whether or not I can put it on by myself. 'Cos if the answer's a 'No', then that piece of clothing is a no-buy. It's just one of those things that come with living alone. I mean, I HAVE to be able to put on the dress/blouse on my own. Can't possibly go knocking on my neighbours' door and ask for someone's help to zip/button me up. They'll think I'm a nutter. And really, I don't know any of my neighbours. There are seven other units on the floor, all families, and I don't know and hardly see any of them. Such is the case with modern living.

So that means my wardrobe cannot consist of dresses with a long line of buttons at the back or a zip that extends way down the back. I've had to forgo dresses before on that account. Or maybe what I can do next time is to tie a whole string to the zip to help me pull it up like a wetsuit!

Anyway, those are my silly musings on a cold Friday here in Hong Kong. What to be thankful for today?

1. An easy day at work
2. A yummy vegetarian Japanese pork curry (it's really just gluten) lunch bought from my favourite vegetarian cafe near my office
3. Managed to book a body massage session at the last minute for the evening. Hurray, I will have a good night's sleep tonight for sure!

Have a good weekend peeps!

听别人的故事 Listening to Others' Stories

我们为什么这么爱听别人的故事？ 不是因为我们真心想勘查别人的脚印、而是因为我们想知道 ～ 我们还有多少条可以选择的路。

～ 蔡康永 （台湾著名主持人和作家）

The above Chinese quote was taken off a Weibo post (the Chinese version of Twitter) written by Kevin Tsai, a famous TV variety show host and writer in Taiwan. In it, he writes:

Why is that we love listening to other people's stories? It's not because we really want to follow their lives; it's really because we want to know what other paths we can choose to take in our lives.

Tis true, isn't it? Often it's by talking to more people that we get more ideas and knowledge of what's outside of our everyday sphere in life. And in doing so, we can consider alternative routes in our life path. It also reminds me that I haven't been talking to enough new people. Have you? I hope you are not being a hermit like me. 千万不要学我喔！

A friend wrote recently in an email thread among a group of us that she thinks she should do something different in her life and "not continue being a boring accountant..... But that needs a lot of courage...."

Of course it needs a lot of courage. It's often the case with anything that's fun and interesting out there, isn't it? I can only hope that she will find whatever it is that she wants and have the courage to go for it. Or at least take a stab at it. As far as this is concerned, I can honestly say that I've always been true to myself and have no regrets!

So today's three things to be thankful for:
1. I had a very easy day at work - a lovely way to start the first work day of the year. Let's hope this sets the tone for the rest of it.

2. I signed up for two short courses conducted by the Hong Kong University. I'm not going to get any return on investment on them and it's done purely for fun. But hey, not everything needs a ROI right? At least in learning something new, I will feel like I'm "progressing" in some way and help to keep my mind active.

3. I searched the HK Public Library online catalogue, found and reserved a book I wanted. It's Rin Tin Tin: The Life and the Legend by Susan Orlean. Can't wait to get my hands on it! Though I've started reading ebooks on my iPhone, I do love the feel of a hard copy book much better! Plus I'm a real sucker for dog stories.

20 Life-changing Questions

I came across this post at The Financial Blogger and thought these were useful questions to ask of oneself as we head into the new year. I reproduce the questions from the post here.

1. What is the most amazing thing you did in 2011?

I don't think 'amazing' is the most apt word for it, but the most significant event for me this year is the move back to HK. It's a city I enjoy being in at this point in my life, even though I have my low moments too.

2. What are you going to do to make things even more amazing in 2012?

I want to visit a country I have never been before and that's going to be Vietnam over the Easter break. Hurray! I also want to be really fit again and for that, I'd like to train up for either the HK Round Island outrigger race or the Oxfam Trailwalker charity race. The former would mean going back to paddling.

I also want to take up some courses conducted by the Hong Kong University. The uni conducts many short interesting courses and the one I'm eyeing for the first half of 2012 is an introductory course to the basics of Traditional Chinese Medicine.

3. What is the biggest mistake you made in 2011?

Can't think of anything major.

4. Why have you not quit your job yet?
Note: you may have a really good reason and this will help you appreciate your job even more

Because I've only been at this job for 7.5 months and I should probably be sticking to this job to make my CV look a little better and because I need to be at a job for at least three years to make a bank more willing to loan me money should I be able to buy a flat in future.

5. Are you happy about where you are in your life?

Yes and no. While I don't mind this job at this point in time, I don't wish to be stuck in this place forever. I need to think of other avenues to explore and work towards them!

What the hell are you waiting for to change something if you answered no to the previous question???

Not the time to change yet - no energy and no money for it.

6. What is holding you back in your life? (what's your biggest fear?)

Lack of money.

7. If you have only one word to describe your actions for 2012, what would it be?

Change

8. What do you want to do with your money?

Invest it and make it grow so that I can, hopefully, buy a small flat and also have a steady stream of passive income.

9. What is your daily source of energy? Of happiness?

The sun. Haha. No, it's true, I like seeing the sun high in the sky and shining brightly. My mood is a little better just by seeing that the weather's good. On a more philosophical note, I look forward to weekends where I can get outdoors and go hiking. I love being out in nature and that makes me happy; I get that balance from being outdoors.

I'm happy knowing that many of my family and friends are happy and healthy. I'm happy knowing that I have friends in different parts of the world whom I still keep in touch with. I'm happy knowing that I have people out there who read the ramblings on this blog that I've kept for 8.5 years - it's been the only constant in my life all these years and the only thing I've been committed to! Haha!

10. Where do you want to be in 5 years?

Location-wise, probably still in Hong Kong. I want to have saved up more money. Maybe married by then with a kid or two??? Well, like it or not, my biological clock is ticking away but unfortunately no one's picking this clock up...

11. How are you going to get there? (the how is more important than the where ;-0 )

Be more disciplined with my spending, eat out less, find more freelance work. As for the personal life part, I guess I just have to make myself go out more and just stop being a hermit!

12. If you had to start something over, what would it be?

I wouldn't study what I did in university, i.e. Mass Communications. On hindsight, my uni mates and I have concluded that it's a pretty useless course. I'd have gone into something totally different like Traditional Chinese Medicine.

13. Why are you not starting it over, then? (it's never too late to redo something for the first time)

Lack of money and still weighing up if it's worth doing such a long part-time course at this age. Working full-time and studying part-time is no easy feat.

14. What are you grateful for?

My family, friends and health.

15. What would be the most amazing thing that could happen to you in 2012?

Would it be extremely lame to say to meet someone special?

16. What are the 3 things you will do so this has a chance of happening?

1 - go out and take part in activities I enjoy to meet people
2 - don't know; someone please tell me
3 - don't know; someone please tell me

17. Tell me 1 thing that makes you smile every single day of your life?

Hearing from family and friends

18. If you could go back in time and tell yourself something you didn't know 10 years ago, what would it be?

Study something different, save more and invest more wisely, date more, go out more. Don't be afraid of change - explore the world as much as you can when you're young and have nothing much to lose!

19. What would "you in 10 years" tell yourself today so you have a great 10 years in front of yourself?

Save more, invest wisely, go out more. Be comfortable with being alone.

20. Name one person you want to help in 2012 and how you will help him/her?

Can't think of anyone in particular. Maybe I'll go sponsor a dog or moon bear at some animal shelter instead. I have more compassion for these animals than I do people.

Anyhow, 2011 has been a pretty good year overall and here's to a fab 2012! Happy new year, everyone!

What About Me? 那我呢?

Today's a colleague's last day. She and I have gotten pretty close in the months that I've been in this company. We get along well because we're around the same age and we are of similar frequency and wavelength so to speak.

While I'm always happy for colleagues who are moving on to greener pastures - in this case she's relocating to Taipei because her newly wedded husband is Taiwanese and is based there - it also leaves me with the question, "What about me? Where am I heading? When's it going to be my turn to move on?"

It almost feels like I'm being abandoned and left behind. As my other colleagues say, she has "上岸了", i.e. reached the shore as opposed to us struggling sea turtles. But anyway, here's to us sea turtles for staying strong and brave in the big oceans and seas of life! Happy Thursday!

就算被困著，也能有旅行般的心情

我想換一座城市，就算被困著， 應該也能擁有，旅行般的心情吧......

~ 李大仁 《我可能不會愛你》

在《我可能不會愛你》第10集里，李大仁对程又青解释他为什么决定去新加坡工作的原因。除了想远离她一点，让自己不要那么想她、努力不爱她，李大仁也说了以上那句话。他那句话说出了我对香港的心声。

我热爱旅行， 恨不得这一生能当一位旅行者。但现实生活就是充满很多无奈和脱卸不了的责任。这个梦想恐怕这一辈子也实现不了。可能梦想的定义就是实现不了的东西， 但我觉得人活着就要有梦想。至少有了梦想就会有去追求的意志和奋斗精神。即使达不到梦想， 我相信追求的过程也富有教育性和充满难忘的经验。

所以决定搬回香港可以说是我对梦想折中的办法。新加坡依然是「家」，但在那里呆了那么久就闷了。这五年来一直搬来搬去，从新加坡搬到伦敦， 伦敦搬回新加坡然后搬到香港，香港搬回新加坡，然后再搬回香港。说起来自己也觉得累！ 但住在伦敦和香港都令我有旅行的感觉。因为对新搬来的城市还陌生， 去哪里都含有新鲜感，仿佛像旅客。我喜欢这种感觉。即使平日上下班也不觉得生活太单调乏味。

如果你跟我一样， 远离故乡在外工作，是否也有同感呢？

一句話介紹

剛在我的微薄首頁寫了我的一句話介紹。其實要寫這些短短的介紹並不容易， 因為最多只允許寫70個字。很多時候越少字就越難寫。想了一會兒就寫了以下幾句。

一位還在世界尋找屬於她角落的女子。一位還在尋找愛的女子。一位還在尋找幸福的女子。一位還在尋找自己的女子。

嗯， 那就是現在的我！

Simple Joys

Yesterday was a day filled with simple joys. I loved that the sky was so blue - a rare phenomenon in HK - and that the sun was shining high and bright. I love such gorgeous winter days. Well, it's technically winter but it was a nice balmy 25 C by mid-day, so I took the opportunity to head to the park near my office during my lunch break to soak in some sun.

I love the feel of the sun on my skin. Nevermind all that talk about UV rays damaging skin. I mean, a little bit of sun won't hurt. At the park, I could look out to the eastern side of the Hong Kong harbour and a cool sea breeze was blowing. How some colleagues can spend their entire lunch break at their desks baffles me. Me? I can't wait to get out and walk around. So I had a beautiful lunch break munching on my falafel sandwich at the park while taking in the view of Kowloon's peaks perched against an azure blue canvas with a gentle wind whispering in my face.

Then at about 3pm, I decided to take a gamble and ask a friend out for dinner that night. To my absolute delight, she said 'Yes!', adding that the homework that she had to do for her MBA could wait. After all, one has to eat anyhow, right? You know how it is these days - you can hardly ever get anyone to go out at the last minute because everyone is always too busy or has a schedule that's packed for the next six months. It's like you have to 'book' people at least six months in advance these days.

In the afternoon I had also received two separate emails from two readers - Lizzie and Cindy - dropping me a note to say hi for the first time. Thanks ladies, hearing from you two was a really pleasant surprise and it really made my day. Such a treat to receive such lovely emails!

So henceforth, I have told myself I will have to find something to be happy about every day. :)

Homesick

It's now back to the daily grind after a two-week break in Singapore. I was lazy when it came to blogging during my time at home (yes, Singapore is still considered home). I had a great time catching up with family and friends, spent time reading, went swimming, ate a lot (of course) and even managed some freelance work. Highlights of the trip include two weddings, homecooked food, and meeting my friends' babies.

For some reason, I felt rather sad this time when flying out of Singapore and back to HK. After my family dropped me off at the airport and while waiting for my flight, pangs of homesickness washed over me even before I had flown off. Perhaps it was the catching up with old friends - from primary and secondary school, junior college, university, paddling pals etc - making me miss the camaraderie and collective memories we share. I miss all these friends of mine. I miss how I can speak in English and/or Singlish with them, knowing that I'll be fully understood. I miss how I can talk about the dumbest and most intimate things with some of these friends and not be judged. Then there is also the feeling of being doted on by the parents and older relatives. Homecooked food, a rare treat for me these days, never tasted so good.

I guess being back home for a long stretch tends to bring out such feelings. It's like having to adjust back to life in HK again. A friend whom I met up with on Saturday asked if I ever had moments where I felt so alone in this world to the extent that it gets REALLY depressing. Yes, I've had many of those moments - and often. It happens when I travel alone; when I'm walking along the streets of HK; when I see couples and young families; when I'm eating by myself in the park at lunch time etc. Such feelings are exacerbated when one is living alone in a foreign land. But oh well, the price to pay for a little adventure, no?

Lazy to Make Friends

I was attempting to practise my Chinese writing skills in the previous entry - it was probably a rather crappy attempt. In any case, the entry was inspired by a quote from episode 8 of the Taiwanese drama In Time With You and it basically says that one becomes lazier when it comes to socialising and making friends as one gets older. And the reason being that you become lazy in repeating your life story over and over again. You don't want to tell for the umpteenth time where you're from, where you work, what you do, where you live etc. It's a tiring but unavoidable process when meeting new people.

It's true - you do get lazy when you reach a certain age. Can't do the late night-outs all that often anymore with all that socialising. Your body protests when you stay up late for parties, which are dwindling in numbers anyway. In your 30s, you're more likely going to get invited to your friends' children's parties. In any case, I've never been a party animal. I have always been somewhat of a nerd. I like to read and write - both solitary activities. I'm no social butterfly either. I don't go to networking events because I don't enjoy making small talk and schmoozing with a bunch of strangers and the few I've gone to I've always found phony and pretentious. Clearly not my thing.

I don't purposely go out of my way to socialise. I only go to events and activities I know I'll enjoy. If I happen to meet people whose company I enjoy and can get along with through these activities, it's a bonus. Many people say to me, 'But I thought you were very extroverted and outgoing since you're so outdoorsy." I say that's a common misconception - being outdoorsy doesn't equate to being extroverted nor vice versa. You CAN be one without being the other. I would classify myself as an introvert, just not an extreme one. I'm definitely not the life of a party and in a big group of people I fade into the crowd to be an onlooker and bystander. That's my comfort zone.

So how? Like that how to get to know people and meet someone? OK, the truth is, I'm scared. Dating IS scary - there is the fear of rejection, of being judged and of getting hurt. Why must dating be so difficult???

懒得交新朋友

懒得交新朋友的原因是因为懒得从头交代自己的人生。

~ 《我可能不会爱上你》

就像偶像剧的台词一样， 近年觉得年纪越大就越懒得交新朋友。 也许是老了, 没有精力去参加派对、主动跟人闲聊之类的。其实我十几二十岁的时候也没有怎么出去, 现在也没有。我很少参加那些networking活动, 因为不喜欢应酬和跟一班我不认识的人讲场面话。那种场合很累, 不中意。

交新朋友就要从头交代自己的人生。要跟别人讲你生长在哪里啊, 现任什么工作啊, 在哪里居住等等的事情。这是逃不了的过程。年纪越大就越没有耐性, 不想重复话题。

其实我个性很「宅」; 喜欢宁静少人的地方、喜欢阅读写作。但我也很喜欢户外活动，周末时经常和一群朋友到山上健行远足。很多人误以为喜欢户外活动就是外向的人，其实这两者不一定相提并论。

所以说, 我不会刻意去参加什么交际活动; 我只做自己喜欢做的事。如果当中结交和自己比较投机的朋友那就是个「分红」。看, 我这样懒惰的态度怎么去认识多一些朋友, 怎么去找对象? 嗨!

Signs of Age

For my trip back to Singapore next trip, I've had to borrow a medium-sized luggage bag with wheels that I can wheel around as the one I have is too big. The next size down is a backpack for a long backpacking trip and now I can't imagine using that anymore. It's definitely a sign of age - I can't do backpacks anymore. The shoulders and back don't want to bear that kind of weight again and really, it's kind of unglamorous for a 30-something year old woman to be carrying a huge backpack to work while clad in office wear (I'm heading straight to the airport after work next Friday). So I've decided I'll have to get one for myself after this trip. Yes, the switch from backpack to trolley bag is another one of those age milestones.

Other signs of age: sales staff and wait staff call you 阿姐 or 小姐 (Miss) and no longer 小妹 (young girl). Parents get their kids to call you "Auntie" or "阿姨" instead of "姐姐" (Big Sister). There are more fine lines on my face, skin's not so taut and am getting more and more white hair.

With my birthday coming up in two weeks, I can't help but think about age again!

Another Solo Journey

After every solo trip, I'd usually say it's the last time I'm doing it alone but then like a habit I can't shake off, I repeat the action. And so I made my way to Taipei last week for a short four-day getaway that saw me exploring more of the city and eating at some nice spots. It's not that I particularly enjoy travelling alone - although it does have its merits - but I tend to decide on trips rather late which then makes it hard for interested friends to fit in with my schedule. As one gets older, the pool of interested friends also dwindles due to their commitment to their boyfriends/husbands/children. Usually the second and third options go hand in hand.

One of the biggest disadvantages about solo travel is the cost per unit in whatever you do. This is always highest as a lone traveller and it kinda sucks. Singles are SO discriminated against. I feel like I need to hire a boyfriend or something. It can also get lonely and for someone who loves to eat, I don't get to try as much food as compared to travelling with a companion(s). As a solo traveller you also can't leave your belongings to someone else to mind while you rush to the washroom. Bit annoying when you have to lug everything to the washroom which can sometimes be really tiny! You'll also inevitably end up with very few photos of yourself in them - not that that's a problem for me since I'm not particularly photogenic anyway!

Being a solo traveller forces you to learn a lot of life skills. You'll learn to be more resourceful in getting things done. You have to figure your way around cities, read maps, and you'll no longer be shy in approaching strangers for help. Heck, you'll no longer be shy in approaching strangers just to have a short, if meaningless, conversation! Having travelled alone many times, I've gotten used to doing so. As is the case in my daily life, it's a situation I've become used to. I can survive, but I don't particularly love it. True, one gets a lot of 'me' time, but I get too much of it as things stand. But I really do like the fact that I can go wherever I want without having to ask anyone if they'd like to do the same; I fix my own schedule. There's no need to take turns to use the washroom in the room. Also, I have time to indulge in reading - something I don't get to do much of in my everyday life.

I always take a book along with me when I travel. It's one of the best travel companions. This time, I brought with me a food memoir called 'Blood, Bones & Butter' by a chef called Gabrielle Hamilton who owns and runs the restaurant Prune in New York City. Managed to finish the book while I was in Taiwan. It's an interesting read where Hamilton writes frankly of how she came to be in the food business - it wasn't a profession she had set out to pursue but somehow stumbled into it and stayed in it. Along the way, we learn of her struggles with her family, her ambiguous sexuality (she swings both ways), and the hard work she has put in to become the successful chef/owner of Prune she is today.

I also love writing postcards to friends and family when I travel. I still like the idea of putting something in the postbox and sending my thoughts of the moment when I wrote the postcard. Writing postcards also gives me something to do - I love writing postcards when sitting in a cafe or teahouse while watching the world go by. As you can probably guess, I like taking things slow when on holiday. I don't like rushing through things as I think that's stressful and completely defeats the purpose of a holiday.

Overall, the trip was still a nice break from Hong Kong and I always feel alive whenever I travel. I love that feeling! Next post - pictures!

Things You Learn On Your Own

When you live on your own without help from a domestic helper or part-time cleaner, there are certain things you'll have to learn. But I think societies like Hong Kong and Singapore don't encourage independence as some services are just too convenient and thus people would rather pay others to do it for them.

Many Singaporeans and Hong Kongers have grown up with a full-time domestic helper at home, making them clueless about many things even through to their adulthood. In Hong Kong, a newspaper article reported that many children these days no longer eat homecooked food, simply because their parents don't know how to cook as they had grown up with domestic help and never learnt how to do it. It's sad, really.

For the most part, being on your own will usually need you to do or learn the following:

1. Cook - you can survive without cooking in cities like Hong Kong and Singapore, but definitely not in cities in most Western countries. In the latter cities, unless you're earning big bucks and can eat out every day, you're going to have to cook for yourself to save on food costs.

2. Use a washing machine - I know friends in Singapore who can't operate one 'cos they have never had to. Laundry service in Hong Kong is cheap because many households don't have space to have a washing machine so there are laundromats at every other street corner. But Hong Kong is an exception rather than the norm.

3. Read washing labels on clothes - failing to learn how to do so will result in shrunken clothes and/or clothes that have been stained with cloth dye that has leached out from other non-colour fast clothes.

4. Clear hair from sinks and bathroom floor - do it or risk having blocked pipes and foul smelling water running into your house. If you're staying at my place, I expect you to clear your hair from the shower and sink. I don't even like picking up my own hair, not to mention others.

5. Wash the toilet - well, unless you want to be living in a shit hole, I guess there's no avoiding it, is there?

That's all I can think of at the moment but I'm sure there's a whole lot more I can add to the list. But my brain's tired now after an afternoon out on a nice yacht coupled with some wakeboarding (Woohoo! Good fun!!!). Bedtime.

I Don't Care

One of the things about growing older, or more specifically once you reach your 30s, is that you don't care so much about what people think of you. Perhaps it's to do with being jaded and just not having the energy to care, but I think it's more a case of being more confident and comfortable of who you are as a person.

A friend and I were just talking about this on Tuesday, saying that these days we don't make the effort if we don't like the person(s). AND we don't care if the person likes us or not. I was just telling my friend that I was trying to avoid one of the guys in our group outing even though I was the one who had introduced him to my group of hiking friends. The guy is a friend of a friend from Singapore and I have only met him perhaps three times. But for some reason, I don't really enjoy talking to him. Perhaps it's because the way he talks irritates me, perhaps it's the fact that he's always trying to "educate" me about hiking in Hong Kong when I have obviously more experience and have hiked in more places than he has.

We just don't click. Period. I didn't even make any effort to make small talk on the way home with him (his train stop is just one before mine). I know, you're thinking, 'What a b*tch!!!'

As is the case with romantic partners, chemistry has to exist between friends too. It's either there or isn't. If it doesn't exist, I don't bother to make any effort these days to make it exist. Like dating, one should just move on and not waste time, agree?

Surviving as a Freelance Writer and/or Editor

As part of an email to a friend yesterday, I had come up with some conditions that needed to be met before one could survive as a full-time freelance writer and/or editor. It seemed like it'd make a good blog post so I thought I'd put it up and expand on it. As someone who has been a full-time freelancer, I think I'm suitably qualified to have come up with this list. To earn enough to survive, i.e. pay for transport, food, phone bills, insurance, entertainment (movies, restaurants etc) etc, I've concluded that you'll need to have/do the following.

1. Have a spouse who earns a stable income enough to feed the family on one salary. What you earn as a freelancer will be used to cover the costs of cheap stuff like groceries, the occasional eating out and things like movies.

2. Have at least 20 work contacts you can tap on for gigs.

3. Have at least ten jobs that you know you get to do monthly. e.g. sub-editing for a monthly magazine(s) or writing a column for a monthly newsletter/magazine.

4. Live at home and don't have to pay rent. (Either have this or Condition 1 above)

5. Don't have a mortgage, car, student or other major loans to pay off.

6. Be willing to work round the clock, i.e. over nights, weekends and public holidays.

7. Be very good with budgeting and keeping aside an emergency pool of money every month because many clients won't pay on time. (That said, you should be doing this even in a full-time job but it's all the more crucial when one's freelancing!)

8. Be thick-skinned and willing to chase for payment. So you'd have to be really organised and meticulous with the recording of invoices you issue.

9. Be thick-skinned and promote yourself to whoever you meet. Shove your namecard in people's faces.

10. Be extremely disciplined with your time. No watching TV or napping when working from home.

Ostensibly I'm hardly accomplished in any of the above which kinda explains why I am where I am. :|

If I Could Turn Back Time

Part of my job involves giving a 1hr 20min presentation on written communication to fresh grads who have just joined the company. Each time I have to face about 65 of them at a go. *gulp* I have done five sessions so far and but I still feel nervous each time. Public speaking really isn't my thing.

Looking at these fresh grads reminds me of when I first graduated. All of the kids in the classes I take aren't even accountancy graduates (some are even English majors). But lured by a prestigious brand name, they have all decided to become auditors. I asked an English major what she was doing in the company, and she said "It's a prestigious name."

OK, practical answer. Typical of Asians. Tread the safe path. If I had my way, I would be telling these kids how they shouldn't be here listening to me but instead be going on working holidays to other countries while they still can. Travel, see the world on a shoestring budget, meet people, see that there are other options and that there's more to life than the usual path of getting a "good" job straight after university.

I found out that Hong Kong citizens have many options when it comes to working holidays. Young people can choose to go to countries such as Ireland, Australia, New Zealand and Japan. Singapore? Only the UK. So pathetic. But at least I took the opportunity when I could. I think it's the Singapore's government ploy in trying to keep young Singaporeans from flying the coop.

If I could go back in time, I would get a job as a flight attendant with Singapore Airlines or whatever international airline straight after finishing my A-levels at 18. That's a great way to see the world and get paid while at it. And while one's young, it's alright to take on such a job which really, when you strip it down to its basics, it's really just a well-paid waitress and cleaner. I'd have done that for two years and then return back to the books, finish university and then go off on a working holiday to some other country. Better to do all that when one's young as there are too many opportunity costs as one gets older.

But alas, I'm no spring chicken now.

Flatmate? No, thank you.

Last night, my friend whatsapped me and asked if I would consider sharing my flat. My friend was asking around for her friend, a 20-something girl from HK who had just returned from the UK and was looking to rent a room.

My answer? An outright 'Unfortunately no'. Nothing personal of course, it's just that I'm way past the age of having flatmates. Flat-sharing is the stuff of undergrads and the 20-somethings. Please don't ask this set-in-her-ways 32-year-old to flat-share anymore. I love having this flat I'm in all to myself. And besides, my spare room is for my visitors and the third bedroom (a tiny tiny one) is used as a storeroom for all my stuff.

Yes, I have two bathrooms, but I still make use of both all the same. OK, the fridge is only 1/3 filled but at least I don't have to label my food. I don't have to bother about splitting household chores; I clean whenever I want (which is pretty often may I add). While I know having a flatmate can reduce the amount I pay on rent, I'd rather pay more than have to share the small flat with someone else. I mean who knows what people this 20-something will bring home? Or what bizarre habits she might have??

I've heard too many flatmate horror stories to want to share a flat with someone else while I can still afford to have my own place. I've already decided that unless the person(s) is family or my partner/husband, I'm never going to live with anyone else as long as I'm in HK. It's just way too difficult. The thing about HK is that because flats are so small, you're going to get in the other person's way no matter what.

So yeah, definitely won't be having a flatmate in HK!

Single People Are Too Free

I was having dinner with a single girlfriend (who's a transplanted Singaporean in HK like me) on Friday night and we were chatting about how long we would be staying in HK for and where our lives would take us. My friend then commented that single people are too free so we end up philosophising about things like the meaning of life all the time.

I thought about it and realised it's quite true - at least for myself. I always seem to be thinking about where my life is heading, what is it that I'm really meant to do with my life, and is what I'm doing now really what I'm happy with? You get the drift. These questions twirl around in my head all the time, especially when I'm sitting at my work desk in a goliath of an accounting firm where I'm just a number in the books, identified by my staff number.

Many single friends I know ponder these questions all the time; many of us have no answers. Contrast this to our married peers, especially those with kids. For those who are mothers, a job is merely a means to an end for them to pay the bills for their children's education and other living expenses. They don't want to work overtime nor do they chase after some big promotion. All they want is that regular pay cheque and to be able to get off on the dot so they can go home to their kids asap. Everything is about the children - that's THEIR meaning of life. A girlfriend of mine in Singapore spends her whole day planning and cooking her one-year-old daughter's meals, and taking the kid to playschool and swimming lessons. That's become her life and her focus, and she doesn't bother pondering about where she's heading in her career and if her life has meaning.

Same story for other girlfriends of mine who have become mothers in the past few years. Is it right to be constantly pondering? Should I even bother? Wouldn't it be easier to just have things remain status quo and live out my life as a word cruncher in this accounting giant and turn into furniture there? Frankly I don't know, I haven't thought that far. I just know the idea of it doesn't sound THAT appealing. It seems like I have a problem with status quo. ;p

My friend and I were also saying that single people also tend to have short-term views of the future. Our plans generally do not extend beyond two years. Frankly, six months ago if you had asked me where I saw myself in the next one year, no let's make that six months, I certainly wouldn't have said Hong Kong! See, that's how short-term my plans are. But OK, now I can tell you that I'll be in Hong Kong for the next two years at least. That's as far into the future as I'll go for now.

I guess identifying and finding that thing / person / entity you want to live for is key to making life a little more meaningful and purpose-driven. Meanwhile, I continue searching...

爱情是一种遇见

爱情是一种遇见。不能等待，也沒有准备。

～ 《醉后決定爱上你》 偶像劇

如果爱情是一種遇见， 那为什么我总是遇不见？ 是因为我一直太急促， 没有放慢脚步看？ 还是我太匆忙， 没有仔细地观察？ 是这样连偶遇的机会都插身而过吗？ 我跨过世界的很多角落， 遇到了很多人， 但至今都还没有那所谓 "爱情的遇见"。 是我要求太高、太不实际吗？ 也许吧。我自己也不太清楚。曾经以为遇到了"他"。 很可惜这遇见变成了再见。

嗨， 我人生里还有多少个遇见呢？ 我还会有遇见吗？ 既然不能等待及不能准备， 就要尽量过着精彩的人生。同时也抱着"遇见"的希望。就只能这样啰。

Couch Hosting

Now that I live alone and have a spare room, I decided when I moved into this flat that I'd host Couchsurfers as a way of giving back to the community and meeting travellers. I tried Couchsurfing four years ago while travelling in Europe at the time when I was living in London and had met really lovely people through it, so I thought I had to do my part for the community. So far I have hosted three people and I liked two of them but didn't have a good impression of the second one.

I'm very selective of the people I choose to host. I get requests every other day because HK is not a city where many people host simply because people probably don't even have enough space for themselves, let alone a guest, what with the miniscule flats that exist here.

On my profile, I state that I will only host one person at any one time even though I can easily host three, but really that'd be too much work not to mention a lot of money forked out on my part to pay for electricity, water and gas bills. I state that I'm not located right in the heart of town so the place is not suitable for anyone wanting to check out HK's night life. I also specify NO SMOKING and that I won't host people who plan to return in the wee hours of the night as I go to bed by 12 midnight (actually more like 1am but they don't have to know that).

I only choose to host people when I know that they have read my profile. Often you get people who don't read your profile and are just sending out the same email to god knows how many people they are trying to find a couch to surf on. I can tell if people have read my profile or not by what they write in their message to me.

Firstly it's definitely a NO for people who just write 'Hi, I want a couch to surf...'. Come on, at least put a name OK. That just reeks of insincerity. I also won't bother to host people who write 'Hi Joan Ho'. Sorry, that's rude too...addressing someone by her full name. I'm an editor and writer. I take note of such things. Sorry if it pisses anyone off for such anal retentive tendencies. But THAT'S why I do what I do. I also tend not to host men as I think I have to be more careful as a single woman living alone. I may host someone only if he is verified by many people on their profile or if he's a friend of someone I know. While a level of trust exists among the community for Couchsurfing to work, one can never be too careful about such things.

It's also a no if someone writes and asks me to host them and their friend. Obviously didn't read my profile. Or if they ask to stay for more than two nights it's a no too as I specify that I'll only host for two nights. Contrary to what you may think, hosting takes effort. I mean you can't not talk to the person and just leave them to their own devices. One 21-year-old Brit was even hinting that maybe I could host him for an entire month while he was here on a teaching summer programme, and that maybe we could get to know each other better during that time and come to an 'agreement'. Yah right dude. You have nothing good to offer me in return so what grounds do you have to negotiate? I don't think so my dear. And really, I have no interest in getting to know you better.

Couchsurfing is essentially about cultural exchange and helping out fellow travellers who are - supposedly, you'd hope anyway - interested in getting to know more about you and vice versa. And when I host anyone, I feel the need to be a good host and make sure their stay is a comfortable one. I also want to share about Singapore, Hong Kong and Chinese culture.

I've also decided that I won't host anyone below 30. My second surfer was an unappreciative 25-year-old American chick from San Francisco who didn't even bother to show me any appreciation whatsoever. I mean, come on, at least buy me dinner. But no, nothing like that at all. I think these young Americans just take for granted that since you decide to host, you shouldn't expect any form of appreciation or return. Other young 20-somethings have written, but I've decided they are too young and jumpy for this 30-something old soul that is me. I wouldn't have anything to say to them and really, I don't want to be reminded of my bygone years when everything seemed possible and the world was my oyster! And oh, it's also a no for people who don't bother to put up a picture of themselves and write a little more about themselves in their profile to give people an idea of who they are. If you can't even be bothered to do that, don't expect me to open my door to you just like that.

At least the other two surfers I hosted were nice. They treated me to a meal and the American lady from Florida whom I hosted a few days ago (she's close to my mum's age at 58) even bought me a bunch of flowers, a scented candle and some bread for breakfast. Well, rightly so, because I had rescued her from a really bad situation. I was actually supposed to be her backup host as she already had a couch to surf on. Thankfully she had the foresight to set herself up with a backup host as she had found herself in a disaster.

Her original host was a single 35-year-old American guy (she'd thought she'd be safe with a fellow English-speaking American) who turned out to be some egoistic creep who had his underwear and porn magazines strewn around his flat and was a marijuana-smoking (it's illegal to do so may I add) one while at it. She told me he was an investment banker (more like wanker if you ask me) who thought the world of himself and also saw himself as god's gift to women. *finger in throat* Typical white trash behaviour displayed only when they are in Asia I tell you.

And to top it off, he told her she had to share the small room on the second night with a lesbian couple that he was going to host as well. Right... I think he was trying to drive her out the moment he realised he wasn't going to sleep with her. So the poor lady was so scared in the first night she was there and decided to make a run for it the next day. So that was where I came in, and became the good Samaritan. I mean, I had to readjust my entire schedule for her OK. But at least I knew she was very appreciative of my help and she turned out to be a very nice person to talk to.

I've been very polite all this while in answering every request I get, mostly to reject them and give some reason for doing so. E.g. I have visitors, I'm busy so it's inconvenient, I'm already hosting someone. But now I've decided I won't bother to reply if I know the person hasn't read my profile or just sounds plain rude or egoistic, or has no picture. I don't want to waste my time with such people nor am I inclined to help them out. Like too bad, go sort yourself out since you chose to travel here. I only choose to help sincere people.

While I host people and have surfed before, I don't think I'd surf again when I travel. I prefer staying in a hostel/hotel where I can come and go as I like. I prefer contacting Couchsurfers just to have a meal or have them show me around their city for a few hours, which is what I did when I was in Taipei last year. It's also a great way of meeting locals and most people are happy to oblige.

But to all my family and friends out there who are reading this, you are always more than welcome to stay with me. Don't worry, you won't be subjected to all the criteria above!

吃不饱， 饿不死 Enough, but not plentiful

Unlike other weekends where I'm usually out and about, I spent pretty much the whole weekend slaving away behind the computer as I had taken on some freelance work from clients in London and Singapore.

It's not that I don't treasure my weekends, but I think I shouldn't let the opportunity to make some pocket money pass me by. I count myself lucky that these people still ask me to do work even though I'm not based in the same places as they are, and therein lies the flexibility of editing and writing.

I was talking to a few friends recently about the monetary returns of my work and one of my friends summed it up succinctly with this Chinese phrase: 吃不饱， 饿不死. So while I'll never - fingers crossed - become down and out, I won't ever become rich as an editor either. Such is the life of an editor and writer.

People in this industry are rather useless when it comes to knowing how to invest and make their money work for them. We are words, not numbers, people. Sigh. What can I do to build my egg nest?

How do some people just take off for a year or two and just travel the world without a care? And many of these people aren't even rich. OK, granted they are young. But still, even when I was in my 20s, I wouldn't have just travelled for a year, backpacking and couchsurfing etc. I figure it's the Chinese in me. I can't just take off and travel because at the back of my mind I'd be so worried about money that I wouldn't even be able to enjoy myself.

Living in cosmopolitan and expensive cities like London, Hong Kong and Singapore, it's hard not to be concerned about one's financial situation. In Hong Kong especially, people are much more showy and flashy about their wealth.

What does it take to be less hung up about money? Someone please tell me.

Greater Purpose

I was chatting to a friend online the other night and was just telling her how free I had been at work, to the point that I actually felt bad about not doing anything and not earning my keep. There really is only so much surfing you can do before you get bored, or how many emails you can write to friends before you run out of friends to write to in a bid to look like you're doing something. (This week's a different story as I'm swamped and actually earning my keep.)

But honest to god, it was no fault of mine that I was twiddling my thumbs at work last week. I had even gone to ask my boss for work but she had none. Last week I even managed to make use of some time to work on an advertorial I was writing for a magazine in Singapore. I mean, I might as well put my time to better use and earn some pocket money, right? I was saying to my friend that even though I'm an underachiever, even that was a bit too slack for me. Underachievers have their standards too, you know.

Then my friend said I shouldn't say that about myself, ie that I'm an underachiever. She said that she believes everyone has a greater purpose in life and that perhaps mine's writing. Hmm...I don't know. Perhaps for some people it's being a parent, spouse, doctor, nurse, social worker, teacher, singer, painter etc.

If a greater purpose really exists for everyone, then I don't think I've found mine yet. Have you?

Health is Wealth

A shock awaited me when I logged into Facebook a few days ago and saw this status update of a friend I got to know through hiking in Hong Kong:

It is with deep regret that I inform all of my sister's dear friends that H passed away peacefully last night surrounded by family and friends. We will keep you updated of funeral arrangements. ~ H's sister, T

I had to do a second take as H was only in her 30s and was an avid hiker. Later, I found out from my other hiking buddies that she had had breast cancer for quite awhile and her condition had deteriorated exponentially in the past few months. I was in a reflective mood following that, just thinking about life and its fragility.

I worry about the future pretty often, in particular what life would be like when I reach old age. Most of the time, I get anxious, scared and depressed when I think about it. Seeing at how expensive things are these days and then looking at what little money I'm earning, I really don't know how I'll ever have enough money to live on in old age. I look at so many of my friends and everyone seems so sorted - they have high-salary jobs, they've bought one or more properties, they know how invest their money well. It's like with some clicks on the computer, they have earned themselves a fortune by just buying and selling shares or trading in forex and what have you.

While I've read up on such things and dabbled in a little stock trading myself, I'm nowhere near those financial whizzes who seem to make money out of nothing. And not being a trust fund baby, it's not without reason that I worry about the future. I look at the old aunties and uncles clearing dishes and wiping tables at food courts and I worry about being like that when I'm old and greying.

But after awhile, I just have to remind myself that every person has his/her own path in life and that whatever we see is often only the surface. Rich and successful people have their own struggles and crosses to bear as well. Who knows? They might even envy the simple life some people lead. I remind myself to be thankful for my health, for being able to get up each day without feeling aches and pains, for being able to walk, see, hear, taste, touch, move. Thankful purely for being alive and well. For as cliched as it sounds, health really is wealth. So as long as I'm healthy, I can still earn a living somehow.

I know from other friends that H put up a brave fight and before she succumbed to her illness, she lived her life with passion and zeal. She led the hiking bunch of friends on hikes, and brought us to beautiful streams where we enjoyed ourselves splashing in the waterfalls and rock pools. When I was back in Hong Kong for a few days in November, we were just saying that we'll arrange to go on a trip together with the rest of the girls. The whole thing still seems so surreal, but I trust that H is in a better place now.

Not long ago, a Japanese reader of mine (but now we've become e-pals) who lives in Sendai wrote to say that she now has a whole new perspective on life after the tsunami tragedy. She said that after seeing so many lives cut short by the tsunami, she has now learnt to be thankful for what she has and has learnt not to dwell on the things she doesn't have. And the important thing is to live life to the fullest in the best way that she can.

For me, all I really want is to be a happy person surrounded by the people I love and being in a place that I like. I think all these years I've been trying as much as possible to make myself happy by chasing after the experiences that I want to have and the relationships that I wanted to have. I haven't been successful in every regard (especially when it comes to relationships) but at least I can tell myself that I've always been true to myself even if I've made mistakes along the way. That, I feel, is important to me.

So while I'm not leading my DREAM life because there are certain realities in life that I have to face, I pursue little moments of happiness and am constantly striving to achieve an acceptable compromise and equilibrium between dreams and reality.

I once read in a book that to make ourselves happy, we should be buying experiences and not material things. Meaning that, a person will be happier if he spent $10,000 going on a nice holiday rather than on a snazzy entertainment system. For the happiness derived from material things will last only for a short time, while the happiness derived from a holiday will last a long time as it'll leave you with pleasant memories that you can relive many times over.

I agree with that point of view as I certainly find that's true as far as I'm concerned. Hence, I choose not to spend my money on designer goods, choosing instead to spend on holidays as I want to see as much as I can of the world. But being able to do all that boils down to having good health at the most fundamental level.

So after all that rambling, I guess I'm really just trying to say that it's good to be alive.

On Writing

In the past nine months, I've written a lot more on a professional basis than I've ever done before and I've come to realise that writing is not so much about inspiration than it is about discipline. This is especially so when it comes to writing professionally, for like it or not, there's a deadline to be met.

Often, it's just about plonking yourself in front of the laptop and typing something, anything, that comes to mind. Getting the first words out is usually the toughest part but I've found that if I just type something, words will flow and I'll have to look at it a few times over and refine it again and again before I'm satisfied with the final product.

It's true what they say about writing being like exercise - the more you practise, the better and faster you get at it. Like exercise, it requires discipline to sit yourself down and write. I've decided that I'm going to try to update this blog at least twice a week so as to keep up with my writing, else I'll get rusty. It will be less about food than it will be about what's happening in my life and some thoughts that pass through my mind.

Recently, I've also discovered that I'm getting better at writing fluff. OK, I know all I write on this blog is fluff and there's nothing Pulitzer prize-winning about the things I write (neither am I capable of it I'd admit). But having worked on some articles for an interior design magazine lately, I've realised I'm quite good at penning such articles that really just contain a lot of descriptive writing. I suppose knowing how to bullsh*t in an elegant way is a useful skill to have too. Ha.

My friend Dawn commented in my previous post that I'm getting more lyrical. I don't know if that's a good or bad thing but I suppose it's an example of stuff I'll be writing. More introspective perhaps. Anyway, I write mainly 'cos I like to do so and it's an outlet for me. And let's hope that I can keep up with my writing regime and not let it fall apart like my exercise regime!

The Sounds of Morning

For some unbeknown reason, I woke up earlier than usual this morning. I was awake even before the sun was up. I lay on my bed for ten minutes, staring into nothingness and feeling a little pensive, and by 6.30am the sky had turned into a lighter shade of black tinged with some shades of blue. The bluish grey hues of the sky also seemed to stir the birds in the trees. Faint chirps and tweets of various sound frequencies and volume began to fill the air and herald the start of a new day.

I continued lying on my bed for a few minutes listening to these lovely avian tunes. I then decided to get off my butt and head to MacRitchie Reservoir for a morning walk. One of the things I love about where I live in Singapore is my proximity to MacRitchie. I love walking along the wooden-planked broadwalk that skirts the water and being surrounded by the trees that flank one side of the broadwalk.

In the past when I went jogging or walking there, I would take my iPod along. But I don't do so anymore because I much prefer listening to the music of the forest and giving my ears - usually inundated by the sounds of radio, TV, traffic noise, people talking etc - a rest from all that urban cacophony.

Once I left my iPod behind and began to listen, I realised that the forest was like an orchestra with Mother Nature wielding the baton as conductor. Walking through different stretches of the forest gave way to different sounds in different sections, like the various movements in a symphony. At one point, the high frequency metallic sounds of some insects filled the air, like razor blades being sharpened. A little farther on, a variety of birds - all faceless musicians as I walked along the broadwalk - cooed, hooted, tweeted, chirped, and hollered in a myriad number of rhythms and melodies. In the water, a fish darts and a 'dop' sound echoes in the air from that quick movement.

I looked up at the sky, by now a cheery azure shade, and felt cheered. It was going to be a lovely Sunday. :)

Magazine Cameo

In the April issue of L'Officiel (Singapore edition), I have made a cameo appearance in the Contributors page in my capacity as sub-editor of the magazine. It's probably the only time I'll ever find my face in a magazine.

The picture, however, isn't the most ideal as it's actually a little blurry. It was, however, the only (somewhat) suitable one I could find among all my photos. And get this, the photo here was taken in Seoul two years ago when I was having tea in a cafe with a friend in the Insadong area of the South Korean capital. It's not even recent!

For one, I don't have any good photos taken of myself since returning to Singapore. I hardly take photos in Singapore. Secondly, most of the photos I have of myself in Hong Kong are mostly of me dressed unglamorously in hiking gear - hardly the sort of image one would want to portray in a magazine that's about high fashion, luxe jewellery and obscenely expensive watches. What's worse, I wasn't even wearing any makeup.

So I now know the importance of always having on hand a candidly posed shot, if that makes sense. You know, the type of shot where you're actually posing for it but yet have to make it look casual, candid and cool? While you're at it, you should also make sure you're dressed nicely and wearing some makeup before clicking on the shutter. You never know when you might need such a photo!

The vainpot and bimbo in me is totally regretting not being prepared for such a situation!

My Singapore

In yesterday's edition of mypaper, there was an interview with Singaporean singer-songwriter Tanya Chua in the Chinese section of this bilingual newspaper. The headline read 蔡健雅叹新加坡太完美 (Tanya Chua laments that Singapore is too perfect) and the rest of the article was about she felt towards four cities that are very close to her heart.

There was Singapore, her country of birth; Mysore, a city in southern India where she found inspiration and strength again in continuing with singing and songwriting; Taipei, her adopted home where she's been based for the past five years; and Paris where she's been going to on her birthday and for new year's in the past four years to relax and imbibe the vibes of the city of love.

It was what she said about Singapore that struck a chord with me. Her feelings reflect what I, and many other Singaporean friends who have lived / are living abroad, feel about our homeland. Of Singapore, Chua describes it a thread that can never be cut (是永远剪不掉的线), something that is true for most Singaporeans who live abroad. At least for me, I tend to identify myself as being Singaporean first whenever I lived overseas. It was/is my identity and I still thought of my family and friends back home. There are always these emotional ties that bind no matter where I go.

Like many people who live in Singapore, Chua loves the convenience here. She says that everything is orderly and well planned. She cites the example of not having to worry about the streets being dirty nor worry about having to travel too far to get to a place. She also says she loves how there are trees everywhere. I'd have to agree with her on all these accounts. Singapore is an easy city to live in. Everything's efficient, trains run smoothly, there are no strikes to disrupt the order of things, the cleanliness of the streets is top-notch and the trees all around the island are lovely pockets of green amidst the urban jungle. One doesn't realise how much trees make a difference to Singapore's landscape until you go to other cities around the world.

However she reckons Singapore's orderliness is a double-edged sword and says, 'Everything's too clean, too orderly. Where's Singapore's vitality? Where's her soul? Sometimes there's a certain beauty and charm in chaos.' (一切太干净、太规划、太整齐、她的生命力在哪里？ 她的灵魂在哪里？ 有时候在乱当中也有一种美。) I feel the same too and just feel there's something a little less vibrant and colourful about Singapore when compared with cities like Hong Kong and Taipei that are a lot more chaotic.

I don't know, I've always been ambivalent about Singapore. While I love many things here and I think it's a good place to live in for the most part, I've always felt that it's too small for me. But this is something I can't do anything about since Singapore has its geographical limitations.

Perhaps what I need now is a holiday. That could just be the antidote to these restless stirrings I have been having of late.

Wandering

到處走，是為了尋找停下的理由。
I'm wandering in search of a reason to stay.

~ 林一峰 Chet Lam

I had a dream last night and the most vivid part of it was me bareback riding on a horse towards a vast expanse of beach. The horse was a handsome one with a shiny chestnut brown coat of fur and I was leaning down with my face near to his, fitting the curve of my body to the elegant lines of his and talking to him as he flew in the wind. The feeling was exhilarating as he carried me along in his long and powerful strides like a graceful warrior, and when the sea came into sight, he galloped faster as if wanting to get to the water as fast as he could. I, too, was filled with an overwhelming sense of happiness when I saw the sea, as if it were a friend I hadn't seen in a long time...

It was with a slight sense of disappointment when I woke up and discovered all that was just a dream. I love horses and would love to ride on one again. The last time I rode one was in Glenworth Valley, north of Sydney, eight years ago. Riding in the natural wilderness is a fantastic experience compared to doing it in a stable rink. Perhaps part of my dream also stems from the fact that I haven't been engaging in much sports these days due to injury. The plantar fasciitis condition on my feet still hasn't healed and I haven't been paddling either. I miss the sea a lot, but I can't be asked to make my way to Sentosa because of the cost of doing so (no thanks to the opening of the casino). I've been such a geek in the past months...hardly going out...the fact that I'm writing this entry on a Sunday at 11am says a lot.

I feel as if I need to get out of Singapore again. Recently I came to know about Hong Kong singer-songwriter Chet Lam's (林一峰) ninth album My Lonely Planet 思路, a double CD selection of Cantonese songs that speaks of his feelings towards leaving and returning home, and his thoughts as a world traveller as he jetsets to cities like cities like New York, Los Angeles, Paris, Vienna, Berlin, Dublin, Edinburgh, Shanghai and Xiamen.

Lam's lyrics encapsulate many a traveller's feelings, particularly those of us with a bit more of a literary streak and tend to ponder too much. Like Lam, my restlessness stems from the need of finding a reason to stay. If I meet the right person, I'd gladly settle down and have babies and what have you. If I were living in a place I love, I'd gladly stay put. While Singapore is not a bad place to be in, there are things I'd like in a place that it can never have. I want the great outdoors - hills and mountains to climb and streams and beaches I can swim in. Perhaps I've been in Singapore for too long - nothing about this city excites me any more.

Here I've selected some lines from two songs in My Lonely Planet which I love and translated them (taking it as practice for my translation classes). Hope you enjoy them too.

From: 维多利亚 Victoria

(In reference to Hong Kong's Victoria Harbour)

你是避风港等待着过客靠岸 You're the shelter waiting for passengers to alight
在你怀里停歇的人不怕巨浪 People waiting in your arms aren't afraid of the huge waves
让飘流的心得到一点温暖 You give wandering souls warmth
Oh my love, my Victoria

From: 游子意 A Traveller's Tale

每個城市都有顆心　不能輕易被看見 Every city has a soul that's not easily seen
馬路就像血脈一樣　把每個渴望相連 Roads are like blood vessels linking every glimmer of hope
每個城市都很熟悉　每個角落都陌生 Every city seems familiar yet every corner seems unfamiliar
停歇上路匆匆剎那　就等待那一個眼神 Taking a break from the journey, hoping to make some eye contact

...

每個旅人都有故事　你問他就會告訴你 Every traveller has a tale / Ask and he'll tell
細節可能有點偏差　反正留下的只有回憶 Details might be differ but what's left are memories
每個選擇都有遺憾　每個遺憾都有轉機 Every choice made has its regrets / Every regret can take a turn for the better
月落日出柳暗花明　人還在　心存感激 The sun sets and rises / there's always light at the end of the tunnel / I'm thankful to be alive

Just a Diploma Will Do

When I'm out and about, be it on a bus, in a train etc, I rather enjoy eavesdropping on other people's conversation. I'll then be trying to make out the background story, the relationship between the speakers and will sometimes be bemused at the opinions being voiced. It can be a rather amusing exercise and it's good for collecting anecdotes to be used in small talk.

So I was at the hairdresser's two weeks ago and overheard another client talking to her hairdresser. The client was a woman in her early 30s and was pregnant with her second child. She was telling her hairdresser that she's thinking of trying for a third child in the hope that she'll have a girl (she's expecting a boy). And then she goes on to say in Chinese:

"现在男孩子一定要读大学， 因为他们一定要赚钱养家。如果他们不能养家， 人家会讲他吃软饭。女孩子吖， 读到diploma就可以了。"

Translation: These days, boys will definitely have to get a university degree because they have to bring home the bacon. If they can't do that, people will say they're living off the woman. But for girls, getting a diploma is enough.

Needless to say, I was appalled and shocked by a woman in her 30s, who lives in Singapore, having such opinions in this day and age. I felt like asking her, 'What if your daughter doesn't marry well? What if your daughter doesn't even marry? What if your daughter ends up having to work after marriage? What if your daughter isn't pretty and can't even bank on her looks to get ahead?'

While a university degree is certainly no guarantee of big bucks and a stellar career (and who but me would know better...), it at least opens the door to more job opportunities and a higher chance of getting paid more - especially so in Singapore's civil service. More importantly, it gives women a means of financial independence. So while my degree hasn't made me 'successful' in most people's definition of the word, I'm still glad I have it and am grateful for the fact that I don't have parents who have such antiquated ideas about education.

Similarly I was rather taken aback by a Shanghainese friend of mine the other day. She had asked me about the demographics of the people in my translation and interpretation class and I told her most of them are female and the few men in the class are all much older than me - three of them older than my father. And the next thing she says is, 那你读来干嘛？ (Translation: So why are you taking up the course for?)

I mean, did she actually think I was taking up the course to meet men??? She's 28 and is really bent on finding a boyfriend this year (it's one of her new year resolutions), so everything she does is motivated by the fact that she wants to find a guy. It's probably why she can't understand why I'm taking up the course when it's not going to help me in my 'quest' of a partner. While I, for the life of me, couldn't fathom what she was thinking because I believe we should be learning simply because we want to improve and enrich ourselves as individuals.

So much for us living in Singapore, a developed - supposedly anyway - country.

The Third Party

在愛情的世界里， 不被愛的才是第三者。

When it comes to love, the third party is the one who isn't loved.

~ 犀利人妻第10集貼士 The Fierce Wife, Episode 10

I came across the quote (that's my English translation) while watching episode 10 of Taiwanese idol drama The Fierce Wife and thought it offered some food for thought.

Is it right to say that it doesn't matter who came first? What if the second was THE ONE? Is there such a thing as 'responsibility' towards the one who came first?

I say it's best to let the person go if his/her heart isn't with you any more. There's no point hanging on to someone if he/she is with you out of obligation or a sense of responsibility. It's like two birds trapped in a cage. Why not set the two of you free and go on to soar on your journeys? I think that's a better solution than being with someone who doesn't love you, no?

32

I turn 32 today. Thoughts? To be completely honest, not feeling great. Still finding direction in life, figuring out what's best for myself and steps to take me to where I'm going to be happiest. My 32nd birthday finds me in a trough in which I'm trying to get out of.

Making Friends

It's been awhile since I last updated - put that down to laziness and being uninspired. It's probably because I've lived in Singapore pretty much all my life and I'm so bored with everything here already. I don't take photos of new places anymore...something I did in Hong Kong every week. I think I'm suffering from reverse cultural shock. Perhaps it's also due to the fact that I've given up paddling. These days, I just go jogging alone at MacRitchie Reservoir. Next month, for lack of anything better to do, I'm taking part in a 50km walk with some friends. It'll be a walk that will stretch throughout the night and morning.

Anyway, I've found that it's really ironic that I met my friends in Singapore more often when I lived in Hong Kong as compared to now. When one lives abroad and comes home for visits, your friends usually make the time to meet you in the few days you're around. But when you've moved home, friends are all busy with work and other aspects of their lives and it's hard getting people to meet up.

For a singleton like me, there comes a point in time where one has to make new friends because many long-time friends have 1) moved away 2) gotten married 3) had babies 4) drifted apart 5) become too busy with work 6) hooked up with a new boy / girl.

So in a bid to find more people to hang out with and basically just to get out of the house, I've taken to finding interest groups through meetup.com. It's the same platform where I found people to hike with in Hong Kong and it's a great platform to meet people with similar interests. I've gone for outings organised by meetups such as Cantonese language, Organic living, Singapore Adventure & Nature Lovers etc. Even though I won't meet many of the people again, it's been interesting to meet new people I wouldn't meet otherwise. But really, making new friends gets harder the older one becomes.

I'm afraid when I think about what life will be like when I'm really old. The thought of being old, lonely, with no family and friends scares me. Am I the only singleton who feels this way?

Finding a Job is like Dating

If you haven't already guessed from the title of this blog entry, yes, I am looking for a full-time job right now. Well, perhaps let me rewind and recount what's been going on in my life so far.

So I quit my editorial job in Hong Kong and the idea was to return to Singapore - which I've done - to take up a course in lymphatic drainage massage and aromatherapy for six months while trying to get freelance editorial and writing work.

I've started on the lymphatic drainage course and find it very interesting, but unfortunately I also realise that I can't make enough moolah out of massage therapy and freelance writing and editing. Writing's a tough business and it's often a chicken and egg situation. People want to publish only writers that have been published. But how do you get published when you never get that break?

I had thought I had it all figured out. So I miscalculated this time and my leap of faith was a tad too big for my feet. I've fallen flat on my face and have been slapped with a reality check. So now I have to pick myself up and soldier on. And then I've been thinking about my financial status - or lack thereof. For someone my age, my bank account balance is pretty darn pathetic. My only consolation and silver lining is that I'm not in any form of debt. But I've been thinking more about grown-up stuff like buying a government flat when I turn 35. The Singapore government allows singles aged 35 and above to buy a small government flat. In order to buy one, I'd have to be employed on a full-time basis for the next three years else no bank would loan me any money when the time comes for me to be eligible to buy one.

I've reconciled myself to the need of being an office drone with a decent salary. I have too many interests (a bit schizo in that aspect) which I want to pursue and I need money to let me continue to fuel those interests. Hence the need for a full-time job as a worker bee. Lucky are the people whose work converges with their passion(s). Few of us have that merge and I think nine out of ten people will tell you they don't exactly LOVE what they do. Work so far has been more of a means to an end for me.

The other day, my friend, J, and I were chatting over MSN. Both of us are in the same situation at the moment in our respective homes. He's looking for work in Sydney after returning home from a three-month holiday in Europe. The job-hunting process is a tiring one and it's almost like a full-time job in itself! J then likened job-hunting to casual dating.

Think about it - both are actually pretty similar. When looking for a job, you have to go through interviews. Casual dating also requires you to answer questions posed by others and you're judged upon your answers in both situations. There are usually the standard set of questions and then your whole being and life are sized up by complete strangers based on this sketchy caricature they have of you.

Then let's assume the relationship goes beyond the casual dating stage and you start dating exclusively; in the case of the job, this equates to being recruited by the company. As with many relationships, it's not always rosy. Cracks start to appear and the relationship is nothing like what you thought it'd be. So you break up and then go on a holiday to nurse that broken heart and then the whole cycle starts again. Similarly with a job, many of us get bored after being on the job for awhile or find that it's not really what we want, and then we resign.

Job hunting, like dating, requires you to put yourself out there in the market. Finding the right job is like being in a relationship with the right person. If it's the right person, you wouldn't think of moving on or looking for something better. The lucky ones find that right person and/or job and make the rest of us - or maybe just ME - feel inadequate. J added that people like him have gotten burnt by corporate giants and are forever bitter about it - like people who have been hurt deeply by partners.

It's as if I've become a cynical bitch overnight. Last week, there was an article in The Straits Times about the 'Plasticine Generation' (橡皮人) in China. This refers to a group of white-collared workers, mostly in their late 20s and early 30s, who have become 'numb to life, have no dreams, interests or ideals, and do not feel much pain - or joy'. They are called the 'Plasticine Generation' because like plasticine, they can be or are moulded into any way that others want them to be - simply because these plasticine generation don't care in what way they are moulded or pushed along.

The article added that 'these "plasticine men" can be found among doctors, bank employees, teachers, journalists, traffic policemen, civil servants, actors and taxi drivers, the magazine reported. Typically, they work alone and for more than 50 hours a week. They feel as if they have expended all their energy and all they get in return is a sense of emptiness'.

While I'm not quite that close to having entirely no interests or ideals, I feel like I'm becoming a 'plasticine woman' in feeling trapped and confused in this world where I feel I'm losing my grasp on every single day. :(

I'm No Trust Fund Baby

I fear I may be giving readers the wrong impression that I don't work due to my exploits in Hong Kong. A recent blog comment asked if I worked, because he / she finds it rather incredible that I have the time to trek, eat and travel etc.

Yes, I do work - very much so. It's precisely for work that I'm in HK. Without work, I wouldn't be here. Without work, I wouldn't have the money to eat and travel. I, unfortunately, am no trust fund baby nor am I a rich tai-tai.

I work Mondays to Fridays and on weekends I make sure I get out and do something. I can't stay at home and do nothing. It drives me mad not doing anything at the weekend. When I move to a new place, I believe I should make the effort to know it as much as possible. This is precisely what drives me to go out and discover new places and do new things in Hong Kong every weekend. Imagine how many more things I'd get up to if I didn't work???

Perhaps I really do have more energy than the average person, which is why I always seem to be up and about. Maybe I have slight ADHD (attention deficit hyperactive disorder). Haha. There's nothing to envy about my lifestyle - it's actually really accessible to most people. It's just a matter of making the effort to get out there to do things. It might also involve making little sacrifices like getting up a little earlier to make more use of the day instead of sleeping in. Or bigger sacrifices like deciding to relocate to a new city and starting life anew, quitting a job, giving up some creature comforts, making do with (a lot) less money especially after a holiday. I don't make a lot of money so I travel on a small budget, I don't buy designer goods nor expensive facial products, I don't spend money going to pubs to drink or clubs to party. I guess it's usually only the surface that people see, but there is a lot beneath that they don't.

Age also isn't a barrier to many of the things I get up to. Trust me, many people whom I hike or paddle with are in their late 40s, early 50s and some are even in their 60s! There's a spritely 62-year-old man in my hiking group who can outrun people more than half his age. These people are such inspirations and I hope I'm just as active as them when I reach their age.

I believe life is about the accumulation of experiences and that's what drives me to go to new places, eat new foods and try new things. So really, don't let inertia set into your life. Life wouldn't be very fun that way!

The Spark Within You

As you grow older you will realise you are unique. When you are little, all kids want ice cream and Spiderman. As you grow older to college, you still are a lot like your friends. But ten years later and you realise you are unique. What you want, what you believe in, what makes you feel, may be different from even the people closest to you. This can create conflict as your goals may not match with others. And you may drop some of them. Basketball captains in college invariably stop playing basketball by the time they have their second child. They give up something that meant so much to them. They do it for their family. But in doing that, the spark dies. Never, ever make that compromise. Love yourself first, and then others.

~ Chetan Bhagat

I've been thinking a lot about dreams lately. No, not the ones you have in the deep of sleep, but the ones you have when you're wide awake. The ones where you picture yourself living a different life, travelling and wandering in faraway places, meeting people you'd never meet in your everyday humdrum life. About two months ago, a friend sent me the transcript of a speech given by Indian author Chetan Bhagat at the orientation programme for a new batch of MBA students at an Indian university. The quote above is an excerpt of it.

It's a paragraph that stands out because it reminded me to never let that spark within me die. The spark referred to in Bhagat's speech is that something that makes you excited and happy about life. That spark also has to do with one's goals and dreams. The friend who sent it to me is a bit of a dreamer herself. We've written to each other about our dreams and our musings about life. I've been thinking about my dreams and how to pursue the life I want. I'm not one of those fortunate people who could figure out early in life what is that they wanted to do. Actually I think most people are not doing what they REALLY want to do in life. Nine out of ten people I meet are not happy in their jobs. To most of us, a job is just a job. It's a means to an end - a means to put food in our stomachs and shelter over our heads.

I mean I could just be contented with doing what I'm doing now. I get a steady (though not fantastic) income and I don't really HATE what I'm doing. I mean it's OK, but I'm just not feeling fulfilled. There's always this tiny voice saying 'Surely there's more to life than this?? This can't be IT.' There's been a lot of self-reflection and self-questioning in the past couple of months. I don't want to be one of those people who moans and moans but not do anything about the situation. I've always been an 'action' person - I don't sit around waiting for things to happen. Friends sometimes say 'You're so lucky to have been able to work in London and Hong Kong. I wished I could do it too.' To which I answer, 'Well you could do it too. It's just that you're not willing to give up whatever you have in Singapore and take a leap of faith.'

It's not easy leaving one's comfort zone and the only difference is that I dared to do so. I actively pursued what I had always wanted, i.e. to work in another country apart from Singapore. The fact that it happened for me in London and Hong Kong wasn't due to chance. It didn't just fall from the sky and into my lap. It's something I chased and sought after, thus it's not something I'd attribute to luck. I've been thinking 'What next?' after Hong Kong. I have some ideas and I hope things will work out for me. It'll be another leap of faith which many others will find crazy and ridiculous. But heck, life's too short to care too much about what other people think. It's my life after all and I live the way I want it.

I've kind of made up my mind on my next step but it has to be said that it was not without a lot of wavering and considerations. However, I've been inspired by a few friends and acquaintances lately. One friend who used to be a programme executive dealing with the buying and selling of TV programmes is now a shiatsu massage therapist in the Netherlands. She's Singaporean Chinese but relocated to the Netherlands with her partner. Her partner is also pursuing his own dream of becoming a mountain bike guide by going for an instructor course in Scotland. How cool's that? On my most recent trip home, a friend announced that she intends to quit her job and go to Toronto to pursue a bachelor's degree in psychology. Her job as an engineer pays well but she admits that engineering was the 'safe' option for her when she was choosing what to study in university. Now she feels that she really wants to pursue something she's always been interested in, something that excites her. I was really happy to learn of her decision. I just hope she doesn't back down from it because of naysayers.

I have still yet another friend who's probably the bravest of all - she and her partner will be embarking on a cycling journey around the world, two Singaporean Chinese women out to pursue their dream on bicycles with video equipment in tow. Their dream is to chronicle, on video, the people around the world who have pursued or are pursuing their dreams. Follow my friend Tay and her partner Val on their journey here:

http://www.ibelievethatdreamscancometrue.com/

Their website address is really apt and what they're doing is very inspiring and brave. They'll probably be away for five to seven years and they'll be leaving in 14 days. In doing so, they'll be leaving behind family, friends and everything familiar. What they're about to do is the dream of many a person, but not many of us are brave enough to pursue it. Tay is a professional documentary producer and I'm sure whatever footage she gets at the end of her long journey will make for an extremely good story and programme. All the best to the both of them and kudos to them for their guts!

Anyway, I hope you, dear reader, can remember what your spark is. If you don't, perhaps it's time to reignite it.

Access the full transcript of Chetan Bhagat's speech here.

The Start of 2010

Scene from the hike at Clear Water Bay Country Park Trail

Let's start off 2010 with a picture taken from a healthy activity I partook in on Sunday 26 December 2009. That was the last hike I did for the year. The day before I had gone for another hike which took me through Stages 5 & 6 of the MacLehose Trail. I had convinced Slumbering Girl (who was visiting HK with her mum) to come along with me, but I think I killed her legs that day. I must commend her on her perseverance and give her a big pat on the back despite the hike being a difficult one for her. That said, at least we went up to two of Kowloon's nine peaks - Lion Rock and Beacon Hill (both about 495m above sea level).

I spent a few days in Singapore from 31 Dec - 3 Jan and it was nice being home for a short while. Managed to catch up with some close friends. As usual, I ate too much over the holiday season and now it's time to start buckling down to getting fit again and shedding some unwanted pounds. But right now I'm down with a nasty cold that has left me knocked out.

I don't know what's in stall for me in 2010 but let's hope it's a year full of adventure, family, friends, happiness and food! :)

2009 In Review

It's that time of the year again where it calls for reflections on the past year. Why is that time seems to pass at an exponential rate the older one becomes? Time is slipping by way too fast - there doesn't seem to be enough of it for me to chase the dreams I have in my head, to pursue those desires, to reach out to the stars that lie so far beyond.

I would say 2009 has been a memorable year marked by a big milestone - the relocation to Hong Kong. While it has had its ups and downs, it has been a good change nonetheless and something I need at this point in my life.

Other than that, the only other memorable thing for me this year was my trip to South Korea in May. Thoroughly enjoyed my first visit to the country. Great food, lovely scenery, clean, safe and interesting culture.

Next April I have Fukuoka to look forward to. Can't wait to visit Japan again! Other than that, maybe I should resolve to date more, or rather just to find people to date. Right now I can't even say I've gone on a bad date! Ha!

Tonight I fly home to Singapore for a few days. When I wrote that on my Facebook status, that I was heading home, one of my friends commented, asking where exactly is home for me??? I guess Singapore will always be home home, know what I mean? But I'm a bit of a restless soul, so who knows where I'll find myself in time to come?

Anyhow, here's to more adventures in 2010!

I Want to Travel Forever ... Sigh ...

"Is there anything, apart from a really good chocolate cream pie and receiving a large unexpected check in the post, to beat finding yourself at large in a foreign city on a fair spring evening, loafing along unfamiliar streets in the long shadows of a lazy sunset, pausing to gaze in shop windows or at some church or lovely square or tranquil stretch of quayside, hesitating at street corners to decide whether that cheerful and homey restaurant you will remember fondly for years is likely to lie down this street or that one? I just love it. I could spend my life arriving each evening in a new city."

~ Bill Bryson

I Want a Little Strawberry

Because it's Friday, here's a bimbotic blog entry for my lovely readers who are out there. Many thanks to those of you who dropped me a note to say you're still reading! :)

So you're probably asking what's with the strawberry? Well, a month ago I was watching this Taiwanese idol drama series (偶像劇) online. The drama series was called 败犬女王 and its English title was My Queen. As with all idol dramas, it's always about a romance between pretty boy and pretty girl. My Queen is about the romance between a 25-year-old guy, who's still studying to become a heart surgeon, and a 33-year-old career woman who works as an editor of a tabloid magazine.

One thing to mention about the series title is that, if the Chinese title were literally translated, it would actually be 'The Queen of Failed Dogs'. The term 败犬 (Bai4 Quan3) literally translates to 'failed dog'. 女王 means 'queen'. In Taiwan, 败犬 is used to refer to a woman who's still single after the age of 30. The term was 'imported' from a Japanese novel published in 2003 that referred to a beautiful, capable yet single woman (and with no prospectors in sight) above 30 as a 败犬. Like a stray unwanted by families, a 败犬 is discriminated against by society.

Well, as far as derogatory terms referring to singlehood go, this one has to be one of the most demeaning of all! I was very indignant after I learnt about it. Hey, at least being called a 'bitch' carries a modicum of spunk in its connotations. 败犬 is like a dog walking away in defeat and shame with its tail hanging between its legs. Hmmmpfff!

Anyway, the drama series is about the romance between this younger man and older woman. It's a well-written drama and single women over 30 can definitely identify with the issues faced by the female protagonist played by Cheryl Yang (楊謹華). The male protagonist is played by the oh-so-cute Ethan Ruan (阮經天) who has an impish smile that can melt all female hearts. He's currently the king of idol dramas by the way. His oh-too-perfect character is so sweet and I think the writers are just out to give us single women over 30 some hope and tell us not to write off younger men.

After a series of events and the female protagonist fighting off her own - and society's - resistance to the older woman-younger man romance, the two of them eventually get together. She endearingly calls him her '小草莓' (Little Strawberry). For those of you who don't know, the Taiwanese call people born between 1980 and 1991 the Strawberry Generation (草莓族) - an allusion to strawberries being fragile and getting bruised easily. Hence it refers to the fact that people born in that time period having been overly protected by their parents, and having grown up in a time of economic prosperity, they have never known hardship. They are thus unable to withstand pressure or endure hard work. So basically they are the kind of people whom you'd want to say 'Please harden the f**k up.' to.

But hey, if little strawberries came in the form of Ethan Ruan, please send me a crateful of them, thank you very much!!!!

Four Months Down

Friday night, and I've spent it alone in my shoebox-sized flat in Tin Hau. Had I been in Singapore, I'd be out with friends having great conversation over a delicious dinner. The feeling kinda sucks; I'm not very good at being alone these days. I guess I'm sick of being lonely. When I went back to Singapore for 1.5 days I was SO happy to be able to catch up with my closest friends and have deep, heart-to-heart conversations with them without afraid of being judged. How I miss that!

I guess thank god for Internet broadband where I can download episodes of "How I Met Your Mother" and "30 Rock", two of my favourite comedies. And thank goodness for online chatting which allows me to chat with friends back home.

The hardest part about relocating is really the building up of a social network again. I'm not Miss Social Butterfly or Miss Party Goer so I don't meet that many people. Hell, I haven't met anyone new in the past month or two. Also, being new, you just can't be someone's next best friend over night. Such things take time and sometimes I wonder if I'm strong enough to stick around that long.

Not taking into account the emotional side of things, I have to say I really love living in this city. I've always known I love it, but now I love it even more. Hong Kong really does have an immense charm of its own. There's always something dwelling in the small alleys and side streets waiting to be discovered. The food's fantastic in this city and there's good food catered to every budget.

I love the hiking and paddling, and the easy access to the scenic spots. Many people don't realise that Hong Kong is actually very beautiful. Did you know there are actually waterfalls on Hong Kong Island itself? Waterfalls, streams, rock pools etc...all waiting for the intrepid traveller to discover. The hiking and paddling are things I'm definitely going to miss when I leave Hong Kong.

In a few days' time, I'll have been in Hong Kong for four months. It's been a pretty good four months I guess. Work's been manageable (albeit I work overtime every day and I have to work tomorrow - on a Saturday morning) and colleagues are nice. Yet, I never feel I'm settled. The other day, my colleague asked me if there was any point in my life where I felt very settled, where you could tell yourself 'This is it. This is home.' I told her immediately that, no, I've never felt that way. I'm too restless a being. I guess I might feel settled if I have a partner and that's probably when I might have a sense of where home is. For me, home is where the heart is. Cliched but true.

No regrets in coming to Hong Kong though. I'm enjoying the change of environment and love discovering new places in the city. It's nice to be away from Singapore for awhile - makes me appreciate home more. Am getting more chances to practise my Cantonese as well!

Anyway, am just rambling and writing out some random thoughts here. Sorry if I sound whiny and repetitive, but writing is cathartic for me. And heck, no one really reads this blog anyway.

Have a good weekend everyone.

Life is a series of waves

A shot taken in Sai Kung, Hong Kong, during one of my hikes

I watched a Taiwanese idol drama recently (偶像剧) recently (fyi, best not to watched these too often as it really skews your idea of reality). 败犬女王 (My Queen) was about a romance between a younger man and older woman. More on that and the derogatory term (败犬) in another post!

Anyway, one of the things that stuck in my mind in one of the episodes was an analogy drawn about how life is like a series of waves. The male protagonist (played by the very cute Ethan Ruan) was writing a postcard from Hawaii, where he had gone surfing, to his best friend in Taiwan.

In his short message, he writes that at any one point, we must always have dreams and that we must work hard to pursue them. Working towards that dream(s) is an uphill struggle, just like riding up towards the crest of a wave. It's hard work, but we must keep at it - because when we achieve that dream, it's like reaching the crest of the wave where we are rewarded with a spectacular view and an amazing sense of rush when we surf that wave.

The analogy makes sense to me as I chase waves to surf when I paddle too. Surfing waves is the ultimate thrill of outrigger canoeing. I understand that thrill when riding a wave - it's such a liberating feeling. When that happens, it's just you and the water. For those brief moments, it's pure exhilaration.

The male protagonist goes on to say that once we have surfed that wave, the next one will follow and we continue finding that next crest just as we find our next dream to chase once we've achieved one. I love that analogy and think it's so true that it's important to have dreams. I've always been somewhat of a dreamer, following my heart instead of my head in most situations. In some cases, it hasn't served me well, but in most cases I think it has. So I'm happy being a heart-gal more than a head-gal. My good friends who are more realists than idealists, keep me in check most of the time. For that, I'm grateful.

I made a life's to-do list back in 2007. I reviewed it a few days ago and found that I've since managed only about 10 out of the 70 items listed there. That's pathetic. But I also realise that I want a new list now. Most of them involve travelling by the way. Haha. I can never get enough of travelling!

I'll be 31 in 11 days and about 40% of an average life span is already gone. I need to work a lot harder at chasing those waves and dreams! But sometimes it's like the older I get, the more I feel those dreams slipping away from me with time and finances not being on my side. Nevertheless, I will not throw out my dreams 'cos I think it's important to keep them in mind to remain motivated to live and discover.

To us dream seekers and wave riders!

If Only It Were That Easy

Image source: www.flickr.com/photos/moreinterpretations/

Yes yes, I'm still very much single and searching for Mr Right. The search now extends to Hong Kong. Haha. But to be honest, I haven't been very earnest in my search for Mr Right. Actually, I haven't been searching. Period. So I must admit that I don't exactly try hard enough. WHERE and HOW do you meet people without having to go to bars and clubs????

I suppose for the rest of us who aren't so lucky to have Mr/Miss Right fall from the sky through some serendipitous encounter, or have friends who hook you up with people, meeting people really does require some work. It's like looking for the perfect job, dammit.

I had been chatting online to several single friends on different occasions and was saying to them that it's lonely being in HK. But really, I feel this loneliness even in Singapore, it's just that the feeling's more acute in HK because I know fewer people here.

I've been single for far too long. While I do sometimes appreciate the ease in which I can make decisions about what I want to do without having to take into consideration someone else, I actually really want to be able to share my life with a special someone.

Monoceros and I sometimes wonder if we're in love with the idea of being in love. Perhaps. But hey, I think there's no shame in saying that we want to be with someone. I think it's taken me a while to come to terms with that admission. In the not too distant past, I'd have seen that as a sign of weakness. However, I think differently now and see it as simply human nature.

So to those of us still searching for love, may the message in the picture above come true for us!

Bliss

It's been awhile since I last updated about my life - for those interested in knowing, read on. Otherwise, skip this! Work, freelance work, and paddling have been the main things that I have been preoccupied with. I haven't had the time to really sit down and write, and I've been paddling quite a bit. People who don't understand why I love outrigger canoeing think I, and my teammates, are insane to be making our way to Sentosa's Tanjong Beach on Tuesday and Thursday mornings at 6 to paddle. We're out of the water by 7.45am and usually I'm off the island by 8.15am. After which I head to work. Morning paddles are so refreshing and what better way to greet the start of a new day than to see the sunrise as you paddle in the sea with a fresh, cool breeze blowing against your face? Such little pleasures in life are priceless.

The trip to Korea was FANTASTIC. Loved the food, got to meet up with a friend and made some new friends. More photos will continue from the previous two entries.

Well, speaking of little pleasures in life that are priceless, I now have to mention last Tuesday 16 June. That day will always be a special day for me and will be one of the most memorable days of 2009. It's been a long while since I've had such an absolutely wonderful day and on that day I could say I was truly happy. The day started out with a morning sunrise paddle which is always lovely. Instead of having to rush off after the paddle, I lingered around in Tanjong Beach as I had taken the day off. Monoceros and I had agreed to spend the morning and afternoon as beach bums.

The paddle finished at 8.15 and so I lay on the beach and waited for monoceros to turn up. While waiting, I revelled in the quietness and tranquility of the scene that lay before me. For once, the beach was pretty much empty save for a person or two who was walking along the beach or who had come for a morning swim with a dog. Still, it was a big difference from the beach I know at the weekend. Monoceros arrived at the beach at about 9.30am. She took a dip in the water while I lay on the beach to dry off from my morning paddle. At mid-day we walked to Palawan Beach's food court for lunch and then headed back to Tanjong Beach for more beach bumming. I swear I was born to be a beach bum.

Bliss is when there's a quiet beach lying in front of you with the morning sun kissing your skin with warm rays and the morning sea breeze caressing your face. Bliss is when you lie on the beach and look up at the everchanging fluffy white clouds floating past against the backdrop of a massive blue canvas. Bliss is when you hear nothing but the sound of waves lapping up the shore. Bliss is when you're spending a weekday as a beach bum when everyone else is in the office. Bliss is when you're stretched out on the sand with a book in hand. Bliss is when your best pal is lying beside you on the beach and the both of you are talking about anything and everything, laughing and lamenting together about life, men, love, movies, music, books, tan lines, hair, fashion, etc. Read monoceros's account of the day here.

Tanjong Beach may not be the nicest beach in the world, but it is a beach that is very special to me. I've spent countless hours there because of a sport (i.e outrigger canoeing) that I love and I've forged many friendships there as well. At 3.30pm, monoceros and I finally left Tanjong Beach. When we left the beach, I had transformed myself from beach bum to lady. I was wearing a dress and a pair of green high heels and had put on make-up. I then drove myself to One 15 Marina in Sentosa Cove where an ex-classmate from junior college was going to have his marriage solemnization ceremony. There were other ex-classmates in attendance and the wedding was an elegant, simple and intimate affair with only about 40 guests - very tastefully done.

At 8pm, I found myself at Pinchos, the bar and restaurant located at 8 Rochester Park. I was there to join my teammates for pub quiz night! I love pub quizzes. I love being tested on trivia - it's the nerd in me. Yes, my brain stores all sorts of useless information. The night was filled with good conversation and lots of laughter and I felt so blessed to have such great friends. I'm not the most sociable paddler on the paddling scene, but it's enough that I have this small group of paddling pals whom I can really call my good friends.

So yes, Tuesday 16 June 2009 was a day that was filled with many wonderful moments. It was a day that I felt truly happy and blissful especially when I was at the beach. It's one of those rare days when everything goes right and nothing in the world could spoil it. Such moments in life are truly rare and it's a day I'll always look back upon with fond memories. When monoceros and I left the beach, I think a tinge of sadness and nostalgia lingered in our hearts because we were both aware that it'll be a lllllooooonnnngggg time before we get to do something like that again. Why? Well, we'll both be starting new jobs and it'll be difficult finding time to do something similar in the near future. Tanjong Beach at the weekend is just not the same as Tanjong Beach on a weekday.

And oh, one more piece of news for the friends who read this blog and whom I've failed to inform - I'm relocating to Hong Kong for work come 2 August. It was decision that was made three weeks ago and things have been progressing fast in preparation for the move. On a personal and career level, this will be a good change for me and something that has come at the right time. It's something I need at this point in my life. Wanderlust is stirring again and I could do with a change in my social scene. Career-wise, it's also time for me to move on as where I am currently isn't a place I can, or should, stay for long. As monoceros wrote in her entry, "We're horses whose thirst for life and light and landscape is too seldom slaked." Indeed, I'm a bit of a wild horse.

Like a wild horse, the restless spirit in me needs to find new pastures to run and graze upon. DimSumDolly will be continuing her adventures in Hong Kong, the land of dimsum! Hooray! Wish me luck!

Been Plagiarised

I found out a few days ago that I had been plagiarised by a blogger. She had taken chunks of text from two blog entries I had posted last year and passed it off as her own on a recent blog entry of hers. She had used text from my posts Are You Happy? and Move On. More specifically, the following paragraphs.

As much as I'd like to say I am, by all accounts, happy, a stronger part of me wants to say otherwise. Perhaps it stems from the fact that I'm not finding meaning in what I do for a living. Yet, dropping everything to pursue something else is impossible. For me, there seems to be this eternal conflict or dilemma, which ever way you want to call it, between what I like and what actually pays a somewhat decent wage. I am afflicted by the constant inverse relationship of the two. I still can't quite figure out what path ahead I should trod.

I've been feeling down and demoralised of late, feelings primarily brought on by stuff that's been going on at work. When you suddenly suck at something you thought you were pretty good at, your confidence sinks to a new low; you're consumed with self-doubt and you can't seem to think properly anymore.

She had also put up the exact same lyrics from the song 'Move On' which I had posted on my blog. After the discovery of the misappropriation of my words, I left a comment on her blog saying I noticed that she has used some of my text in her blog entry and while flattered, I'd appreciate that I be attributed for it. I shall be nice this once and not put up the URL of the said blog so as not to turn this into a shame post. I checked in on her blog the next day after I posted the comment and discovered that she had written at the end of the blog entry 'Extracts from dimsumdolly'. In the process, she had changed her blog design to one that no longer had a field where readers could leave comments. Hmm.

Well, erm, should I say thanks for the swift action? I don't know, 'cos this really shouldn't have to happen in the first place. To this blogger and whoever is thinking of using someone else's words - it's NOT cool to pass off someone else's work as your own. True, I may be no academic, scholar or accomplished writer, but I don't like the idea of being plagiarised. In the academic or journalistic world, plagiarism is akin to career suicide. Yes, the things I blog about may not be considered as 'serious' publishing, but plagiarisim is fundamentally wrong.

I don't mind being quoted, but it has to come with proper attribution and not just 'Extracts from dimsumdolly'. I expect that you indicate exactly which text have been quoted and attribute accordingly. If you need help in proper referencing, please refer to the APA Formatting and Style Guide.

Thank you.

$1 a day

An American couple, both high school teachers, decided to try an experiment for a month - they wanted to see how they would fare spending only $1 a day per person on food.

For breakfast they survived on plain oatmeal every day. For lunch they had a peanut butter and jelly sandwich on homemade bread. Dinner comprised just beans, rice and tortillas. They couldn't afford fruits and vegetables and other fresh food.

The guy lost 14 pounds in 30 days and the lady said she felt 'tired and drained' and rather 'cranky' pretty often.

This is one experiment I wouldn't even bother to try 'cos I wouldn't even survive one morning! And realistically, it's not doable in Singapore. I can't see how really.

Watch their interview here.

Who I'd Like to Date

Tell me what you eat, and I will tell you what you are.

~ Anthelme Brillat-Savarin, The Physiology of Taste, 1825

Sui Mai's comment in my previous post made me understand why she married her boy – a durian-loving angmoh (the term used in Singapore for gweilo aka the Caucasian man) is definitely a keeper.

I mean something has to be said about an angmoh who likes durian, you know. I still don't quite understand how a fruit can elicit such extreme reactions from people. We love it here in Southeast Asia and at the same time it is like the poison fruit of the West. It's probably to do with some kind of mental and social conditioning. A durian-loving angmoh is likely to be someone who's adventurous, daring, and open to new ideas and things. All very endearing qualities.

I couldn't ever be someone who didn't enjoy or be adventurous about food. That would be too depressing. Even better if he were a discerning eater, i.e. someone who knows what's good and not good food. A discerning eater doesn't need to be someone with expensive tastes. There is good food that's cheap and there's expensive food that's bad; a discerning eater is one who's able to make all these distinctions with his/her palate. I don't profess to be an expert, but I do think I'm pretty good at making out what tastes good and what tastes bad.

I once ate with a German who thought chicken feet was disgusting. I didn't care – I still ordered it over dimsum and ate the whole portion by myself. Another time while talking to a Singaporean Chinese guy about food, he must have thought that I was a food snob at the end of our conversation. See, every restaurant or eatery which he said was good I thought was bad. I mean places like Shokudo, Curry Favour and Waraku are really not my idea of good food. The Japanese food at Shokudo and Waraku are, at most, edible and nothing to rave about. And he said the Japanese curry at Curry Favour was good – I think it sucks and I can cook better curry using the Golden Curry brand curry paste.

When I mention some restaurants (and approximate amounts one would need to spend) which I thought were good, he goes "That's pretty expensive." And I go, "But it's good!" I would pay for good food and a good experience at a nice restaurant. It's like going to a concert or theatre performance. The chef and wait staff are the performers, the food and service all part of the act. I go there for my stomach, palate and senses to be entertained. I guess he didn't see it this way.

His idea of being a foodie is to go only to hawker centres and kopitiams (a local neighbourhood open air coffee shop) to try different stalls. No, I have nothing against food at hawker centres or kopitiams. In fact, I eat there a lot. But if you're really into food, surely you would like to try out other types of food in restaurants once in awhile?

So Sui Mai, does your boy have any single eligible mates who love durian as much as he does? FedEx them over to me if he does! :p

How to Snag a Rich Man

Just because it's Friday and I feel like writing something bimbotic, I've decided to translate an article I read in the Chinese section of my paper 我报, the free morning paper, which I found very amusing. This article I'm translating first appeared on a China website (doesn't say which one) and is about six ways of snagging a rich man. These ways are based on the 80-episode Hong Kong blockbuster drama 珠光宝气 (Gem of Life) which is currently still showing in Hong Kong.

Two of the characters, played by Gigi Lai (黎姿) and Ada Choi (蔡少芬), scheme and worm their way into the hearts of the rich men they have set their sights on marrying in a bid to ensure they will live a life of luxury. I've no idea what the drama is about since I'm not watching it. My sis, though, tells me it's enjoyable as there are many twists and turns in the plot. So aspiring tai-tais, to marry rich or what we call 嫁入豪门 (jia4 ru4 hao2 men2) in Chinese, here are the six lessons you can glean from the drama.

1. Don't bother about the nice but poor guy 不理穷小子

Eddie Kwan's (關禮傑) character goes to jail for Lai's character, and Wong Hei's (王喜) character is the long-suffering dude who does everything in his ability to make Choi's character happy. But alas, they are poor and everything they do can never measure up to the riches that the two rich dudes the two women have their eye on possess. So nice guys finish last.

2. Arm yourself with some knowledge of the arts 要懂点艺术

Yes, it's a battlefield out there, so I use the word 'arm' instead of an innocuous 'Cultivate your knowledge'. So upper crust society is into the appreciation of arts and culture. As they say, birds of the same feather flock together. In order to develop the same plumage, you'll have to be able to wax lyrical - intelligently of course – about a painting as Lai's character does. Her ability to do so attracts Moses Chan's (陈豪）character, a rich man's scion, and makes him see her in a different light.

3. Listen to your mother 听妈妈的话

This brings us back to the old adage of obeying your parents. The matriarch, played by Louise Lee (李司棋), is the mother who, knowing that Kwan's and Wong's characters won't make good son-in-laws, schemes and plots to get rid of these two men – to great success. Thus, she clears the way for her daughters' path to taitai-dom.

4. Be able to endure a little suffering 吃得苦中苦

Well, you can't possibly expect everything to be so easy, can you? Take Choi's character for example. To gain the sympathy of the rich dude, she had to jump into a pool and climb a mountain cave. OK, frankly I don't know to what extent how hard that was since I didn't watch it, but I'm guessing it was merely physically exerting, which I suppose to a fragile flower vase IS torturous and constitutes suffering (苦)!

5. Don't appear too eager or easy 不投怀送抱

The phrase 不投怀送抱 literally means don't throw yourself into the arms of a man, i.e. don't appear too eager or easy to get. The logic here is that men want what they can't get, especially so for rich men who are used to getting what they want by using money. Rich men are used to women throwing themselves at them and actually find that women who are too eager a turn-off.

So then learn from Choi's character in starting off as friends first and just talking about things like family and kinship. Nothing too threatening you know. Even if you're very interested, never show your interest and never make the first move in making your feelings known. Just pretend to be blase, sweet and innocent, so as to pique his curiosity slowly but surely.

6. Be in the right profession 要找对工作

Look for a job that allows you to fraternise with high society – Lai's character is a sales person at a jewellery store; people who can afford to patronise the store are normally the rich and chichi set. Whilst Choi's character is a public relations officer who often has dealings with the upper crust.

So good luck to all aspiring tai-tais! Dimsumdolly is resigned to the fact that she'll never become one - not when she sticks around at home all day (so much so that her friend calls her 'old bird') and bothers to translates articles like that!

Old Bird

One of my teammates, D, whom I've gotten to know better this year, calls me an 'old bird'. She said she never knew what an 'old bird' I was until recently - actually just a few days ago - when she found out how old I actually was. She had thought I was the same age as she was, i.e. three years ago older, because I seemed so 'old'.

I think I've always been a little more mature for my age. When people my age frequent bars and clubs, I've disliked them from the very beginning, preferring quiet, sitdown dinners and gatherings with friends than downing beer in noisy, crowded clubs. I can count the number of times I've been to Zouk (THE club in Singapore) on both hands.

I'm a prude. I'm old-fashioned in some ways.

I dislike noise. I dislike people who act cute and squeal and have over-the-top reactions. It irritates me. I don't tolerate nonsense or bullshit. I hate it when people are wishwashy or flaky; like just make up your mind and get on with it already.

I'm also quiet in front of strangers. By all accounts and purposes, I could, and probably do, come across as an extremely boring person. My circle of good friends encompass only those whom I've gone to school or paddled with.

In other words, "Reclusive Old Bird" might be a more apt description of me.

Tissue Seller

The day before yesterday, I did something I seldom do - I bought tissue paper from a tissue paper peddler. I've said 'No' numerous times to peddlers at hawker centres, kopitiams and walked past many who sit at the side of the road waiting for some kind soul to buy three or four packets of tissue for $1.

Many of those who sell them are either underprivileged or handicapped in some way or another, yet many of us brush them off. I'm not sure why or how most of us got into the habit of turning these people away when they're trying in their own small way to earn a meagre living. Was it because the government sent out some mandate saying that we shouldn't buy from these people so as to discourage them from selling tissues???

However, on Tuesday while exiting the MRT station on my way to meet a friend at Toa Payoh's HDB Hub, I couldn't bring myself to walk away from an old blind woman who was standing just outside the doors leading into the station. With her cane in her left hand and the right hand grasping some $1 coins in the palm while holding on to three packets of tissue in the same hand and a big full of tissue packets on the right wrist, the white-hair woman was standing forlornly in a corner with the peak hour crowd rushing past her, oblivious to her presence.

For some reason, the sight of her broke my heart and I don't think I could have forgiven myself had I walked away without buying the tissues. When I went up to her and asked how much the tissues were, she said to me in Chinese, "你要跟我讲话我才知道你在，因为我看不见." (You have to talk to me for me to know you're here because I can't see.)

Of all the senses, I think sight is the worst one to lose. It's so difficult to do anything without being able to see. So much of the world's beauty and colour is lost. So much literature is out of reach.

I guess from now on, I'm going to tell myself wherever possible, help. Seriously, I haven't been the most charitable person and perhaps it's time to change that. Doesn't matter if I end up with packs of tissue; will just use it to "chope" seats at food courts and hawker centres. Hee.

Are You Happy?

I stumbled across the Are you happy? series yesterday and have since been quite taken with the column. Why oh why doesn't any Singapore paper come up with such brilliant ideas for columns? Instead, Singaporeans are tortured into reading crappy columns written by wannabe sports presenter Jamie Yeo and wannabe pop star Maia Lee (from the first Singapore Idol) which always seem to delve on ex-boyfriends and the like. I read two articles written by each one of them, and swore never to read another.

So anyway, high quality journalism is one of the reasons why I read papers like The Guardian and the New York Times even though I don't live in the UK or US. You see, even when they write about fluff, it's good fluff they write. If I could but write a fraction as well as some of their journalists do, I'd be over the moon. Anyway, I'd like to pretend that I'm going to be published in The Guardian and take my own stab at answering the eternal question - 'Are you happy?'

Jxxx xx, undecided being

As much as I'd like to say I am, by all accounts, happy, a stronger part of me wants to say otherwise. Perhaps it stems from the fact that I'm not finding meaning in what I do for a living. Yet, dropping everything to pursue something else is impossible. For me, there seems to be this eternal conflict or dilemma, which ever way you want to call it, between what I like and what actually pays a somewhat decent wage. I am afflicted by the constant inverse relationship of the two. I still can't quite figure out what path ahead I should trod.

However, happiness is also about moments in time. I feel happy when I'm paddling out at sea in an outrigger canoe. It's blissful when it's just me, the water and the sun, away from the city bustle.

I feel happy when I'm enjoying good food and conversation with a bunch of good friends or my family over a casual meal that does not reek of pretension and pomposity.

Happiness is also when I stumble upon a good book in the library whose pages are so new it still smells freshly minted. Happiness is when I read a piece of good writing.

Happiness is when you're in love; when you know that there is someone interested to hear about you talk about your day even if it sounds mundane and lame to the rest of the world. It's a feeling that went as quickly as it came a long while ago and I struggle to remember it.

But until I really find myself, I'm afraid I'll always remain ambivalent about my state of happiness.

Your Label

In some way or another, all of us are defined by what we do for a living. Unfortunately, not many of us like the label being slapped upon us. 99.9% of the people I know or meet (myself included) wished they were something else – tragic but true. While surfing The Guardian website, I came across some interesting labels some people had given themselves in a series called Are you happy?; one look and you know that these are people who love what they do or are just comfortable in their own skin.

Here are some cool labels:

Bubbleologist (Blowing bubbles - sounds like real fun!)
Body Percussionist (My tummy is so big it looks and sounds like a drum when I slap it - perhaps I qualify)
Dog Behaviourist (Erm, I can be quite a bitch. Does that qualify?)
Retro Enthusiast (Hmm...I like retro too...but how to make money ah?)
Bon Vivant (What a delightful label!)
Amateur Astronomer (the only constellation I know is the belt of Orion...)
Vineyard Owner (Yes, feed me some wine)
Convert (Can't quite figure this one out - I'll have to read the article)
Glider (Don't know what this is about)
Tree Surgeon (Haven't inherited green fingers from my mum, so maybe not)
Poet (Not lyrical enough - I'll leave this to good friend Monoceros)
Protester (Later I kena arrested by Singapore gah-men then how?)
Ice cream vendor (better not - I might eat myself poor, not to mention fat)
Curler (NO idea what this is)
Human Statue (I'm too restless a person, so no go)
Life Model (Does that mean getting paid for just posing for artists and photographers? If so, I want. But I guess I'm not pretty enough!)
Chainsaw Carver (Er, maybe not. I might end up hurting myself, the klutz that I am)
Rural Tourism Adviser (Forget it - no such thing as "rural" in Singapore)
Pipe Aficionado (Sounds cool if these are musical pipes we're talking about)
Asparagus Grower (Ooh yes, I'd love to be a part-time farmer!)
Antique Clock Restorer (It's a cool job to be able to turn back time)

The labels that I would like for myself in an ideal world would probably be all these:

Food and travel writer
Epicurean
Traveller
Optimist
Hedonist
Taitai
Horse Whisperer
Dog trainer
Daughter
Sister
Friend
Wife
Mother

And what is/are your label(s)?

What Life Gives

I've been watching the American sitcom How I Met Your Mother which I absolutely love and in the last episode of the second season, the character Ted narrates a voice-over, saying this about life:

"For the most part, when you know what you want out of life, life often gives it to you."

I'd like to believe it, but as the years go by, I find it harder and harder to believe. Maybe I'm just a cynic. Or it could be that I'm too idealistic. Maybe I'm not looking in the right places. Maybe I'm not looking hard enough. Maybe I'm somehow not doing the right things. Maybe I'm not meeting the right people.

Maybe dreams are meant to remain as dreams. Maybe it's just not meant to be.

If It Rains On a Weekday Morning

There should an employment law stating that people should be allowed to do one of the following if it rains heavily on a weekday morning:

a. Sleep in and not go to work (my most preferred option of course)
b. Work from home
c. Wait till the rain stops before heading out of the house

I don't like rainy mornings!

Dreams Reflect Reality

You know how they say dreams are a reflection of one's life? Last night I dreamt that I missed a flight to Beijing. Don't ask me why Beijing - I put it down to the fact that I used to travel to Beijing in my previous job.

In my dream, I remember that my flight was supposed to be scheduled at 11.38 (maybe I should buy 4D using this number today). But at 10.50 I was still in the taxi and in a frenzy. I even got the taxi to go to the wrong airport terminal and forgot to take my luggage as I got out at Terminal 1. The taxi driver was running after me with my baggage in tow as I was at the counter check-in and was told that I was supposed to be at Terminal 2 instead. So I rushed back to the taxi and got to Terminal 2, only to be told that I was too late for check-in.

I attributing this dream to the fact that I know I'm going to have a stressful week ahead. I have lots of editorial deadlines to meet and it's all dependent on people getting information to me. I hate it that I'm in no position to do anything sometimes. If they don't send me the information, I'm screwed. Chasing them doesn't seem to help in them disseminating the information. Bleh.

Restless

Thank you to all who left comments on the blog, sent me emails and sms-es to ask about my family. Things are better and my dad's recuperating at home.

Anyway, so I was watching the National Day Rally speech and as always, there's the singles and baby issue. I'm one of those problematic singles whom the Government is trying to pair up and procreate to sustain the economy. It's true, though, what PM Lee said, most singles actually do want to get married, but somehow finding that special someone seems to be an elusive search. Like seriously, WHERE can one go to meet men?

Don't tell me from paddling, 'cos I've been paddling for so many years and I've never met anyone. Dragonboat competitions though, especially international ones, are great venues for ogling at fine specimens of the male species. Us girls had so much eye candy in Penang that we were going delirious from seeing rippling muscles everywhere we looked. *faint* OK, I'm starting to sound like Carrie Bradshaw sans the glamour, high fashion and even higher Manolos. I shall stop.

Well, as I'm still searching, good friend olduvai sealed her marriage vows with her R, who also happens to be monoceros' bro, in a lovely and simple ceremony that took place at Brown Sugar restaurant. So happy for them!!! Am glad that monoceros and I had a part in bringing the happy couple together!

In other random musings, I had decided, very bravely, two weeks ago that I wanted to take part in a full marathon at the end of the year. I thought, why not, new challenge, and it would force me to run even though I'm not exactly very fond of running such long distances. But having done the half-marathon before, there was no good reason for me to do the 10km - I mean, we should be progressing and not regressing! And another good reason to run the full marathon is that I get to participate for free as a member of staff (OK, so now you can probably guess which company I work for), saving me $80+. So anyway, I was really gungho the other day and proceeded to register myself on the company intranet site. But alas, my employee ID was not recognised by the system! Maybe it's the heaven's way of telling me that I should just stick to paddling and not attempt such running feats!

On the food side, I ate at Ku recently, the Japanese restaurant at Intercontinental Hotel. Great food, great service, lovely ambience. I'll have to get the pictures from my cousin. And by the way, I love the revamped Bugis Junction basement - so much food and snacks! I feel like I want to eat everything.

I've also been sussing out lunch places around Raffles Place. I think I'm going to start chronicling my lunch adventures for lack of anything else interesting to write. I feel like I'm starting to become a very boring person. How ah???? Need to do something!!!

Suggestions welcome.

Mood: Restless

Wanderlust

I've become some kind of traveling salesman or paid wanderer, both blessed and doomed to travel this world until I can't anymore. Funny what happens when your dreams come true.

It's an irritating reality that many places and events defy description. Angkor Wat and Machu Picchu, for instance, seem to demand silence, like a love affair you can never talk about. For a while after, you fumble for words, trying vainly to assemble a private narrative, an explanation, a comfortable way to frame where you've been and what's happened. In the end, you're just happy you were there – with your eyes open – and lived to see it.

~ Anthony Bourdain in The Nasty Bits

When I read what Bourdain wrote in the introduction of his book The Nasty Bits, I knew exactly what he meant (by the way, I would LOVE to do what he does). In fact, I had written to a friend just a couple of days back, which touched on the same subject.

"Yes, I know what you mean...there always seems to be something else to do and see. The world isn't small enough for people like us! I think having a curiosity about the world is both a blessing and a curse. That curiosity makes you a more worldly person...you become more sensitive to and aware of cultural differences...it spurs you on to want to learn more about the world, people.

Yet, this wanderlust stirs this constant restlessness which is not altogether healthy. Being 'settled' has its bliss too."

The words sum up the situation I'm facing right now with my life. How do I reconcile my love for travelling with a job that makes me bound to Singapore all the time? It's not that I don't like being based in Singapore. I do like it. It's an easy place to live in. I've tried living abroad and it didn't quite do it for me 'cos I felt too lonely. I told myself that if I'm ever going to relocate again, it'd have to be with a partner (boyfriend/husband/de facto/whatever). I figured I should have tried out being a flight attendant years ago. But since that's not a career option right now, I just have to contend with occasional holidays out of Singapore. Why couldn't Singapore be bigger????

So my wanderlust has stirred again and I'll be in Australia from 19 June to 2 July. From the 19th to 22nd I'll be in Hamilton Island to take part in the Hamilton Cup, which is an outrigger canoe race. Am looking forward to ogling at all the hotbods at the race. Hee.

After the race, I'll be in Sydney from 23 June to 2 July to catch up with family and friends. I know, it's the umpteenth time I'm visiting Sydney, but I love returning to this beautiful city which is very special to me. There's always a sense of comfort returning to a city that one knows well.

I've also booked myself on the A380 to experience what flying on the jumbo jet is like. OK, I'm not in the first-class suite but I'm after a cheap thrill. Heh.

Anyway, am always glad to go back to the land of Oz with its lovely beaches, great people, and delicious food!

Phone On Right

Have you ever noticed how, when some people answer their mobile phones with their left hand (because their right hand is occupied), they have to put their left arm across their face to hold the phone at their right ear?

I can never quite understand why people do this involuntarily because don't you think it is a very awkward action? I do it at times and after I put the phone down, I always wonder why I didn't put it at my left ear where it would be more comfortable and less awkward a pose. And it's not as if I can hear better on my right ear!

I can't understand why it happens. Do you?

Settling

It always fascinated me how people go from loving you madly to nothing at all, nothing. It hurts so much. When I feel someone is going to leave me, I have a tendency to break up first before I get to hear the whole thing. Here it is. One more, one less. Another wasted love story. I really love this one. When I think that it's over, that I'll never see him again like this... well yes, I'll bump into him, we'll meet our new boyfriend and girlfriend, act as if we had never been together, then we'll slowly think of each other less and less until we forget each other completely. Almost. Always the same for me. Break up, break down. Drunk up, fool around. Meet one guy, then another, fuck around. Forget the one and only. Then after a few months of total emptiness start again to look for true love, desperately look everywhere and after two years of loneliness meet a new love and swear it is the one, until that one is gone as well. There's a moment in life where you can't recover any more from another break-up. And even if this person bugs you sixty percent of the time, well you still can’t live without him. And even if he wakes you up every day by sneezing right in your face, well you love his sneezes more than anyone else's kisses.

~ From the film 2 Days in Paris

I was chatting with a friend online the other day and she told me she and her boyfriend were making plans to get married. Usually I would be thrilled if I knew that my friend was going to marry the love of his/her life. But for this friend, I didn't offer my congratulations straight away. My questions to her were: Are you really happy? Are you sure you're not just settling?

The reason for my questioning was that, as of late last year, she had admitted to me that she didn't love him enough. True, they got along well enough, having been pretty good friends for a long time before they got together, but she had never experienced feelings of passionate love with him. I guess different relationships work differently so maybe some people don't need that kind of love. But I sensed that she would like to have that, having experienced those feelings before with a few boyfriends who had come before him.

But she said to me that she didn't want to look anymore. He loves and cares for her, and he's a really nice and stable guy. She said she liked that about him, having had boyfriends who were flighty and non-committal. She then sent me the quote above from the film 2 days in Paris, and said sometimes one just gets used to having the other person around.

Perhaps it's too presumptuous of me to conclude that she's 'settling', but I would say that's the feeling I get from her. Perhaps her feelings have changed in the past six months. But what am I to conclude when she sends me that quote?

While it's tempting to settle so you can revel in the comfort that there'll be someone there, feelings of being trapped and stifled may surface in time to come. And if you can't give yourself to someone heart, body, mind and soul, the other party will sense it eventually and could possibly leave you some day too.

Another friend of mine has advised me never to settle as it only brings emotional suffering in the long run. She says this based on personal experience. She married someone who loved her but whom she didn't love back to the same degree because it was, as she said, 'the safe option'. He was the kind of guy you would take back to your parents – stable, stable, stable. She also never thought she would be able to find someone she would be crazy about. But eventually she began to feel trapped because she didn't love him enough, and now she has decided to get out. I believe it's for the better.

I may be cynical about many things, but when it comes to love I'm still quite the hopeless romantic. I can't give myself to someone I don't love or care enough about. It wouldn't be fair to myself nor the other party. I don't ever want, and won't, settle.

I can't.

Dog-earred

Are you a dog earer? Er, what's that you say? OK, let me come again - are you someone who dog ears your books? You know, you fold the corner of the page down to indicate that's the point at which you've stopped.

If you are, DON'T do that to my books if I should lend you any, 'cos I hate my books being dog earred. I just can't stand unnecessary creases on pages and whenever I see a page being dog earred, I have this compulsion, need, to undo the fold. It's like some obsessive compulsive disorder. I just can't stand it. I think the folds spoil the look of the book.

Being a book lover, I have a certain respect and reverence for books. I believe they, like humans, should be treated well. It annoys me when I see library books, which are public property, being abused and mishandled. People who treat books like that are inconsiderate as they are destroying information and knowledge that can be passed on to someone else.

Anyway, this rant came about because the book I borrowed from the library, Anthony Bourdain's The Nasty Bits, had many pages that were dog-earred and it just irked me!!! The book, by the way, is great! I love Bourdain's brashness in his collection of essays. Am half-way through and can't wait to get till the end of it.

Bittersweet

It suddenly came across to me that the word ‘bittersweet’ can be associated with the taste of food or moments you come across in books, plays, reel and real life.

When it comes to food, I like the bittersweet taste of dark chocolate, durian and matcha ice cream. I’m a bit of a chocolate snob – it’s dark chocolate for me or not at all. I don’t bother wasting calories on milk and white chocolate, which technically isn’t chocolate since it doesn’t contain any cocoa! Bittersweet dark chocolate is like a dark mysterious person – it’s more interesting. Instead of a flat sweet taste, the bitterness of cocoa dances on your tongue and stimulates your taste buds to savour more of its taste. As for durian, I like pulp that’s sweet with bitter notes. Matcha ice cream is the same. It's hard to find good matcha ice cream which strikes the right balance between the full-bodied bitter taste of matcha with the amount of sugar called for in the recipe. I'm still on that perfect matcha ice cream quest.

But when it comes to life, bittersweet moments often weigh more on the sad rather than happy side of the scale. There’s always an intense sense of poignancy to the moment, often accompanied by a tinge of regret and sorrow. Yet, one is also thankful for the experience, because you’ve matured and learnt from it, and now possess greater depth of character.

When bittersweet moments appear in reel life, you can’t help but let out a sigh and maybe find your eyes moisten at the poignancy of it all. It is often these films which leave you thinking and reflecting. It is also these films that have heart.

So what’s your favourite bittersweet food and your best bittersweet moment?

Living a Song

I watched the film La Vie En Rose last night and was impressed by Marion Cotillard's portrayal of the legendary French singer.

In one scene, a young Edith Piaf is admonished by her mentor Raymond Asso for not living the song she was singing. He picked on her bad articulation, her stiffness and her lack of emotion. To be a good singer, he told her, one had to live the song; to be able to put yourself in the mind and soul of the song. If you haven't actually experienced the situation depicted in the lyrics, you would have to be an actress and think like the character.

I was then led to think of the msn conversation I had with monoceros the day before. She had emailed me a very beautiful song by Linda Eder called Why Do People Fall In Love. She told me she had found her eyes turning moist while listening to the song. This sad song with a tinge of hope had the same effect on me.

Ten years ago, we wouldn't have had this reaction to the song. But with age and the life experiences that come with it, we could identify with it. The lyrics and the emotion put into the song by Eder resonated with us. Eder lived the song. One can feel the emotions flowing through in the cadence and lilt of her voice accompanied by the simple tinkling of the piano keys and strains of violins in the background.

There are songs which can only be sung by people who have passed a certain age or have been through particular situations. It's because it is only with age and experience that the songs come alive. I can understand when the judges on American Idol comment that a contestant has picked a song that is 'too old' for him/her. Most of these teenage contestants lack the life experience that many of the songs they choose to sing are trying to depict. Their youth is no fault of theirs – it's just that it prevents them from bringing out the pain and emotional depth of the lyrics. The delivery may be technically perfect, but the song still feels empty.

Edith Piaf eventually came to realise what her mentor meant and went on to become one of the greatest French singers. Her tumultuous and tragic life added much emotional depth to her voice and delivery of her songs. I guess that is why her audiences were mesmerized. When a singer or musician is able to do that, it's akin to a sorcerer at work where a spell is being woven round the audience who are bound captive by this magic. I would be a willing prisoner in such situations.

Why Do People Fall In Love

Lyrics: Jack Murphy

Why do people fall in love?
Don't we know love is full of dangers?
Letting loose our foolish hearts
In this world full of perfect strangers
Maybe this time you will find
The moon will treat you kinder
Yes, I'm sure that I recall
That's the reason people fall...

Love is needing to belong
Right or wrong, when you feel the fire
Love is living in mid-air
Young and rare, on a sky-high wire
Hoping this time it will last
You feel your heart beat faster
Yes, I'm sure that I recall
That's the reason people fall in love
Taking chances you would never take
When wide awake, you risk it all
Half afraid he'll only break your heart
Still you will close your eyes and simply fall

Why do people fall in love?
Are we fools with no hope of winning?
Or perhaps we always see
One last chance for a new beginning
Holding on and letting go
But never really knowing
Well, I guess that after all
That's the reason people fall in love

Un-PC Career Advice

I went for an interview recently for an adjunct teaching position at an educational institution here. Basically the job involved delivering a programme set out to help students preparing to enter the workforce by teaching them to write CVs and conduct themselves during a job interview.

One of the questions my interviewer asked was how I would motivate unmotivated students. After all, I'd only be seeing them once and it'd be difficult to get to know them. Well, of course I said the politically correct thing. That is, talk and reason with them like adults, get them to see that this is for their own good, and try as much as possible to share my own experience.

The real answer swimming inside my head was, 'Sod them'. Ha. I'm only interested in helping people who want to learn and help themselves. Anyway, the young and impetuous will learn the folly of their ways in time to come. The lessons from the School of Hard Knocks will be the best ones they'll ever receive and the ones they'll remember for life. Some things have to be learnt and not taught.

But if they wanted career advice, here's what I have to say. If you want the money, go into finance, banking, business or accountancy. There are no other pots of gold to be found at the end of other rainbows.

For the girls, if you want easy and good money, take to the skies - be the Singapore Girl. Put on the kebaya which clings to the body like cellophane, coif your hair, slap on the hedious peacock blue eyeshadow and fire engine red lipstick, and then zip around the world. While you're at it, find some high-flying jetsetter executive husband who works in an MNC. Then at the end of your five-year tenure, get a nice bonus payout and retire to be a taitai.

Boys, don't despair. If you aspire to be the male version of a taitai, start taking up dance classes. Not just any dance class mind you. It has to be latin or ballroom dance. Master those steps and keep yourself looking fit and trim, and soon you'll have mega-rich taitais knocking on your door, asking you to dance the Argentinian and horizontal tango with them.

And don't tell me you don't want a desk-bound job 'cos it's so boring. I'm sorry to tell you that whatever you're going to do (unless it's one of the two vocations above) at executive level and above, there's always going to be some part, if not all, of the job that's going to be desk-bound. There's always going to be a need to be seated in front of a computer and there's always going to be paperwork to be processed in some form or another.

As you may have guessed by now, I didn't get the job. Hahaha.

Q 感

I've been hearing the term 'Q 感' a lot when I watch Chinese programmes about food. Literally translated, it means 'Q feel'. I don't know who came up with this 'cos I had no idea that a single alphabet could now be used to describe food.

People interviewed at the food places keep saying, '它吃起来很Q' or they go '它很有Q感' – It tastes very 'Q' / It has a lot of 'Q feel'.

From what I can fathom based on the food these people are using the term to describe, Q 感 is used to describe something that's rather chewy and springy in texture when you bite into it. Think foods like 汤圆 (tang yuan or sweet glutinous rice dumplings) where a good one has skin which contains a hint of springiness. Another example I can think of is muah chee or in Japanese mochi. Can't think of others at the moment...maybe you might want to let me know what others you can think of.

Feel free to correct me if I'm wrong in my definition, but honestly, can we like use proper words and adjectives already???

Singapore Flyer

So the Singapore Flyer officially opens today. I don't know about you, but I'm really not that excited about it. I wouldn't pay $29.50 to go on it for 30 minutes. If I wanted to have a good view of Singapore, I'd rather go to Equinox or New Asia Bar in Swisshotel. I mean, at least I get to have a drink!

But seriously, I don't know what's there to see. There aren't any world famous landmarks to see unlike going up the London Eye where you can spot Big Ben, the Gherkin, St Paul's, Tower of London etc.

I just feel like it's going to be another white elephant once the novelty has worn off. Perhaps I would feel differently about it if I were a tourist. But as someone born and bred here, I would rather spend $29.50 having a good meal.

Am I the only one who feels this way?

Going the Distance For Food?

An article that appeared on the ChannelNewsAsia website reported that 56 per cent of Singaporeans are willing to travel an hour or more to their favourite eateries, according to a study by a group of students from Meridian Junior College.

However I'm highly sceptical about the accuracy of this study because one of the paragraphs writes: 'The students asked more than 100 Singaporeans a list of food-related trivia questions.'

Maybe this could be a case of bad journalism, but seriously, does 'more than 100 Singaporeans' tell you anything about the sample size and hence accuracy of the study? I hate it when I read such phrases in news articles, i.e. more/less than x number. It hardly stands for accuracy which is something of utmost importance in journalism.

So what's 'more than 100 Singaporeans' supposed to mean? 101 people? 200? 1000? 10,000? Someone please enlighten me. I think such writing is sloppy. I would rather the word 'about' be used. At least it gives readers a more approximate idea of the numbers we're looking at.

With that scepticism already in place, I go on to read that 'the study also found that the eastern part of Singapore is a food-lover's paradise, with the highest concentration of acclaimed eateries in East Coast, Changi Village, Bedok and Geylang.'

Hmm...does anyone out there want to beg to differ? I wouldn't call myself a Miss Know-It-All when it comes to food in Singapore, so I'd really like to know what these 'acclaimed eateries' are and what critiera must it have to become 'acclaimed'?

Anyway, if the study is to be believed, I'm not in the 56 per cent 'cos I'm too lazy. Having to spend that amount of time to get somewhere in a small place like Singapore just means it requires too much effort. And if I did do it, that food had better be damn good!

Hate Hotpot

Friends are always perplexed when they learn that I don't like to eat hotpot (火锅) or what is popularly known as steamboat in Singapore. Yes, I just can't see the allure of it no matter how hard I try. Here are the reasons why not.

1) It's too hot in Singapore to enjoy sitting in front of a steaming pot of broth. It's worse if it's a spicy (麻辣) broth. OK there's aircon in the restaurant, but I still find it too hot. I would only enjoy it in the throes of winter, which is something that will never happen in Singapore. I don't like perspiring when I eat.

2) The variety of food available here is pathetic. If I really have to have hotpot, I'm only going to have it in Hong Kong where there's a great variety of broths and food to choose from. There are also more condiments that are available to concoct your own dipping sauce, e.g. sesame oil, peanut sauce, fried garlic, fried ginger, fried shallots, chilli oil, fresh red chilli, chilli flakes, spring onions, XO sauce, etc. The quality of food in Singapore just doesn't quite match up to what I've had in Hong Kong.

3) I don't like cooking my own food when I go out to eat. When I dine out it's because I want to eat something that someone else whom I think is a more competent cook to cook for me. I honestly don't see any fun in preparing food for myself unless I'm actually preparing a homecooked meal. I want to see and savour the chef's skill. I want to be impressed and wow-ed.

So please don't suggest having hotpot if you're going to dine out with me here. I might go to the restaurant just 'cos everyone else wants to eat it, but I wouldn't eat. It's true – I sat out a dinner last night and spent the entire time drinking tea and chatting with my friends while they ate. Of course, I had the good sense to have my own dinner before joining them. OK, call me a hotpot/steambot snob or whatever, but I'm not having it in Singapore!

Growing Pains

I remember when I was in Secondary 4 my form teacher asked us what our ambition was and one of my classmates said 'housewife'. I remember feeling incredulous when I heard it and thinking, 'Huh? You mean THAT'S an ambition??? Whatever happened to all that we were taught – that we were confident young women capable of doing and achieving whatever we wanted? We were definitely not placed on this planet to be mere housewives!'

I don't know if monoceros, fatgirl or vantan remembers this incident. We were all in the same class in Secondary 3 & 4. Monoceros was my desk partner (we sat in pairs) for two years and vantan was sitting just behind us. Overacuppa was in another class so she wouldn't have known about this. As you can see, we all go back a long way!

But that was my 16-year-old self. Now on the cusp of 30 and entering a new decade of my life which marks another crossroad, I now think that was such a brilliant plan. That classmate, by the way, is now a high-flying accountant who is happily married. Pretty far-off from her then plans.

It may not be the most ambitious of ambitions, but I don't think any credit should be taken from being a housewife since it's not easy running a household, especially when one doesn't have any help from a domestic helper.

My before-20 self was filled with the vision that I'd go to uni, have a good career, get married and have a family by my late 20s etc...you get the picture. Evidently, reality has turned out very different. Reality is, as I've come to realise over the years, also not so smooth sailing and rose-tinted. But OK, it's not like I really want to be a housewife. No, actually what I want is to be a taitai. Hahaha.

Lucky are the people who manage to figure out what they want in life early on in their lives. Many, including myself, take a longer time and are probably still searching. I wonder if the many 'settled' people I see have chosen their path because they actually wanted it or is it more of the fact that circumstances chose them and they just went along with whatever was 'safest' and most 'right'.

A friend of mine messaged me over msn the other night and said he was envious of my current lifestyle 'cos I was still up at 1plus in the morning and I wouldn't have to worry about turning up for work on time the next morning. He said it was the next best thing to being a taitai. My reply to that was that that's so not true!!! 'Cos unlike a taitai, I constantly have to worry about money.

Of course, I'm nowhere near what most would consider 'successful'. I don't earn a lot and many people younger than me are earning heaps more than I do. Often, I can't help but compare myself to my peers and invariably, one tends to measure one's self against the monetary and career success of others.

I guess the important thing to remind myself is that everyone's different and that we all have our own paths to tread. I've made decisions that, for better or for worse, have given me different experiences, led me to this juncture in my life and made me the person that I am. At this point in time, I'm still figuring out and exploring options with regards to the future.

Who says only adolescents suffer from growing pains?

SOS

Feminists and maybe some of my single friends will balk at me for saying this, but I'm really sick of singlehood.

I'm sick of turning up at parties and gatherings alone. I'm sick of being surrounded by couples. I'm sick of having to deal with things by myself. I'm sick of going on holidays alone. 'Cos you see, after awhile a nice place just becomes another nice place with no apparent significance when you have no one to share the moment with. I'm sick of being on my own.

Why is that it seems so easy for others to find that special someone yet for me, climbing Mt Everest seems to be an easier task – at least I know it's something I can train for and I can control.

Perhaps I'm really just unattractive to the opposite sex. Not pretty enough. Not thin enough. Not gentle enough. Or maybe I'm just too fussy. But you see, although I want to settle down, I don't want to settle. The former's about making a commitment whilst the latter a compromise.

I haven't been on a date in a million light years. I miss the whole process of preparing for a date – the fussing over what clothes, shoes and earrings to wear, the few butterflies in the stomach, and the anticipation of an evening ahead with a, hopefully interesting, man. I miss being treated like a woman. I miss being a woman.

Sick Of Singlehood – yes, that's me.

Freelancing

I don't know what is it about freelancing that gives people the impression that you're not working. I've been freelancing as an editor ever since returning from Dubai, but some of my friends seem to think I'm not working just because I'm at home while they're in the office.

This afternoon, a friend of mine sent me a message over msn. She asked how I could stand staying at home and not get bored when she was already bored to tears after just an afternoon at home, having taken the day off (she probably needed to clear leave).

'I AM working', I wrote back. And I have loads to do other than work. I have to reorganise my room. Last week, I went to IKEA and bought $158 worth of storage boxes. I'm throwing out old stuff and repacking things to make my room neater. It's all part of the Reorganisation-of-my-life project! I also take time out to exercise. Most of the time it's just a jog to MacRitchie and back. I did a slow 5km jog there yesterday and am aiming to increase that distance gradually. I catch up with friends, I read, I write, and I'm still looking for a full-time job. So really, I don't have time to feel bored.

Anyway, what is it about people who seem to need constant entertainment? I mean, isn't it enough to just pick up a book and read? Or just going for a jog or a slow walk around the neighbourhood? Or sitting by the pool and lazing the day away since it's a day off? Or cooking up a storm in the kitchen just for the fun of creating something? I just don't get how people can feel bored when there are loads of things to do. It's just a matter of going out there to look for it.

And please, freelancers ARE working too.

The Lone Traveller

I've come to realise that I can't travel do the lone travelling thing for more than two weeks. After two weeks, I really start to feel the loneliness and seeing new places just doesn't seem that fun anymore. Moreover, me being the foodie, I like having people to enjoy food with - if you're travelling with someone, you'll get to try more food.

There are good and bad things about travelling alone and in a group. When alone, you do as you please and don't have to care about what other people feel like doing. More often than not, you learn to really toughen up as a person as you have to deal with all sorts of situations on your own. You learn to be more resourceful and daring in asking for help, finding your way around etc. Like an animal who finds itself in strange territory, your senses are heightened and you have to be more alert in your surroundings. It's good training in survival skills and independence. I also often found myself more willing to talk to strangers or fellow lone travellers just 'cos I needed some human contact. It's probably the same for other lone travellers, too, as they are usually friendly and willing to chat as well. Because of this, I've had interesting conversations with people from other countries and whose lives are very different from mine.

Overall though, I'd say I prefer having a travel companion. I don't like travelling in a big group. The maximum group size for me would be four people. Any more than that and it just becomes difficult dealing with different preferences and personalities. Friendships may even be broken! Seven years ago I backpacked on my own in Europe and told myself that I'd never do it again because of loneliness. But I got myself into the same situation again! Sometimes it's not by choice...it's just the fact that it's difficult finding someone who can travel at the same time and who wants to do the same thing.

There's something romantic about travelling by train through Europe. I love doing it as there's some amazing scenery to be seen. The journeys may be long, but I feel like I'm watching a long and beautiful film when I'm travelling by train through Europe. I just love looking out of the window and just reflecting about life as I watch the scenes unfold in front of me. While travelling from Italy to Germany, I saw the vineyards, the open green fields, snow-capped mountains, the castles sitting atop a hill with the little villages below etc...absolutely gorgeous.

There also seems to be an unspoken comradeship among fellow train companions. It's like you become friends for that short journey and you start chatting. During my journey from Bologna to Nurnberg, there was a German guy, an Austrian, a mainland Chinese woman who has been living in Italy for 15 years, an Italian lady and myself in the same cabin. It was so international and there was Italian, Chinese, English, and German spoken during those hours we were in the train. It was an interesting cultural exchange. You'll never exchange contact details, but for those few hours you're friends. At the end of the journey, you say goodbye and wish each other a good journey. Other times, people say 'ciao' and with the nod of their head, acknowledge and thank you for your company and presence.

I guess it's times like that when I feel that travelling alone isn't that bad after all.

Tribute to London

It seems like it was only yesterday that I arrived in London with no job and no idea of what I would be doing in London to support myself. I was even prepared to work as a waitress. But thankfully I got a job as a development editor – doing what I was familiar with – and managed to keep myself above (just about) the poverty line in London.

However, I’ve now decided to leave London and I’m going to head home due to several reasons.

1. London is too expensive for me. I’m sick of living like a student, i.e. having no money to spend. When I have to think twice about buying a slice of cake just to treat myself, there really is something wrong. Things are so expensive it’s not funny. Tax is high and so much of my meagre salary goes to the UK government. I mean, it’d be OK if I even benefited from some of the tax money. But no, my money goes to supporting people on the dole.

2. It’s too difficult to relocate to a place all by myself. If I had a boyfriend or husband, it’d be so much easier. The loneliness is awful and I just don’t feel like dealing with it anymore. If I were still 20 years old and still in university with a bunch of uni friends, it’d have been different. But at this age, breaking into and forming new social circles is just so difficult.

3. I miss outrigger canoeing. I don’t miss dragonboating as much as I’ve been able to do it now and then while I’ve been here. But I definitely miss OC and I miss getting my regular and frequent dose of paddling, be it OC or DB. I’m so fat now because I haven’t been exercising as much!

4. I feel overwhelmed by this large city.

5. I’ve had it with UK property agents. They are real bullies and they are just out to take your money. I don’t want to go into further detail here, but my ex-flatmates and I have had a bad experience and we’re being ripped off. The worst thing is that we can’t do anything about it because they have our deposits and basically tenants in the UK have no rights whatsoever. It’s a seller’s market here and tenants are at the mercy of unscrupulous property agents and homeowners.

I leave the UK for good on Nov 12 for Italy. I guess you could say that I haven’t given the city enough time to grow on me, but sometimes you get a feeling about something and you just know what’s right for you.

For me, London’s a great city to visit but not to live. But there are things I really like about London and the UK in general.

1. I love the English countryside. The rolling green fields are so nice and peaceful. My regret this time is that I didn’t get to go to Scotland, Lake District and Peak District.

2. The little lanes and alleys that snake around old buildings are filled with boutique shops and cute little cafes.

3. Second-hand bookshops and the second-hand books in charity shops like Oxfam, British Heart Foundation, Save the Children shops for great for cheap book bargains. The literary worm in me can’t help but pop into one of these shops every time I walk past one.

4. I’m not a big drinker, but I love the old pubs with lots of character. There’s just a certain charm about drinking in an old pub in good old England.

5. I love pub-grub. Pub food is so down-to-earth and hearty – exactly the way I like my food. It’s English comfort food. My favourites are pies with mashed peas and gravy, fish and chips (but I usually give the chips away), and bangers & mash.

6. I love the easy access to the rest of Europe.

7. Earning in pounds and spending it overseas is great!

8. London's a fantastic city for art and cultural buffs. I love the free museums and the vibrant theatre and music scene here.

I leave the UK with many good memories of the friends I've made, the things I've seen and the places I've been to. I must extend my heartfelt thanks to dear friends, Joe and Keith, who have helped me so much in the time I've been in London. Thanks guys!!!

Anyway, the dimsumdolly won't be heading back to home shores just yet. Stay tuned for further updates!

Mr Big

A dinner conversation with some girlfriends the other day somehow spiralled into a sharing session of tragic personal love stories and led to the conclusion that every woman (OK, almost every woman) has a Mr Big in her life. For those who don't know, I'm referring to Carrie Bradshaw's Mr Big in Sex and the City.

So the Mr Big in a woman's life is the guy who has this mysterious hold on you. He hurts you time and time again; you hate him yet love him at the same time. He leaves you and you go on with your own life. Yet if he ever said he wanted to be with you or asked you to go back to him, you'd drop everything and be by his side in a split second. Your mind and heart know no logic when it comes to any matters that pertain to him – no matter what happens, there's always a corner in your heart that loves him even though he's the person who has made you shed the most tears and inflicted the most pain and heartache. You try to forget, but thoughts of him still haunt you like a ghost from the past. You know you shouldn't love, but you still do anyway.

Can you ever forget the past? And if you could, would you want to? Would you want to have the situation like what was depicted in The Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind? That is, have your memories completely erased? It would probably be less painful but would that make you a blander person? Or a less matured person?

Sara Bareilles' Gravity best epitomises the Mr Big situation.

Gravity

Something always brings me back to you.
It never takes too long.
No matter what I say or do
I’ll still feel you here ’til the moment I’m gone.

You hold me without touch.
You keep me without chains.
I never wanted anything so much
than to drown in your love and not feel your rain.

Set me free, leave me be.
I don’t want to fall another moment into your gravity.
Here I am and I stand so tall, just the way I’m supposed to be.
But you’re on to me and all over me.

You loved me ’cause I’m fragile.
When I thought that I was strong.
But you touch me for a little while
and all my fragile strength is gone.

Set me free, leave me be.
I don’t want to fall another moment into your gravity.
Here I am and I stand so tall,
just the way I’m supposed to be.
But you’re on to me and all over me.

I live here on my knees as I try to make you see that you’re
everything I think I need here on the ground.
But you’re neither friend nor foe though I can’t seem to let you go.
The one thing that I still know is that you’re keeping me down.

You’re on to me, you’re on to me and all over…

Something always brings me back to you….
It never takes too long.

Supposedly Me

You Have a Choleric Temperament

You are a person of great enthusiasm - easily excited by many things. Unsatisfied by the ordinary, you are reaching for an epic, extraordinary life. You want the best. The best life. The best love. The best reputation. You posses a sharp and keen intellect. Your mind is your primary weapon. Strong willed, nothing can keep you down. Your energy can break down any wall. You're an instantly passionate person - and this passion gives you an intoxicating power over others. At your worst, you are a narcissist. Full of yourself and even proud of your faults. Stubborn and opinionated, you know what you think is right. End of discussion. A bit of a misanthrope, you often see others as weak, ignorant, and inferior.

Giving Thanks

This morning an email sent by the MD stunned everyone - a colleague had died in a cycling accident either over the weekend or just this very morning. I had even spoken to this lady before. It's so sad that it's a life cut short.

Then later in the day, a friend tells me her father has cancer.

Such sobering thoughts that remind me to give thanks that I'm alive and well.

Time Poverty Is In Vogue!

I'm currently reading some chick lit. It's a book called Sushi for Beginners by the author Marian Keyes. It accompanies me on my train journeys to and from work, when my mind can't handle anything serious. And I paid £2 for it - it came free with a magazine, and the only reason I bought the brainless women's magazine was because I thought it was a good deal to get a magazine and a book for £2. That's me - Miss Bargain Hunter.

Anyways, one of the protagonists is this high-flying career woman and there was this paragraph in the book which said that Time Poverty, like the next Prada or Louis Vuitton bag, seems to be the in thing to have these days. It's directly proportional to how popular and important you are. It's ironic considering the meaning of the word "poverty".

You know, like people have no time to meet up with their friends because they're (a) travelling for work (b) going for some party (3) going for some pilates or yoga class (4) having some business appointment etcetc. So to meet up with them, you'll have to look at at least five different dates to fix an appointment. And even when an appointment is fixed, it's acceptable to cancel at the last minute, giving the reason that work or something life-threatening - like an appointment with one's hairdresser who's about to go on leave for 3 weeks - has taken you away from the appointment.

I mean, it's so true, isn't it? So many people these days are like that. There is no longer the spontaniety of just calling up a friend and say, "hey, do you want to meet for acuppa/dinner/movie later?" These days, you have to "book" people weeks or months in advance. Their appointment books are always full and their schedules are fixed months in advance.

So the equation of the day is: Time Poverty = kPopularity and/or Importance (where k is a variable constant)

Weather Blues

Now I can finally understand why the English like talking about the weather. OK, it’s a gross generalisation, but it’s true that the topic of weather comes up quite often in conversation, I think just ‘cos people are hoping desperately for some good weather! Days in London are SO dreary. It’s been just grey skies and rainy and just downright depressing. Can’t even go to the parks and sit around or go for walk or hikes. I don’t know how people live here!!!

I don’t know what I’m going to do over the weekend. Probably check out some free stuff going on or something.

Update

So after having fun in Spain, I’m back to the daily grind of work. At first I wasn’t looking forward to it, but now that I’ve started, I’m actually enjoying it. I guess I’m enjoying it mainly because it gives me something to do, and it gives me a taste of working life in London. Also, I get to meet new people and, more importantly, be around people.

I’ve come to realise that although I’m not the kind of person who’s the life of the party, I enjoy being around people for the most part. Although of course, me-time is also important. However, I’ve been getting too much me-time since coming to London and it’s starting to get depressing. In Singapore I had a good social life, but now I have zero. Close to zero anyway. Except for occasional meet-ups with Joe and Keith who very kindly include me in activities when they can, I’m alone pretty much the rest of the time. I guess it doesn’t help that I’m not the most outgoing person in the world!

So I’m glad that the job is letting me be around people at least on weekdays. And my colleagues are really nice. Now I don’t even look forward to weekends ‘cos that would mean being all alone. Oh, the trials and tribulations of moving to a whole new place all by oneself!

Anyhow, it’s particularly difficult to have a social life when you don’t have much money. That’s the reality of it! Also, it takes time to get to know people. Anyway, I guess I’m not really here to live long-term nor to sink roots. My main aim is to travel and see new things and often you just have to do it on your own. I’m getting used to being alone pretty much all the time. Yes, it does get very lonely, but I don’t think I have much of a choice!

I guess one could go to bars and pubs with friends to hang out and meet other people, but I’m hopeless in such settings. I’m really like a fish out of water in these watering holes. I still feel awkward in those situations where people just stand around and drink. The only kind of “water” thing I’m totally at home with is anything that involves paddling. And I’m quite hopeless when it comes to making new friends. It takes me awhile to warm up to people and I’m pretty quiet for the most part. People probably think I’m a super boring and super dull person.

The job itself is nothing very new to me. I’m doing pretty much what I was doing back in Singapore, just a more specialised area of being a production editor. Previously I was involved in both development and production editing. I’ve dived into the thick of things and I have enough work to keep me going. Even though the work is not totally new, I’m still learning new things about how things are done in the UK, the company protocol is different, the markets are different etc.

I’ve noticed that people in London often pack or make their own lunch because it’s cheaper to do so. Otherwise, the most common thing that people buy for lunch is a sandwich. Or perhaps a salad. Sandwiches are by far the most popular. I’ve eaten countless sandwiches since I got here – the number of sandwiches I’ve eaten so far has very much exceeded the number I eat in Singapore in a year! It gets really boring after awhile…nothing like the variety of food available in Singapore. You wonder why these people have no desire to get away from the traditional sandwich, salad and baguette. Really miss the hawker fare back home.

Londoners are also always in a rush. Although statistics seem to point otherwise, I feel that London is more stifling and crowded than Singapore. Maybe this is because the streets in London are narrower. The underground subway system, fondly referred to as the “Tube” by Londoners, is awful. It’s stuffy and dirty and you’re packed like sardines in rush hour. The buses are a lot better, but just that it’s slow due to the heavy traffic. It’s no help that the roads in London are very narrow, allowing for two lanes max. Wherever possible, I’ll walk as it’s probably faster. Walking is the best way to see London I think. You can discover alleys and streets full of character that way.

Even though London is a very exciting, culturally and historically rich city where there’s always something to do, I don’t think it’ll ever capture me like Sydney does. I really miss the sea and there just seems to be fewer outdoor activities available in London. And the weather’s just so crappy that all you want to do is hole up at home or maybe hang out in the museum. You see, while I do like arts and culture, there’s only so much time I can stand being in museums. I’d much rather be outdoors doing some sport where I can be in the sunshine and in touch with nature.

But one thing I really love about London is its literary scene and the availability of cheap books. I LOVE the second-hand book shops here. You can get books in very decent condition from £1! Just the other day, I bought a brand-new hardback book from a bookshop along Charing Cross Road for £2.50!

I’ve also shifted out of my friends’ flat and now I’m staying in Queen’s Park, an area in the west of London. It sounds posh, but it’s not. Like setting up home, I had to buy bedsheets, towels, etc. Had to pay £100 to the previous occupant of my room for the bed, wardrobe, drawers etc. The room’s tiny and it faces a main road, so it’s really noisy. I’d have to be really tired to be able to block all the traffic noise out of my head and fall asleep!

Anyway, last Saturday morning I went outrigger canoeing. The club that I contacted is probably the only club in UK which does OC. They have two OC6s, some OC2s and some OC1s. I went in the OC6, sitting at seat 5 just in front of the coach. Their canoes are stored at the University of London Boathouse at Chiswick and they paddle along the Thames River.

It was nice to be paddling again but it’s not really much fun OC-ing on flat water. I’d rather be dragonboating then…at least it’s a sport that’s meant for flatwater. OC-ing along the Thames River is super dull. But OK, at least it was a good break from the crowds of Central London. It’s already getting to me and driving me insane. As we paddled, I saw many ducks, swans and other birds. My favourite sighting was a mother duck swimming across the river with her brood of four ducklings following behind. They were such a cute sight!

I’ll check out a dragonboat club first and then decide which one I want to join. I’d like to join one of the clubs ‘cos at least it’s something for me to do. Plus it’s something I enjoy.

Anyway, it's 6.30pm now and I should get out of the office. I'm the only one left! The weird thing is that this 35-hour work week concept is so foreign to me. Like it seems un-godly to leave at 4.30pm and this is really like normal working hours for me back in Singapore! Anyway, I usually stay back to catch up on emails and blog.

Have a good weekend everyone.

Slow Spain

And oh, everything is in slow motion here. Spanish time is so relaxed it´s unbelievable. It´s like people here have it so easy with the siestas, and the late nights. I see kids running around late at night when I already feel like going to bed. The people here are also very friendly and so relaxed. No one´s in a rush at all. And the local women and men are so gorgeous. These people really have good genes. And oh, I love the

Anyway, more on Spain when I get back.

Ugly Betty

Many of my girlfriends and I are fans of the popular American sitcom Ugly Betty and I think the reason we enjoy it is because we all see something of ourselves in her.

Thankfully none of us share the same fashion sense as Betty (played by the very endearing America Ferrera), but we can certainly identify with all her insecurities – finding her place in this big and scary world, getting started on her career, dealing with the struggles of life, dating woes and figuring who her true love really is etc.

The characters in the show are also interesting, each nicely fleshed out by a great cast. I love Betty's gay nephew Justin (Mark Indelicato) best. This young actor is so fantastic with all his rather effeminate mannerisms and portrayal of the way he idolizes Martha Stewart is hilarious. Betty's boss, Daniel Meade is played by Eric Mabius who is good-looking in a very believable, everyday way. I mean, he's not drop-dead gorgeous like the Adonis-like hunks you typically see on the big screen, but he's still someone whom women would consider "cute" if he walked past us on the street or saw him at a bar. So it's that kind of cute where women find accessible, so to speak. Vanessa L. Williams also plays the rather evil-looking creative director, Wilhelmina Slater, to a hilt.

The show has a great mix of elements - humour, romance, and mystery. It also has a good dose of family values, friendship and also enough cattiness to keep audience interest up. I also love to look at all the couture that's paraded in the show, what with most of the action centred in Mode magazine's office.

Ferrera manages to play Betty with such earnestness and at the end of the day, we are all rooting for her, the underdog, to triumph against all the odds against her.

At this point, I'll segue into a conversation I had with a good friend couple of days ago. We were musing about how struggles are a part of life and he said that he actually enjoys swimming against the tide and dealing with those struggles as he finds it challenging. And that, he believes, is what life is about.

Hmm...I don't know about that. I guess the only reason why he can say something like that now is because he's never encountered any major obstacles in his life. So far, everything has gone smoothly for him. He's gone to all the top schools, managed to find a job he enjoys, knows where he wants to go in his career, has recently purchased a studio apartment and is already planning other investments in preparation for retirement in years to come.

As for me, I don't enjoy swimming against the tide - put it down to laziness or whatever, but I'd rather have it easy than hard. But I guess it's true, too, that you can't appreciate the good times if you don't know the hard.

Anyway, we agreed that probably the only way out of this struggle is to opt for a spiritual or religious life, which would mean renouncing the secular world. But we both agreed that it's not a path we would choose for ourselves (at least at this point in time) because we can't give up all the yummy food in the world, men (for me) and women (for him). Haha.

So there you go. My Sunday musings.

One of the Boys

You know you have become one of the boys when a group of heterosexual males have no qualms talking blatantly about sex, their sex lives, the size of their manhood and women around you. I must concede that it was, erm, very interesting and it gave me more insight into the male psyche...

Mapping a Person

I came across a personal blog the other day and was very intrigued by it because of its owner's heartfelt words which then made me delve deeper into her blog. As I went through the entries, I pieced together an image of her in my mind. It felt voyeuristic reading the private thoughts and feelings of a stranger. But I guess if you're prepared to have a blog, you must be prepared to have total strangers lurking about.

Like a puzzle, I found myself trying to piece together the different facets of this girl's life - her job, personality, interests etc. She seemed like a troubled soul and her personal relationships with men suffered because of it. It wasn't the most happy of blogs, but what I liked about it was that her words came from her heart and there were no pretensions.

Sometimes I wonder what total strangers make of me when they read my blog. I know there are some readers out there whom I've never met. I'm curious as to what makes them continue to read about a stranger's life. If they ever met me, I wonder if I'll match the image they have of me. Interesting thought.

Collecting Experiences

I was chatting to a friend over msn today and he told me that he had just turned 28 over the weekend and had spent some time rethinking his life. He said he now finds that he is less keen on "collecting" experiences. Our conversation was fleeting as we were both busy, so I didn't get to ask him why. However I told him that it's interesting, 'cos for me, it's the collecting of experiences that's keeping me going in life.

In all honesty, I'm hardly the ambitious sort of person. Though I do envy the wads of cash that spill from the wallets of the bankers, lawyers, businessmen (you get the drift) out there, I can't picture myself climbing the corporate ladder. Maybe I'm just not cut out for it. Some people strive in corporate environments. While I don't wither and wilt away in such environments, I don't particularly enjoy the environment either.

What then do I want, you ask me. I've been asking myself that question all these years but I've yet to come up with an answer. I know what I WOULD like to be, but getting there seems so impossible. I envy people who seem to know what they want right from the very start. Why can't I be one of those people and why can't the job I want to do bring in the sort of money such that I don't have to worry so much about not having enough of it?

So I haven't found a vocation that motivates me enough. But I do love life and I want to experience and try new things all the time. Most of which involve travelling. So in order to do that, I have to work and earn money. Therein lies my motivation. Thus, unlike my friend, I live to collect experiences.

A columnist in today's issue of Life! wrote about how she is suffering from a quarter-life crisis upon turning 26. She was a little miffed that she wasn't allowed (by her older friends) to complain and whine about her age and the worries about a 26-year-old journalist who earns pittance compared to her high-flying executive friends. I can identify with her - I used to and still do feel this way.

I've been feeling very stagnant for awhile hence I've taken some steps to make some changes in my life. As to what these changes are, my family and close friends already know, and it'll unfold on this blog in the not too distant future. Whether it's for the better or worse, I have NO idea at this point. All I know is that while life won't be perfect, it will be different. At least for awhile.

A Reason to Write

Ooh, olduvai has tagged me...this gives me a reason to write...I've been very uninspired of late as you can see from my lack of updates. So here it goes!

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3 things that scare me:
Being blind
Having no money
Reptiles

3 people who make me laugh:
My dog (ok fine, he's not a person per se)
Simon Cowell (I love his acerbic and caustic comments)
Any self-deluded person on reality talent shows

3 things I love:
The sea
Food
A good book

3 things I hate:
Rainy days (that means I can't canoe or do any outdoor sports!)
Working with the mainland Chinese (it's like paying penance)
People who peck at their food

3 things I don’t understand:
Men
Politicians
Life

3 things on my desk:
Bills (bleah)
My IXUS 850
A potted plant in a bright, red cheery pot

3 things I’m doing right now:
Going through my blog feeds
Eating breakfast
Listening to some jazz music

3 things I want to do before I die:
Live and work in another country
Travel the world
Take part in an outrigger canoe race in Hawaii

3 things I can do:
Steer an outrigger canoe and dragon boat
Eat a lot
Make Cantonese soup

3 things you should listen to:
Your gut feeling
Your gut (eat whatever and whenever it tells you to)
WOXY

3 things you should never listen to:
Singapore radio
Devil's advocate
Politicians

3 things I’d like to learn:
Make my money grow
Ski
Cook well

3 favorite foods:
Well-made sweet and sour pork
A mean chocolate lava cake
My mum's soups

3 beverages I drink regularly:
Distilled water
Tap water
Chinese tea

3 TV shows/Books I watched/read as a kid:
Smurfs
Mr Men and Little Miss Series
Care Bears

3 people I have to tag:
overacuppa, monoceros, chungking express

Ambergris

Yes, you're probably thinking 'Huh? What the hell's ambergris???'

Well, suffice to say that after reading this article, I wished all the puking drunks outside the pubs and discos could somehow metamorphose into sperm whales.

Mee Pok Man

This has nothing to do with Eric Khoo's film Mee Pok Man, but the Mee Pok Man referred to in this post is no less famous. I don't think any SCGS girl, past or present, knew his name. He was simply known as the "Mee Pok Man" in school. I was in Beijing on Saturday night when an ex-colleague who also used to be an SCGS girl sms-ed to tell me that he had died.

I felt a little sad that an icon of SCGS has passed on. He's practically an institution. Numerous batches of SCGS girls (even my mum ate his noodles when she was a student there!) have eaten his noodles. Hell, it was our staple diet. I grew up on it for 10 years, being there from Primary 1 to Secondary 4. The stall used to be run by him, his wife and his elderly mother. The latter scared the hell out of every girl 'cos she was very fierce. I always preferred buying from "Uncle" because he was nicer and his noodles tasted better. But if time doesn't permit and one didn't run out of class to the canteen fast enough, settling for the shorter queue at his mum's side of the stall was the next best thing.

My favourite was always "Mee Pok Tah" (dried mee pok) and I would always ask for only a little of chilli, and maybe sometimes just a little more vinegar.

His noodle stall was definitely the most famous one amongst SCGS girls and I'm sure his memory will live on in many of us.

Nice Stranger

I was walking towards International Plaza to get some breakfast when I heard an "Excuse me."

I turned around to find myself facing a woman in her 20s. At first I thought she wanted to ask me for directions. So imagine my surprise when she said, "Oh, I just wanted to say that I really like how your shoes match your earrings so well!"

So sweet of her! I thanked her for her lovely compliment and also noticed that she was wearing a lovely necklace, and complimented her on it as well. She chirpily replied that her grandmother had made it for her. Cool, yah! Then we bade each other goodbye with a "Have a fantastic day!"

I think this has really made my day! I should learn from that stranger - a compliment or two can really make a difference to someone's day!

Stagnated

So this is probably the longest stretch of time I’ve left my blog without a proper entry. A brief “Uninspired” sent some messages from concerned friends my way. Thanks, guys. It’s really nice and comforting to know I have friends who care. Appreciate it.

Well, I’ve just been uninspired to write. I haven’t been checking out new eating places. I haven’t gone on any dates. I haven’t done anything new. In short, my life seems stagnated. Hence the lack of inspiration.

A friend sms-ed me last night and said she wanted to cancel out on a blind date that’s to take place on Friday. Nerves must have struck her and she said maybe she should “act blur” and hope the guy will forget about it. My reply: “Don’t be stupid! Just go ok! Give yourself a chance. If you REALLY don’t want, I’ll go on that date since I’m so freakg bored & hv no plans yet 4 fri!Wld u prefer tt???”

I think that reply did it – she is, hopefully, going on that date. Haha. But what I wrote is true, right? At least she can get a free meal, ok! In my opinion, that’s good enough a reason to go. ;)

Uninspired

Over-protective Parents

Some parents in Singapore are just way too protective over their children. I was in a toilet in Raffles City on Saturday night (was attending yet another boring Chinese wedding dinner - *yawn*) and there was this girl of about 3 or 4 years old, crying away near the area where the sinks were.

She was wailing away and kept telling her mum that she wanted to go to the toilet on her own. If my child wanted to exert her independence at such a young age, I'd be more than happy to let her go on her own. 'Cos I believe teaching a child to be independent is one of the best things you can do for your child and it has to start with little things like that.

Of course, opinions always differ. This particular mother obviously thought different from me because she was scolding her daughter for wanting to go on her own and insisting that she was too young to do so and that she would be in danger of locking herself in the toilet.

And I'm thinking, c'mon, it's not like the door is sssooooo difficult to unlock. It's just a matter of sliding the ledge in and out. And even if she did lock (I would definitely give the little girl more credit) herself in, tiny her could have easily crawled out through the space under the door.

I don't know how this little dispute resolved itself in the end 'cos by the time I left the toilet, the girl was still crying and insisting on going on her own and saying that she wouldn't end up locking herself in.

I guess her mother was also afraid of her dirtying herself. But hey, that's how kids learn. Parents here should just learn to let go a little!

Goodbye & Good Luck!

Olduvai left for the US early this morning where she'll stay for two months, after which she'll be heading for the UK for further studies. I'm going to miss this good friend of mine. No more eating kaki and no more conversations about life, food, books, movies etc over a good meal.

But I am extremely happy for her. And excited for her too! This is going to be such an exciting time for her! I will live her adventures vicariously through her blog.

It's nice to see that people are moving on in their lives, living new experiences and adventures. Of course, I hope that I'm doing so myself. I think I'm not doing too badly. I guess, or at least I hope so!

Goodbye and Good Luck gal!

Checking Email

On checking my work email this morning, I saw that I had three emails sent by two colleagues over the weekend. One on Saturday and two on Sunday.

The one sent on Saturday was from a colleague who's travelling on business at the moment, so I can understand why he's sending work emails over the weekend. I realise that when travelling on business, the concept of a break over the weekend doesn't quite exist 'cos you're cut off from your routine and weekday nights and weekends are probably the only times you can clear and answer emails.

But the two emails sent on Sunday by a Chinese colleague of mine is just insane. She sent it in the late morning, and I'm thinking "Woman, go get a life!!!"

I don't know what she is doing checking work email over the weekend. She's such a workoholic that I think the concept of work-life balance does not actually exist in her realm.

Personally, I don't check work email over the weekend unless absolutely necessary. That would mean that I would be informed at a certain part of the work week that I will be expecting over the weekend. It's just that I feel it's important AND healthy to give myself a break from work over the weekend. So that means no checking of work email or doing any work. I feel that I return to work as a more efficient worker if I've had a proper break. But this doesn't mean that I have never worked over the weekend. I have done so on many occasions. However, I do it on a need-to basis. Thankfully that hasn't been too often.

But this Chinese colleague of mine is just over the top. Someone needs to tell her to slow down and just smell the roses.

Good Morning!

This morning, when i got on Bus Number 162 to come to work, the bus driver greeted me, and everyone that boarded the bus "Good morning". Tis a rare thing to happen in Singapore.

And that's why i really like this bus driver who greets all the passengers. It's the third time i'm taking his bus. 'Cos sometimes i might take other bus numbers as this is not the only bus that can take me to work.

But now i hope that i'll be able to catch his bus because it's nice to have a friendly bus driver who greets his passengers. It's just a nice way to start the day. So much more pleasant.

Why isn't it a common occurence for people in Singapore to say "good morning" to strangers? Once, when i went jogging in the morning at a park, i just smiled and said "good morning" to a woman walking in the opposite direction, and i think she thought i was mad 'cos she was shocked and a strange expression came onto her face when i said it.

And actually I can understand why bus drivers don't greet people. 'Cos when they do, Singaporeans are such idiots--they don't greet the person back! Instead they just have a shocked expression on their faces, as if thinking that the stranger who just greeted them "good morning" is mad!

Thankfully, i think Singaporeans are getting better. The other day, i observed that most of the people acknowledged the bus driver's greeting and greeted him back in return.

I think such little things make the world just that little bit nicer and more pleasant to live in, don't you? :)

Gag Order Lifted

So my blog has been resurrected, and many thanks to vantan who is the technical whiz. This blog wouldn't be here without her, 'cos really, I'm a technical idiot. Thanks to hundreds of thousands--I'm not kidding, I had about 190,000 trackback spams--the webhost suspended the account as the spams were overloading the webhost's CPU. That's what happened according to my understanding. Don't ask me to explain more 'cos I have no explanation to give.

Anyway, the days that I didn't get to write, I felt like I was given a gag order. And it felt horrible!

The weekend was great. I went wakeboarding at Punggol Marina on Friday morning with monoceros, her godsis and a friend of theirs. It was good fun. After that, I went to Sentosa to outrigger canoe. Along with five other teammates, we paddled from Tanjong Beach to Kusu Island and St John's Island. When we were out at sea, we were caught in the rain but thankfully it wasn't that heavy that we had to take shelter on the islands. We managed to paddle our way there and back (in the rain for most part) in 1hr 10min, thanks also to the tide being in our favour.

Saturday morning, as usual, was dragonboat time. A 5km jog along Marina Promenade preceeded dragonboat practice. It's actually a really nice jog with trees providing shade and the Singapore Harbour in view. Dragonboat practice was tough--everyone was spent after that.

Sunday I was having a sneezing fit for the entire day after bringing my collie to the vet. I have a sensitive nose and too much of his fur in close proximity evokes such a reaction. Not fun.

Monday. Yucks. The blues hit again. Crisis management took hold the first thing I came into the office. Not fun also.

Climate of Fear

It's no wonder people in China are afraid of making decisions and assuming responsibility for decisions if what I witnessed on Monday is the norm in China.

I was at the office of the co-publisher I work with. And the two editors I was going through the page proofs with suddenly requested that we take a photo together. They explained to me that they had to do so to prove to their boss that they are working with me. They even started taking pictures of the page proofs that were lying on the table. And there I was thinking how bizarre the whole situation is. There's absolutely no trust at all in one's employees.

Then I'm also told that books are picked at random to undergo a quality check. For every "mistake" they find, e.g. the line should be one point thinner in width, 0.5/1 demerit point is given. If the book hits a certain number of demerit points, the editor working on it will be fired.

I just think it's ridiculous to be fired over such little matters. There's absolutely no room for mistakes. It's like in China you're only marked for the bad things and never rewarded for the good. It's no wonder this climate of fear prevails where mistakes and failures are not tolerated. Such an Asian thing! So annoying!

Inviting Me???

I don't understand why people I wouldn't think of inviting to *my* wedding (if I were going to have one) would invite me to theirs. The only reason (being cynical me) I can think of is that they want to make up numbers. Got the email below on Monday.

=========================================

Hi Xxxx,

It�s been some time since we met. [er, yah! At least seven years! And this friend suddenly pops up] What better way to catch up than at a wedding dinner :) [eerrr, NO!!!!! Please, like you think you will even have the time to say hi, much less have a decent conversation during a dinner with 400 - 500 guests.]

X & I are getting married on XX Month 2006, Sunday @_______. We�ll love to have you (and your partner???) there �. please save the date! [Who's X? Like I'm supposed to know who she is when I haven't even spoken to you in seven years. I have no partner and no, I'm NOT saving the date.]

Formal invitation will follow.

XY
========================================

I mean seriously, I think it's meaningless to go when I'm not close to this person at all. And this is my rule of thumb as far as agreeing to attend weddings goes--I'll only go if I've spoken or communicated with the person in the past year. That means I'm close enough to the person to keep in touch. Otherwise, I consider it a waste of time and money.

Lessons from Mr. B

1) Do not be late the first time you're meeting someone. A good first impression it does not make I'm afraid.

2) Do not talk only about work--it bores the hell outta people.
- But then again, in Mr. B's case, I suppose he didn't have anything else to talk about.

3) Do ask your date questions about herself.
- It's rude to talk only about yourself and not ask questions in return. This is NOT an interview thank you very much. You're not the interviewee and your date isn't the interviewer.

4) Do not keep shifting your eyes and looking at other people going in and out of the restaurant all of the time, just because you want to look out for people you might know and so you can "network".

5) Do not be so desperate to network such that when you think a lady sitting outside to be your company doctor, you go outside to say "hi" only to discover you've made a mistake.

- I nearly wanted to laugh in his face when I heard it. But mainly I was disgusted at his pathetic attempts to network. He was telling me earlier how important it is to just say "hi" to people even if it's just an acquaintance. Pls, give me a break. I would only say hi to a family doctor I've been seeing since a kid and not a doctor at a clinic whom I see once in a blue moon.

6) Again, do not be so desperate to network with other people in the restaurant when you're on a date. Identifying correctly the senior banker at your bank who comes 15min later after the booboo with the "doctor" doesn't make the first botched attempt less pathetic. So he goes up to say "hi" to the senior banker. From my observation through the glass window, the man had no clue who Mr. B was. I bet Mr. B must have name-dropped some other senior banker's name and so the man was seemingly cordial to his networking attempts.

7) Develop some balls.
- Don't tell me you really don't like drinking and smoking, but you do it only to fraternise with the traders and brokers you have to work with. But really, your cigarette is in your hand most of the time. Please, at least be daring and man enough to say "No" and stop being such a phony.

8) If you don't already have a life outside of work, please get yourself one NOW.

The Old Cobbler

I don't know what I would do without those old uncles who make a living repairing the shoes along street corners. They are a dying breed who fixes shoes at such low prices. And most of the time, they're very skillful!

Just had a pair of heels fixed by an old uncle who sits along Robinson Road. And as I waited for my shoes to be fixed, I just thought of how sad it would be when I will no longer see these old cobblers with their little stools and all their gear crouched at little street corners.

It's Not a Love Bite!

Friends who have seen me recently have asked if the red mark on my neck is a love bite. While I'd like to say I been having some amorous liaison with some hot hunk, the truth of the matter is that it's caused by eczema! Been having eczema and heat rash often exacerbated when I perspire after my jogs.

So yes please, it ain't no love bite!

Pseudo Autistic

To borrow a term coined by my friend to describe people who are rather anti-social and tend to be rather quiet, I think the term "pseudo autistic" is one that suits me fine.

You see, I'm horrible when I find myself in a situation where I don't know many people. Like last night, when I went along with my friend to her friend's party. I just couldn't do the mingling thing and try to chat to people I didn't know. Seriously, I feel uncomfortable in such situations and then my pseudo autistic tendencies will surface. But well, at least on my part there's self-awareness of these tendencies so maybe I'm on the lower end of the pseudo autistic scale.

I'm fine with one-on-one or small group interaction though. Maybe it's because I just don't find that so intimidating. I'm quite shy by nature. Was a shy child, am a shy adult. I take time to warm up to people and often I need people to draw me out.

So if you ever see me at a party and I come across at being aloof, I'm really not. It's really shyness more than anything else!

Fireworks

I have been very fortunate to catch the fireworks display twice during the Chinese New Year period because of some celebrations at Boat Quay.

I happened to catch it again tonight from the comfort of my room and it was so beautiful to see the colours adorning the night sky even though those coloured streaks and shapes are so transient.

Did you know that there are now fireworks that burst into the shape of a heart? There's even a double heart one where two hearts are linked together! There's also one which bursts into a red star within a white round circle.

Watching fireworks light up the sky is one of those things which can never fail to put a smile on my face and a laugh in my heart.

Friday musings

Got notification of my salary review two days ago. At this rate of increase, I think I�d only reach the $5k mark at retirement age. And even then, retirement is being pushed further and further back these days. Quite a depressing thought. And by the time I reach the $10k mark, I�d be six feet underground and that�s probably only because people are burning paper money for me.

�

I was talking with a financial advisor about two months ago. He calculated that if I wanted to have a monthly income of $3k after I retire at 65, I�d have to accumulate about $2.46million in savings by retirement. I nearly choked on my food and fell off my chair when I heard it. But it�s totally plausible when taking into account inflation. How to make so much money? Can somebody tell me? Beg, steal or borrow?

�

A friend I had dinner with last night told me of how her two female colleagues in their early 20s asked her if her boyfriend was rich or not. She was appalled (naturally) as what kind of question is that??? When she told them that no, her boyfriend isn�t rich and that he�s still in uni, they went �Then how do you survive??? Don�t you like rich men???�

I don�t understand the mentality of these women. Do they mean to say that they expect their boyfriend to pay for everything? And that they cannot survive on their own without a rich man for a boyfriend?

�

In yesterday�s issue of URBAN, two women who are self-confessed shopholics were featured. One of them is in her early 50s and spends all of her $1500 income on shopping. Her philosophy is that one should live in the moment and there�s no need to bother about saving. She leaves her husband to bring in the money for the rest of the family. The other woman, a young lady of 25, spends a big portion of her salary on shopping. She shops almost every day as she works in Wisma Atria. In order to have more money to shop, she eats at McDonald�s every day (yucks!!!) and pays for her meals there using her EZ-link card �cos she says her mum tops up the card for her all the time. I'm surprised she isn't at all embarrassed about admitting this 'cos I certainly would be!

...

I have to work on Saturday and next Saturday as well. The whole day. Sacred Saturdays are burnt. Boohoohoo.

...

I�m thinking those two women seriously need some help in curbing their shopping addiction!!!

...

To those two spineless colleagues of my friend's, I say "C�mon, get a bit of backbone already!"

...

I bought a $2 TOTO ticket for this week's $10million draw. I went for Quickpick. I bought only one ticket 'cos I figured if you're meant to win you're meant to win. It's the first TOTO ticket I've ever bought. I might just have beginner's luck and then I might not have to worry too much about retirement. Draw's tonight!

...

I'm not being paid enough to have my Saturdays burnt without complaint.

Radio Gag

To celebrate radio's 70th anniversary in Singapore, there's this 70-hour radio gag going on right now with several DJs from the local radio stations. I think about seven DJs are taking on this challenge where they can't speak for 70 hours all for the cause of charity. If they succeed in doing so, the particular charity that their radio station is supporting will get $70,000.

I'm thinking it must be really difficult for people who make their living from talking to shut up for 70 hours. I mean, it's difficult for any person! Even for myself, evidently not the most talkative and sociable person in the world, I find it difficult to not talk at all for one day. But I think for the DJs it's not that bad as they are allowed to communicate with others through writing (e.g. SMS or just writing on a piece of paper), just not talking.

It's intrinsically human to want to communicate and socialise. Humans are, after all, social creatures. Even if one wanted to live like a hermit, it's quite difficult to do so in modern society.

A friend once told me that she had gone for a nine-day meditation retreat. During the retreat, all the participants weren't allowed to talk to one another at all. Most of the time, they were alone--spending time reflecting and getting to know their own self. She said she found it hard not talking and communicating with others in the first three days but after that, she actually found it very refreshing and that it was a good time for her to get to know herself.

I don't know if that kind of retreat is for me. I suppose it would be a good challenge but it's not something I want to take on just yet. I don't think I could survive the first day!

Trivia

Some little trivia about myself which I wrote down for a meme...

1. Diamonds or pearls?
Both--i'm greedy.

2. What was the last film you saw at the cinema?
Jarhead

3. What is your favorite TV show?
None at the moment. Hardly watch TV.

4. What did you have for breakfast?
A big cup of freshly squeezed fruit juice made by my mummy.

5. What is your middle name?
NA

6. What is your favorite food?
Cantonese food.

7. What foods do you dislike?
Anything that has too much milk and cream in it.

8. Your favorite Potato chip?
None. Don't like potato and all its spin-offs/derivatives in
general.

9. What is your favorite CD at the moment?
None.

10. Favorite drink?
Water. The best thirst quencher.

11. If you could go anywhere in the world on vacation, where
would it be?
Europe

12. Favorite brand of clothing?
No particular brand. Just as long as it's comfortable and the
cutting suits me, I like! I like shopping at Far East Plaza...it's
like some belated teenage craze.

13. Where would you retire?
Sydney.

14. Favorite time of day?
Any time when i'm not in the office. So that probably means
evenings and nights.

15. What laundry detergent do you use?
Dynamo

16. Coke or Pepsi?
None. Don't drink both.

17. Are you a morning person or night owl?
Morning person.

18. What size shoe do you wear?
7

19. Do you have pets?
Yes. One collie and one poodle.

20. Favorite Candy Bar?
Don't eat sweets.

21. Favorite season?
Summer. Love it when's the sun's hot and one can hit the
beach!

22. Piercings:
Left ear, right ear.

23. Eye color:
Dark brown.

24. Ever been to Africa?
No

25. Favorite day of the week?
Saturday. Then i get to go to the beach.

26. Favorite flower?
Sunflower-- 'cos how can one possibly not smile when you
see one?

27. Favorite ice cream?
Rich, dark chocolate ice cream

28. Disney or Warner Brothers?
Disney

29. Favorite fast food restaurant?
None. Hate fast-food. Avoid them like the plague.

30. What color is your bedroom carpet?
No carpet. Closest thing to a carpet are both of my dogs
who seem to love lying around in my room.

31. Which store would you choose to Max out your Credit Card?
Cold Storage supermarket. A gal needs her siupply of food. I
would choose NTUC Fairprice for its cheaper prices, but alas
NTUC doesn't accept credit cards.

32. What do you do most often when you are bored?
Read.

33. Bedtime:
11.30pm - 12am

34. Ford or Chevy?
A Volkswagon Tourag can???

35. Lake, Ocean or River?
Ocean--best for outrigger canoeing, snorkeling, diving,
kayaking,

36. How many tattoos do you have?
None. Don't intend to get any either.

37. Which came first, the chicken or the egg?
Don't care. I just know I like to eat both.

38. Favorite Cocktail?
Dunno. Not much of a drinker.

39. Red or White wine?
Red. Then I can take my time to sip it without having to
worry about it turning warm and not being nice to drink
anymore.

40. Where would you go for a girls or boys weekend get-a-way?
Any Club Med beach resort.

恭喜发财

Happy Chinese New Year to all! Hope the year ahead will be filled with lots of good cheer, food, banter, friendship, money, romance, health etcetc. Just everything good lah!!!

I trust everyone has been eating well so far! I've been eating way too many pineapple tarts. I shouldn't, but I can't resist those lovely little things calling out to me. Also way too much kueh lapis at my friend's place last night.

Ah well, what the heck. Just eat and be merry!

Single & Ready to Mingle

Yep, that's me. I'm bored with my love life (or lack thereof really). Basically I'd just like to meet new people. But that seems really difficult!!! Seriously, how does one get to meet new people???

Perhaps I'm finally feeling the pressure as I slowly see more and more friends settling down and having kids. Just on Wed evening, I went to the hospital to visit a friend who had just given birth to a baby girl. While I was there, another friend announced she was getting married.

I often think of life as a journey on a bus. Some people on the bus travel the whole journey with us, some get up and then get off, some start off on the same journey but leave at some point, some get up at some point and never leave.

Sometimes, I feel like my bus of life is moving a lot slower than others. Yet, I also don't feel like I'm quite ready to settle down. There seems to be so many things to do and places to explore in this world. While I know what I don't want, I don't know what I want.

Frustrations at Work

Working with the mainland Chinese can be a VERY frustrating affair. In the course of my work, I deal a lot with the mainland Chinese. The frustrating thing is that they take ages to give you answers, everyone isn't willing to make a decision for fear of taking responsibility for it and they insist on clinging on the old way of doing things.

It's driving me insane and I feel like my job's hanging on the line because of these people I have to work with. Honestly, I'm worried about getting fired because even if it isn't my fault, the blame's going to be on me because they're our clients. No one's going to pity me and in a profit-driven company, who's going to give two hoots about me--one of the lowest life forms in the company?

No Television

It might surprise people to know that I hardly watch TV. Honest to god, I've never watched an episode of The Apprentice, Project Runway, Desperate Housewives, or any hit TV drama, comedy or reality series of late.

Friends have been telling me I've been missing out on A LOT. Olduvai has told me that I HAVE to watch Grey's Anatomy. OK, maybe I'll make time for this since I really like Sandra Oh.

Funny thing is that I don't really feel like I've been missing out on a lot. I'm not even sure why I've kinda lost interest in TV. It just seems like I have other things to do, so much so that I don't have time for TV. Hmm.

Historical Inaccuracies

I've been watching the Korean drama serial 大长今 Jewel in the Palace ever since my mum brought home the VCD set which her colleague had lent to her.

Anyway, despite being frustrated sometimes at the slow pace of the show, I love watching it because of all the food which is featured in the series. It's a feast for all the eyes watching the characters prepare all the food for the king and his officials in the palace kitchen. OK, I also love the lead actor Ji Jin Hee. His character is so cool and so sweet and he has such a lovely smile! *melt*

But I have a bone to pick with some historical inaccuracies. In one episode, they had an ambassador from China visit Korea. It was supposed to be set in the period of the Ming Dynasty. He was then served the 满汉全席 by one of the cooks. If one wants to be nitpicking, this technically wouldn't be possible as the 满汉全席 came into existence in the Qing Dynasty

满 refers to the Manchurians who ruled China in the Qing Dynasty. 汉 refers to the native Han people of China. The 满汉全席 is a banquet which combines the best of the cuisines and cooking styles of both groups of people.

In any case, I don't even know why the Koreans would be cooking the 满汉全席 when it's something unique to China!

Get Me Out!

I don't know how it happened, but I just found out that my blog is one of the links on a webpage titled "Sensual Mystique", and it's a webpage rounding up places where one can buy lingerie in Singapore!

Bizarre!!! I have to find a way to get my blog out of that page!!!

Shortest Fairy Tale

Once upon a time, a girl asked a guy "Will you marry me?"

The guy said, "NO!"

And the girl lived happily ever after and went shopping, dancing, camping, drank martinis, always had a clean house, never had to cook, had sex with whomever she pleased and farted whenever she wanted.

THE END

And no, i didn't write it! Mine would go something like that:

Once upon a time, a girl asked a chef (a very good one may I add) "Will you marry me?"

The guy said, "YES!"

And the girl lived happily ever after and went shopping, eating, drank wine and champagne, always had a house full of food, never had to cook, and ate whenever and whatever she wanted.

THE END

:p

Post-River Regatta

In saying that I am disappointed with the results of the weekend�s races, I think I echo the sentiments of many of my teammates. I honestly thought we would have done better.

I felt horrible when I saw the anguish and disappointment on Nick�s face after the results for one of the races were officially announced. We made it only to the semis for all the four events we were aiming for. As with all sprint events, the results were often determined by split seconds, nanoseconds, milliseconds, whatever. But whatever it was, a loss is a loss. Or in this case, losses.

I guess what shocked me personally, was how other teams we normally didn�t lose to had stepped up, improved and beaten us in this race. I don�t think we practised any less than they did, but what were they doing right that we weren�t? I still can�t quite figure out.

Anyway, that�s the short of the weekend�s competition. At least it ended on a high note with a team dinner at a coffee shop along Keong Saik Street. Putting aside the day�s disappointments, everyone made merry with a lot of beer drinking, beer drinking competitions and other silly but fun ruses. The usual jokers in the team made everyone laugh with their hilarious antics and we really brought the house down. I think the other patrons were pretty cheesed off by the noise we were making!

Afternote

Sometimes it pays to be vocal and assert your rights as a consumer. I received the email below after my angry spew in the guest comment card of hotel #3 in Beijing.

Dear Xxxx,

Thank you very much for taking the time to fill in the Guest Comment Card. I apologise to you that our staff were not flexible when an extra bottle of water was requested.

To make it more convenient for our guests, we have decided that we put 4 bottles in the rooms on Plaza Floor rooms and in all suites.

To show our care to you, I would like to upgrade you to our delux suite for your next stay. Kindly send me a email when you book your room next time.

Regards,

Ronald Ma
General Manager
Tianhong Plaza Hotel, Beijing
(Managed by Radisson Hotels & Resorts)

Ha, you'll bet I'll be emailing for my deluxe suite next time round! And I'm glad they have come round about the water!

Which Side?

When faced with a double bed, which side do you usually choose to sleep on? I don't know why, but I usually choose to sleep on the left. I just prefer it. Maybe it's because I paddle on the left in a dragonboat and I've become more partial to the left.

And now it's time for bed. Am going to jump onto the left side of my king-size bed now! And I can look forward to a decent breakfast tomorrow as well! I want to have a hearty omelette, bread, cheese, hot tea etc. You'll bet I'll stuff my face with food tomorrow morning!

Funny Job Title

I couldn't help but be amused at the job title of this job ad I came across:

Job title: Master of the Universe

A super-smart, super-fun and super-cool person is sought as the Assistant to Managing Director of Asia City Publishing Group - the region's largest provider of city living and entertainment information. This is a one-of-a-kind opportunity for a fresh graduate who is ambitious, brilliant and extremely well organized.

Showers

The world hotel association (is there such an organisation?) or whatever association that governs hotel standards should make it mandatory that all hotels around the world fit their rooms with Hansgrohe shower sets.

What's a girl gotta do to get a decent shower???

Boredom Personified

The Chinese have a really different notion of decorum. They have to thank everyone and anyone there is to thank for the holding of the conference.

I sat through one of the most boring opening addresses in my life this morning. Get this, there were probably about 10 freaking opening speeches and addresses I had to endure from various "distinguished"/"honourable" (the Chinese seem to LOVE those words) guests who all end up thanking the same people over and over again. They cannot leave out anyone. Well fair enough, 'cos it's only right to acknowledge people for their efforts. But surely once is enough???? Do we really have to get different people thanking the same people 10 times????

Like get on with it already!!!!

*rolls eyes*

The Saver

The Mother, appalled by the way I spend my money, yesterday pointed out to me an article in the papers featuring a 30-year-old man who has amassed $250,000 in total assets in just six years of working life. He has even written a book on how he did it.

So I of course go "WOW!" at his ability to amass so much moolah and went on to read to find out more.

After reading the article, I figured I would also be capable of achieving the same feat if only I:

1) Were an engineer. And one at HP to boot (I bet they have fat bonuses). I'm 100% sure that anyone in the engineering field is paid heaps more than I do.

2) Saved 60% of my take-home pay. Saving 30% is considered a feat (have yet to be achieved. eeks.) much less 60%!!! And then I would have to have a lot of luck when it comes to choosing which funds to dump my money in.

3) Ate only at McDonald's and food courts which to him are considered a luxury already. He tells me this after I spent like $100 the day before just on food. He and his girlfriend only go to fast-food eateries, food courts and hawker centres for meals. Wah, this is like torture to me.

4) Played Dungeons & Dragons with my friends as my only form of entertainment. OK, nothing against Dungeons & Dragons or Jails & Phoenixes or whatever, but there's no way I'm giving up my dragonboating, canoeing, concerts, travel, books etc. Sorry, but I don't see any work-life balance there!

5) Had a boyfriend who buys a $218 mp3 player for me and is so thrilled by the gadget that he returns to Sim Lim Square to buy a $48 one for himself. Very sweet. We do need boyfriends like that--splurge on girlfriend then spend so little on himself. Now if only this guy could just release more of his bounty.

New Clothes

Ooh, I'm wearing my new clothes today! I feel pretty! :p

And for more bimbotic fodder, please go to Slumbering Girl's entry on how to hide bodily flaws in the art of photography. Her entry cracked me up. Heehee.

Cold

Cold is the theme for Illustration Friday this week. "Cold" reminds me of:

- ice cream
- ice kachang
- snow
- my office
- aaccccchhhhoooooooo!!!!
- my cashmere coat
- snobs

Movie Lull

I haven't been to the movies in four months. I find it quite incredulous when I think about it. Maybe it's just 'cos no movie has induced a burning desire for me to want to catch it. The last movie I watched on the big screen was Batman Begins. Geesh.

After that, I caught one or two on the mini-screen. That is, inflight entertainment on board planes! I watched Sin City, Sisterhood of the Travelling Pants and The Longest Yard.

This year's selection of movies doesn't seem very good. I don't seem to recall watching anything that has really struck me as awesome. Or maybe I've just been plain lazy about making the effort to go to the movies!

The Things People Do

I don't know why my friend bothers to sms me to tell me he's back in Sg for a week and then says he's probably going to be too busy to meet up. Mad.

Silly Instructions

I find voice message recordings like that extremely dumb:
"For English, press '1'. For Chinese, press '2'..."

Like HOW would someone who doesn't understand a word of English know that he/she has to press "2" for Chinese??? I don't think these customer service people ever thought about that!

I Was Wrong

Oh OK. So I was wrong. My office server didn't ban blogspot sites after all. It was a glitch on blogspot's part. Good. I'm happy now. :)

Ban on Blogspot

I think my office server has just placed a ban on blogspot sites. There goes all my reading pleasure. Argh.

Fishy Business

As two friends and I were walking around the streets of Central, HK, we saw fishmongers scaling, skinning and slicing fish alive. It was a pretty gruesome sight as the fish's gills were still throbbing away even as its head was detached from its body. Its heart, too, was still pumping away as it lay visible in one half of its body. A Caucasian man standing behind us and watching the scene was cursing under his breath as we watched the fishmonger go about his daily ritual.

While I wouldn't be able to kill a fish like that, I won't get all riled up and moral about the whole issue 'cos hey, I eat fish. It's a vicious cycle. Supply vs Demand. So unless that guy was a vegetarian, I don't think he had a right to be so critical!

Float

Illustration Friday's theme for the week is FLOAT. I really enjoy looking at the artwork different people come up with. It's so interesting to see all the works of the talented people out there and what inspires them. I, unfortunately, am not bestowed with such talent. So what I can't translate into images, I translate into words.

When I float, I want to be high in the sky. I think of Care Bears playing in the clouds. I used to think of clouds as bouncy pads and cushions I could land on when I slide down rainbows like Care Bears do.

I want to be on a hot-air balloon and cruising over the European/Australian countryside.

I float when I'm happy. It's like I'm high on air.

I float when I'm in an outrigger canoe and riding the waves. I feel like I'm flying when the canoe is moving like a rocket.

I float when I'm in the sea wearing a life jacket.

I float when I'm in an aeroplane. When I'm on a plane that's taking off from Singapore, my heart floats 'cos I'm so happy that I'm going off to somewhere!

I float when I'm on a chocolate high. Chocolate fondue, chocolate lava cake, chocolate-dipped strawberries, chocolate whatever.

I float when I get emails and snail mails from people I really like and want to hear from.

Female ballroom dancers seem to float when they're twirled round the dance floor in their billowy skirts by their partners.

Hippos bob on the water surface.

Bubbles float in the air.

Time for Shoe Shopping

You know it's time to get a new pair of shoes when even the cobbler doesn't want to earn your money...

Fresh

The theme this week for Illustration Friday is Fresh. But as I'm hopeless when it comes to drawing, I shall instead do it with words. However, maybe I should try my hand at doodling next time. After all, it's just for fun and who cares if it's ugly? So what comes to mind when I think of the word "fresh"?

- bread that's just out of the oven
- fruit juice made by my mum
- spring water
- top-grade sashimi
- morning dew on leaves signalling the start of a new day
- a shower in the morning to wake me up
- a nice, warm shower at the end of the day to refreshen myself
- a cool summer breeze
- a dip in the sea/swimming pool on a beautiful sunny day
- the adrenalin rush as I finish a 5km run
- the lightness of my head after a wash & cut
- clean sheets
- clean towels
- the smell of a new novel
- the way a baby smells when after his/her shower
- wildflowers that have just been picked
- the smell of the earth after the rain has just passed
- mint leaves
- mountain air
- morning air
- passionfruit sorbet
- new dollar notes
- clothes just in from the laundry
- hot waffles
- cut grass

Sexism?

I have a major gripe. Female non-managerial staff have to take turns to do lunch reception duty (to relief the receptionist during her one-hour lunch break) but male non-managerial staff don't. It's a ridiculous policy which reeks of sexism.

I sent an email asking HR if there was a special reason for the exclusion of this duty. And the answer I get is: "Not being sexist, but I guess it's been known that Females (not sure why the "F" was capitalized" in that) are better suited for this?"

The words on the right side of the comma just about nullifies everything that was written on the left side. So answering a few phone calls and pressing a button to allow people to enter through the glass door IS rocket science. Woohoo, I never knew we women were so smart and accorded with such superior intelligence.

New Nation

If only there were a nation meant purely for singles to reside in�I'd be the first to emigrate there. Now why did that thought hit me?

Over the weekend, I bumped into two very pregnant friends and also attended the marriage registration ceremony of a friend. The ceremony was held at an unusual location. He chose to have it in the Spinelli's coffee outlet along Robinson Road, right in the heart of the Central Business District. When he first told me of the location, I went, "WHY????"

His answer took me by surprise as I had never thought him capable of such a romantic gesture. I used to regard him as a really nice but terribly boring guy to talk to! OK lah, I know I'm very terrible. He said it was because that Spinelli's outlet was where they first met hence it would be nice to have the registration ceremony held there.

And so, I had to drive into the very-deserted-on-Sundays Shenton Way. The small cafe was done up nicely with silver and pink balloons lining the ceiling and the ribbon tails trailing down. Tealights put in bowls filled with red and pink rose petals were placed on every table and lots of finger food around (food wasn't fantastic btw).

In a way, I admire my friends who are brave enough to take the step towards marriage. And I am happy for them that they've found someone whom they want to spend the rest of their lives with. But I find myself still not ready to undertake such big commitments such as marriage, buying a flat and having babies. Perhaps my time will come, or not? Don't know...

Mysterious SMS

A mysterious sms I got from an unknown number last night: "亲爱的, 我到家了我等你回来!"

[Translated: My dearest, I'm home already and I'm waiting for you to come home!]

For one moment, I thought I got myself a lover I didn't know about. Hehheh. But obviously, it was from someone who had keyed in the wrong phone number. And my guess is that was written by a woman. Don't you think so? It sounds more like something written by a woman rather than a man.

Anyway, I didn't reply to say that she had gotten the wrong number so that she could resend the sms. I hope I didn't cause any argument to break out between this couple because of that!

Tagged

Since I got tagged by two people, I suppose I really have to do this. So here goes:

List three random facts about yourself that your friends might not know. And then tag five other friends to do it.

1) I have stopped drinking milk since the age of three. Don't ask me why. I just don't like the smell of milk and things that are too creamy and milky. Milkshakes are a no-no for me. I drink tea without milk. When I eat cereal (something I hardly do really), I do so without milk. But I'm not lactose intolerant.

2) As much as a sweet tooth I've got when it comes to chocolates (dark ones only!!!), pastries, cakes and desserts of all sorts, I don't eat sweets. Strange but true. I don't eat candy, bubblegum, licorice or whatever sweets of any sorts. I think this stems from the fact that I was not allowed to eat any sweets as a kid. My mother banned it from my diet.

3) I'm extremely particular about the toothpaste I use. I only use the brand Fluocaril, 'cos this one doesn't have the mint taste which every other toothpaste brand seems to have. I hate the taste of mint.

I'm not going to tag anyone since all the people I can tag have either been tagged or have done it already!

Expenditure

My mother thinks it's impossible for someone to spend about $1500 a month. She asked me what my monthly expenditure was and I said probably between $1500 - $1700 and she totally flipped. "Huh?????" She went. "How can anyone spend so much money in a month???"

Err, mum, I'm really not THAT bad. There are many others who spend much more indiscriminately than I do (not that I spend indiscriminately ok). But anyway, I think that's how much I spend. I never really keep track of my expenditure. I just know that I'm not in the red and don't have credit card overdrafts with the banks.

I haven't seen my savings go up very much 'cos I've been travelling quite a bit. So what do I spend on?

1) Food (evidently.)
2) Transport (Bus, MRT, Taxi. The latter being the main consumer of my money.)
3) Entertainment
4) Shopping (refer to previous post for latest purchases)
5) Hair (I cut my hair every month. Yes, it grows THAT fast. And I colour it every three months or so.)
6) Bills (Handphone, credit card, etc)
7) Toiletries and cosmetics
8) Travel (this being where most of my money goes to!)

So there. It's so easy to spend that kind of money. I don't know why my mum's so surprised. And I know she's reading this. Heh.

What's In a Name?

Do you actually grow into your name? This is supposedly who I am according to my name.

You are idealistic and intelligent and very much an all or nothing person.Tending to experience constant change in life security is found in your real and abiding values. With great organisational ability, industry and creative prowess you love to build tangible results and are especially gifted at transforming lost causes. Your intelligence is marked with keen perception and analytical ability. A secure home life and relationship are important for you.

Go here and find out what's yours.

Thanks to olduvai for the link!

Creation

There's something extremely satisfying about creating something out of your own hands. In doing so, you know that there's no other like it in the entire world. I guess that's why I like things like writing, photography, pottery and decoupage. I've tried my hand at all of these. Been a little lazy with photography and decoupage though. I used to do quite a lot of decoupage last time and gave whatever I decorated to friends as presents.

Pottery classes have also been pretty fun. Though my pieces are really ugly, I still think it's fun making things. Writing is also something very personal and to know that a paragraph exists because I've somehow strung words together gives me great satisfaction too. I think this is exactly how chefs feel too about their cooking.

Anyway, I've decided that I want to learn how to make pyjamas pants for myself. I was at Marks & Spencer on Friday night and I just couldn't resist it--I bought the overpriced pyjamas pants I was eyeing the other day. Huge indulgence but oh well, I had to have it! But I've since resolved to stop buying anymore. Instead, I'll attempt to make some of my own with some supervision from my mummy. We'll see if my grand plans come to fruition...

My Religion

I read with surprise in the Straits Times couple of weeks ago that about 86% of Singaporeans have a religion. I didn't expect that high a percentage. But of course, Straits Times surveys aren't always the most accurate. I would be more apt to believe the statistics if these were results released by the censors.

Well, let's just assume this Straits Times survey is fairly accurate. It surprised me to learn that I'm one of those 14% who has no religion. Even then, supposedly 70% of those who said they had no religion believed that god exists.

Me? I'm the pagan girl. My family's non-religious and efforts on the part of my friends to get me to attend church have been futile. I don't profess true atheism, so I will just say that I'm agnostic. But oh, the next time someone asks, can I just say that food is my religion? And the only cardinal rule is that to not eat and enjoy food is a sin????

Maybe I should start compiling my own 10 commandments:
1) Chocolate (especially dark ones for me!) must never be refused whenever offered.
2) Invitations to breakfast/lunch/dinner should never be refused.
3) Thou shall try, whenever possible, to eat for pleasure and not sustenance.
4) There's ALWAYS room for dessert.
5) The phrase "I'm on a diet" is blasphemous.
6) Carbohydrates are good. To hell with Atkin's.
7) Eat your greens.
8) Dairy, especially in the form of ice cream, is good for you!
9) Never date or marry anyone who doesn't like to eat.
10) Eat everything twice!

Please feel free to add to the list! ;p

Blog Banner

To slumbering girl, yes, I specially styled the shoot for the blog. Glad you like it. :)

You see, I've been bored with my blog's appearance for the longest time and have been thinking of how to update it. Anyway, inspiration finally struck on Saturday and on Sunday morning, I transformed my room into a makeshift studio for an impromptu photo shoot.

Gathering some props around the house, I set up this little arrangement. Let me give a little introduction to the items in the picture.

1) The potted plant--one of my mum's darlings in the balcony. I managed to keep it alive during the time my parents were away.

2) The book titled "five-fold happiness". It's a book written by Australian Chinese author Vivien Sung. An attractively laid-out book, it's a bilingual book explaining the meanings behind traditional Chinese motifs and symbols.

3) The doll is one which I've had for about 20 years. My dad bought it for me from Hong Kong about 20 years. She has a baby too which she carries on her back with the help of one of those Chinese wraps. Very cute.

4) The bamboo steamer she sits on is a free gift from one of my mum's office function. It was a container for some door/corporate gift.

5) The four dimsum magnets were given to me by good friends Joe and Keith. They got it for me in Hong Kong and from left is the 莲蓉包 (lotus paste buns)， 烧卖 (siew mai)， 虾饺 (har gow) and 叉烧包 (roast pork buns). I just adore these cute little magnets!

6) The fish bowl and chopsticks (this pair was bought in Chiangmai) are crockery I usually use at home!

7) The teapot is from our tea set. It comes with two small cups which I excluded here 'cos I thought the composition would be a bit too cluttered if I had included them.

8) The peranakan basket was from some gift ages ago. We kept it 'cos we thought it looked nice as a decorative item in the house. My mum sometimes places a potted plant in there. During Chinese New Year, it will be filled with mandarin oranges.

So there was my little effort in doing some styling for a photo shoot. I think it's kinda fun. I would like to work in some lifestyle magazine like Good Living, Martha Stewart or something llike that, and get to do such things!

But then I realised, when downloading the photos, that I had forgotten that I needed a photo in panaromic format. The dimensions of this picture don't make the webpage look very aesthetically pleasing. But I thought since I had already done it, I might as well just put it up for a while until I think of something better. Heh. One must also realise that my tech skills and knowledge are almost non-existent!

Latched-Key Dogs

Now I can understand the guilt that plagues working parents when they find that they're not spending enough time with their children because of work commitments. I'm feeling the same towards my two dogs.

I know it's silly, but I feel obligated to stay home with them as much as possible with none of my family members in Singapore at the moment. In the past couple of days, they seem especially happy to see me whenever I return home.

So anyway, I have been spending as much time as I can with them. Dogs are social animals and they need companionship. To deprive them of that would be cruel! In any case, I've been enjoying my time alone at home and having the place to myself. :)

Angmoh Pai

You know what I find hilarious? That many people get the impression that I don't understand and/or speak Chinese. Several colleagues have asked if I speak and/or understand the language. I just got the question the on Monday from Colleague A when I was chatting together with her and Colleague B. She was asking if I had trouble communicating when I went to China.

When Colleague B heard the question (she had asked the same question about a year ago), she laughed and told Colleague A that I speak and write better Chinese than the both of them! While I'm not very good in Chinese, I'm not such a basket case either. Not that terok OK!

Last night during a company dinner, I got the question again from Colleague C. She went, "Do you have any problems speaking Chinese?" I said, "No. Why do you ask?" And she goes, "Don't take this the wrong way, but there are just some people who look like they can't utter a word of Chinese to save their lives and you just happen to look like that."

Well, I wasn't offended or anything, 'cos she's not the first one to say that. Later in the night, Colleague D said the same thing to me! Geez.

I have no idea why people would think I don't understand/speak Chinese when I obviously went through the same educational system as they did. For the record, I did pass my Chinese exams (and it was no fluke!). I mean seriously, do I really appear so kantang? That's "potato" in Malay--a word I only came to know after someone used it on me when I was staying in the hostel in uni. I was labelled as being in the "angmoh pai" (English party) too. Hmmm.

When it comes to language and words, I can say that it's my cup of tea. But give me numbers, and it's like throwing me into the throes of hell. Seriously, it just kills me. Of late, I have had to draw up budget estimates and make sure figures tally in the budget sheets and costing etc, for work. I really hate doing it. It causes the death of my brain cells. And now it's back to the drawing board. :(

Near is Far

After going to China a few times, I've come to realise that Singaporeans' (mine at least) concept of distance differs quite greatly from that of the Chinese nationals.

My colleague in China will tell me that so-and-so place is really close to so-and-so place. And I will hop on a taxi and after 10 minutes I still find myself in a taxi. I'll probably have to wait another 15 to 20 minutes before I reach my destination. And I'm thinking "What??? You call this near???" According to my colleague, anything within half an hour's ride is considered near to her.

Because of Singapore's small size, "near" is somewhere within a 5 to 10 minute walk/drive. Anything beyond that is not near. Haha.

But I guess one adjusts one's mindset accordingly if you live in China. In Shanghai, I was staying with a friend who was an exchange student in Shanghai. After being there for six months, she slowly began to change her definition of near and far. I found that out because she said she'd take me for lunch somewhere nearby on the day I arrived. After walking for 10 minutes, we still hadn't arrived at the eatery. And I asked her, "I thought you said it was near???" It was another 15 minutes before we got to the place. I nearly died of hunger by then. Haha.

And when you ask for directions, the locals tend to make it sound like your intended destination is really close by. They'll say something like "你拐个弯就到了." (Just turn round the corner and you'll reach). To me, it sounded like it's just like 20m away. But no, it's more like 2000m!

So yeah, for Singaporeans, please have your concept of "near" readjusted when you go to China.

Tough to Tango

How does one go about indicating one's interest, but yet not making it sssooooo obvious such that one can be let down more gently (and feel less embarrassed) should the other party not reciprocate?

The male�female dance is a hard one to master. Put your foot out too much and you might just fall flat on your face. Yet if you don't move those feet, you'll be staying put at the exact spot.

Tough.

Vanity Mirror

'Fess up those of you who can't help but check yourself out when you walk past a reflective surface. Oh come on, not even a cursory glance? Don't bluff ok!

I admit I'm one of those vain people who can't help but just take a glance at myself and check if anything's amiss when I walk past a reflective surface. But of course, I won't preen myself as if I'm in the privacy of my room or the restroom. That's a bit ttoooo much lah, huh?

But I think it's just human instinct. We're all conditioned to be vain lah, come on. Just depends on the degree of vanity that's all! So I do have some degree of girliness in me! ;p

Squirmy Squealy Women

I think I've said this more than once before; while I'm a girl's girl, I'm not a girly girl. Like I have plenty of good girlfriends whom I can't imagine living without, but I HATE it when I'm with women who get all squirmy, squealy and giggly. Aarrggghhh...it just irritates the hell out of me!!!

You know how some women squeal "Oooooohhhh, that's ssssooooooooo cute!!!!" in their high-pitched voices. Or they go asking some other friend "So hoooowwwww's the [wedding] dress?" (not mine lah!) in their oh-so-sweet voices and looking all bright-eyed and artificially bouncy. And then they'll move on to talking about shopping in Bangkok. *yawn*

Otherwise, they'll start making a big deal about how it's weird to share a hotel room with a good guy friend when travelling together (obviously we share to save costs lah!). Like please, stop all these narrowmindedness!

I'm sorry, I just can't summon up any enthusiasm for such things and stupid talk! And you would think these people who are all highly educated professionals would be capable of more intelligent conversation! Obviously these women I'm talking about are not my can't-live-without-them girlfriends!

The Beginnings of a Foodie

As you can see, my foodie ambitions started at an early age! Here I am, donkey years ago, standing in front of the fridge munching on some cake. I can't remember what the occasion was. Either it was my sister's or my birthday party, I think.

Having a quencher on a tram in Genting Highlands. I was three back then and it was my first trip overseas! I think that's when the travel bug bit. I used to have this mushroom hairstyle as a kid. Yes, I call it the "Mushroom Head" 'cos don't you think it resembles one??? Anyway, my mum had my sister and I keep a mushroom head when we were wee little things. But quite cute lah, right?

Tautology

The bad thing about dealing with words is that one tends to get paranoid with other people's use of words.

A colleague just sent an email notifying the company about someone's new portfolio and jobscope. I quote:

"With immediate effect, XX will take on new added responsibilities, in addition to his existing solutions consultant's role for Asia..."

My bone of contention is with the words "new added". WHY bother using both words when either one would have conveyed the desired meaning? Argh...I can't stand the use of unnecessary words.

Tautology, defined as the "needless repetition of the same sense in different words; redundancy" (dictionary.com), is an editor's greatest nightmare!

Ok, I know I'm becoming a bit neurotic. heh.

Unwilling to use "will"

I think a colleague of mine has this thing against the word "will". I don't know what "will" did to her such that she never uses it when it's supposed to be used.

E.g. We would be organising a family outing on XX Month 2005.

She does this ALL the time, and I must admit, it's slightly grating on this editor's eyes. But of course, I'm not about to march up to her or send an email to correct her grammar.

But I just heard one of my colleagues (who's also an editor) express irritation at her constant incorrect usage of "would". I heard him say to another editor that he's going to tell her about it! Hmm...whether he's really going to do it or not I wouldn't know until the next email comes along! haha.

Sleep Matters

A friend returned my earlier call to her at 11.30 last night and I told her I couldn't talk 'cos I was about to go to bed. To which she said "So disgusting!!!" And I'm like, "What's so disgusting about that???"

Obviously to her it was way too early an hour to hit the sack. But I don't reckon so. Anyway, I didn't go to bed straight away. I chatted awhile with my mummy and sis before having my mummy switch off the lights at about 11.45pm. It's such a loving and parently act, isn't it? This switching off of the lights in the room. Hee.

I'm trying to make an effort to go to bed between 11.30 and 12 as I think it makes for a healthier lifestyle. I've never been much of a nightbird. I'm not a pub or clubbing kind of person. I feel like a fish out of water at those joints. But ask me to wake up in the morning (not tttooooo early of course) for some morning jog/hike/tennis game and I'll be up for it! I'm definitely a day person.

My sleep's important to me�I usually need about 6�7 hours of it to function properly. Inadequate sleep leaves me looking like a panda with all the dark eye circles and I just feel sluggish. When that happens, I'm not a happy person and I don't work well. And I don't rely on caffeine for a pick-me-up as I don't drink coffee. So when I'm sleepy I listen to my body and go rest.

And when I sleep, I'd prefer not to dream. Usually dreaming leaves my head feeling heavy when I awake and I feel like I haven't had a good rest. Thankfully I don't dream much. I try not to think too much before sleeping and moreover, I'm usually exhausted enough such that dreams don't come at night. When I do dream, I *think* (I can't really remember!) I dream in black and white. I don't remember vivid colours in any of my dreams. Maybe I should have some dream journal (yes, there are actually such journals around!) put at the side of my bed.

And speaking of sleeping, I really feel I should still be in bed instead of the office 'cos it's raining and such cool weather's perfect for sleeping in!

Problem is...

My sis sent this quote to me over msn quite some time ago:

You know you're in love when you can't fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams. ~ Dr. Seuss

To which I replied: "Problem is I'm falling asleep every night!"

I Think That's Me

I was flipping through a magazine and here's what was written of a November female. Actually it was pertaining to a dog...but nevermind, you can call me a bitch, I don't care. Ha. I couldn't help but think that they were writing about me though:

"November is a food lover...indulging in only good food, and is often known as the connoissuer. Thanksgiving is her favourite day. However, do not tell her that she is plump."

;p

Words I Dread

Here's a list of words I dread to hear in conversations whenever there are soon-to-be married or married friends around. And for the benefit of readers unfamiliar with Singapore, there are further explanations.

- Punggol / noun / this is a suburb where many new government flats are located. Many newly married couples have bought flats here.

- Seng Kang / noun / (same explanation as above)

- ROM / noun / the acronym for the Registry of Marriages. It can also be used as a verb. E.g. I am going to ROM this Saturday. It just means I'm going to register my marriage this Saturday.

- marry, marriage, married / verb, noun, adjective / Pretty self-explanatory I think

- wedding photographer / noun / There's almost always talk of who was the photographer of so-and-so's wedding and so-and-so would like to get the same one 'cos the latter liked the former's wedding photos.

- HDB flats / noun / Housing Development Board flats. In other words, government-built flats in Singapore

- wedding packages / noun / The things that bridal studios try to con couples into forking out money for. Pushy sales persons are a common complaint.

- hotel ballroom / noun / The venue of almost all wedding banquets. The discussion of hotel ballroom layouts has become an integral part of conversations. Is it L-shaped? Rectangular? How big is it? *yawn*

- condominium / noun / The home of choice for the couples with a more substantial pay cheque and combined income compared to the rest of their peers.

- baby / noun / A small human being which is cute only in the first six years of its existence. After that, it metamorphises into a monster.

- kid / noun / You talking about me??? I don't think I've evolved very much from that mental state.

Zaftig

Ladies, the next time someone says you're fat, say "No, I'm just 'zaftig'."

See if that word throws the person off his/her feet if your gut instinct to deliver a punch in the face hasn't already done so. heh.

The word "zaftig" (pronounced: zahf-tig) is an adjective meaning having a full rounded figure or pleasingly plump. So from now on, I shall go around saying I'm a "zaftig beauty". Haha.

I've always thought I was born in the wrong century. I should have been born in the Renaissance period or something--where womanly curves were adored, being zaftig was the fashion, and the Rubenesque woman worshipped. I would have been the rage of the season. ;p

I need a time travel machine!!!

Be a Gatecrasher?

Maybe it's 'cos I've been editing too much at work. Too much of it has left me bereft of the ability to write. Tis a real tragedy. *sob*

I've been asked by a good friend to do a short writeup for her cafe for promotional purposes. But I can't seem to come up with anything decent. I look at my string of words and I cringe and recoil in horror. But hopefully I'll be able to come up with something soon.

In any case, moving on to another trivial topic, I was reading in Life! yesterday about how single Singaporean women are going over to HK on organised tours to meet single Hong Kong men. And over this upcoming Vesak Day weekend, there are going to be quite a few batches making their way up. A quote from the owner of the company which organises these trips says that HK men are more persistent than their Singaporean counterparts. Singaporean men, supposedly, give up too easily--one rejection and they back down. HK men, on other hand, are supposedly not so easily rebuffed. So yet again, Singaporean men are upstaged by their foreign counterparts. If it's not the gweilo then it's their Hong Kong cousins. They have my sympathies. Then again, no. They in turn are always comparing us Singaporean women with the supposedly less demanding Malaysian women, the sweeter and more demure Thais, Vietnamese etc. So I suppose it's only fair that they get compared too. heh.

Since I'm going to be in HK over that weekend (No, i'm not one of those who signed up) because of work (I'm returning from Beijing via HK), I may very well chance upon one of these single parties if I happen to be at Lan Kwai Fung! Maybe I should gatecrash a party and see if the claims are really true! Haha!

I Need a Muse

Or better still, muses. My mind's a blank. I'm suffering from blogger's block. I'm hereby asking for muse candidates. Anyone from any race, creed, or age may apply. If you think you're a muse worthy person, step right up.

Ideas?

I always wonder where do columnists get ideas from? Like how do ideas spring from their minds and then flow onto paper? What if you had an extremely boring week and you have absolutely nothing to write? What are you going to tell your editor?

So I guess the trick is to make something out of nothing. Columnists must really want to pull their hair out when they're hard-pressed for words. I think the trick here is to be observant--really notice the things around you. I think one of the marks of good writers is that they are sensitive to their surroundings and environment. More importantly, they are able to transpose their thoughts and feelings onto paper, bringing readers into their world effortlessly.

So what am I getting at? I don't know. I write this on Sunday 13 March. I shall save this entry as a draft and post it when I have absolutely no idea what to write. heh.

Skirting the Issue

One of my colleagues has noticed that I never wear skirts to work. Yep, she's observant.

Come to think of it, I hardly wear skirts. Somehow I think I don't look very good in them. Also, it's so much easier to move around in pants. I'm quite "kor lor" (un-ladylike) and if I were to wear a tight pencil skirt, I can't walk fast or take big steps when I need to.

I sometimes like to sit cross-legged in the office too. I know, it looks terribly unprofessional. But no one bothers me downstairs in the basement office and I'm tucked away in my little cubicle. The few other colleagues with me in the office never bother coming round as well. I'm holed up in a world of my own. So yes, I'm most comfortable trudging around in pants. Makes me look taller too! heehee.

And if you could see my work attire today, you probably wouldn't think I was going to work. Especially not in Shenton Way. Perhaps I'm just playing up Urban's stereotype of how badly dressed (compared to women in Raffles Place) Shenton Way's women are. Gosh, that was such a silly and brainless article which appeared last week. Urban has seriously run out of things to write about.

Anyway, I could pass off as a student--a black V-neck tank top with white trimmings around the sleeves and neckline, and with seven white silhouettes of Emily the Strange across the front, jeans, and a pair of faux black and white bowling shoes. And I carried a white sling bag with me. As you can see, I take my company's casual Fridays policy very seriously.

On a related note, I read in today's issue of Life! about how some teenagers are spending thousands of dollars buying underground clothes brands. Forsaking usual brand names like Gucci and Prada, they're going for underground brands such as Bathing Ape and Neighborhood. The amount of money these teenagers spend is appalling and obscene for people who aren't even spending their own money. All these prodigal sons and daughters! I would so slaughter my kid if he squandered my money like that.

Anyhow, it's Friday! TGIF!!!

New Entrant

OK, now that all the unpleasantness is over, I'm ready to move on with my blog. Some people just don't have any idea of the subtleties of language.

While I welcome differing view and comments, I think it's important that words are chosen carefully and tact be used especially when addressing a bunch of people one doesn't know well. Well, it's a rather unfortunate incident and while I don't feel good that I had to turn antagonistic on someone, I think some people just need to be put in their place.

Anyhow, it's been really stressful during this period of time due to work. I have several books due out next week and I'm just rushing to finish up all the odd bits and ends. Argh. So late nights at the office, awful dinners (I just hate eating for sustenance) and more dark eye circles to decorate my face. There's going to be a new addition to the Panda enclosure at the zoo with a new entrant called Panda Dolly. Get ready to welcome the new sensation. Panda Dolly is unusual because she doesn't like eating bamboo like the rest of her kind. Instead, she likes gourmet food that humans go for. However, she's now round and fat due to too much sitting around and eating of lousy food laden with oil and MSG. The zoo is asking for donations to feed Panda Dolly's unusual but expensive taste.

Cover Girl

Do you judge a book by its cover? I do. So what does that say of me? That I�m a superficial being? Perhaps so. But come on, covers help to sell like it or not. Why else do you think magazine editors agonise day and night over who or what should be on the next issue�s cover? And an attractive book cover would certainly help to sell books. After all, why put a sultry looking Gwyneth Paltrow on the cover of Great Expectations and not have it as a boring 18th or 19th century painting?

I admit�I�m a sucker for attractive and nice book covers. I�d be willing to pay more just for a cover I liked even though the content is exactly the same as that of another book with a less appealing cover. I mean, it's always nice to look at something more aesthetically pleasing and more visually appealing, isn't it? And also, since it�s going to sit pretty on my book shelf, it�d better look pretty. heh.

Mix of Characters

I had dinner with a group of girlfriends on Friday night and we got to discussing which Sex & the City character we were. We were also trying to figure out which characters our other friends (who weren't present) were.

Anyway, we never quite came to a conclusion as we figured we were all a mixture of each character. Then we also figured that Sex & the City is now pass�. Now it's which Desperate Housewife are you???

I've never watched an episode of the series though I know my sis and many of my girlfriends enjoy it. I don't know why, I'm just not very inclined on watching it. But maybe I should since most of my trusted girlfriends love it. According to this quiz, I am "Lynette Scavo, the ex-career woman who traded the boardroom for boredom, mixed with moments of sheer panic as the mother of four unmanageable kids". Dear trusted girlfriends who watch the show, please tell me if this is true??? A mother of four unmanageable kids??? I hope not! Help!

But I haven't even finished watching SATC! Argh...that's how slow I am.

In any case, I think I would be a mixture of Carrie, Charlotte and Miranda but definitely not the alpha female Samantha--though I think Samantha is cool. I like her devil-may-care attitude and her brazen streak.

Like Carrie, I love shoes. But I'm not so bad already ok. I have friends who are much worse than me! Let me digress a little here--I would have you know that I have a friend who on Saturday, just brought 50 pairs of shoes to sell at a flea market to sell. That means she probably has another 50 stashed at home. And many of my girlfriends have just as many shoes. So I AM normal. It's just wrong for a woman to have less than 10 pairs of shoes ok! And I maintain my stand on that opinion. Heh.

Carrie's love for writing is something I share. Like Charlotte, I'm somewhat idealistic when it comes to love. Like Miranda, I don't have much tolerance for nonsense and am independent. Perhaps too independent. My cousin remarked the other day that she couldn't imagine anyone taking care of me. Like fantastic, right?

On a separate note, when I got home from work yesterday, I bumped into my neighbours who were a couple around my parents' age. So I did the polite thing and greeted "Uncle" and "Auntie". And Auntie goes "Wah, almost didn't recognise you! So ladylike!"

Right...Hmm ok, so it looks like I've been really scruffy and cuo lor (meaning not very well-groomed). The bizarre thing is that I didn't have a trace of makeup on. Must be the work clothes. Looked very executive-like. Haha.

Anyway, enough ramblings and nonsense.

Urbanite

Today's issue of URBAN, the fashion and beauty supplement of The Straits Times that comes with it every Thursday, had an article on dressing rooms--like what makes a good and bad one and they interviewed people to ask them which ones they thought were good.

But wait a minute. I wrote about that ages ago! I say I'm more urban than URBAN, thank you very much!

What's With the Weather?

Seriously, what's with this incessant rain at this time of the year??? It's just terribly annoying! It's not supposed to be raining so much! It's just spoiling all my fun!

*moping*

In the Driver's Seat

It's just as well I don't have a car to drive to work in the mornings. I'm such a zombie that should I drive, I'd be a road hazard. While I am pretty much a day person, my brain really only starts functioning after about 9.30am.

I stone in the bus in the mornings. I enjoy stoning. I enjoy observing people on board the bus and looking at the people and things on the streets. I look at other women's shoes and go green with envy if I see a pair I like. Sometimes I read on the bus too if I can get a seat.

But don't be mistaken. I do enjoy driving. I love whisking myself from one place to another. It's that sense of independence I enjoy. And I love listening to my music and just singing along to it when I'm alone in the car.

One of my dreams is to drive an open-top four-wheel drive or a sports car convertible and cruise down the Great Ocean Road in Australia. That would be awesome. Dream dream dream. One day, I must do a road trip like that!

And on a separate but somewhat related topic, would you consider a guy a loser if he doesn't know how to drive? I was listening to morning radio on Class 95 and DJ Glen Ong remarked that he thinks guys who don't know how to drive are losers.

OK, while I admit that I enjoy seeing a guy behind the wheel and find it kinda sexy to see a guy maneuvering his own vehicle, it seems somewhat extreme to call a guy who doesn't know how to drive a loser! But what do you think? Is a guy less of a man if he doesn't know how to drive?

Missed Lunch Appointment

I've learnt that it's probably best not to make lunch appointments with friends who are lawyers. Most likely, they're going to cancel at the last minute, or forget to turn up at all--which was what happened to me just now. A week ago, the same person cancelled on me because of a last minute meeting.

Was supposed to meet this friend for lunch at Lau Pa Sat and when I got there at the appointed time, I gave her a call only to hear her say, "Oh no, I forgot about lunch! I have a last minute meeting to go to. Sorry ah. Can we meet another day??" I was pissed off, so I sarcastically replied, "Do we have a choice?"

Gggggrrrrr.

Boys Not Men

I must be getting old. I was flipping through the issue of Cleo with this year's 50 Most Eligible Bachelors and none of them appealed to me. Why? Just 'cos they were too young. Those were boys not men! If I were several years younger, perhaps more would have appealed to me. Many of them were in their late teens (well ok, 19) to mid-20s. Aiyah, too immature lah. How can call this eligible???

I was supposed to go to the Cleo Bachelor Party on Thursday night with olduvai and slumbering girl until I discovered that I had to go to Bebel Gilberto instead (obviously I didn't buy the tickets). I was under the impression that the concert was on Friday night and was all eager to go and see these men make a fool themselves in front of screaming teenagers when I discovered my mistake after a reminder from my friend to appear at the Esplanade on Thursday night. Like dammit. I would have gladly traded Bebel for some bachelors if not for the fact that I had paid $60 for the ticket. So my dreams of a night full of eye-candy were dashed. Darn.

How Do Men See You?

Men See You As Playful

Men want a challenge and you are the perfect playmate.
You know how to push men's buttons and attract a wide range of guys
You enjoy living and loving - it's one of your most attractive qualities.
Men are often consumed with desire for you, and you love that!

Yeah right...so where have all these supposed men in my life gone? I must have proven to be too much of a challenge...

Ladies, go here to take the quiz. Thanks to slumbering girl for the link!

Positivity & Negativity

I think people who are very negative are noxious. It's like they exude bad karma, bad vibes and negative energy. I have a colleague who's very negative--always dissing things and saying this and that is bad or that she doesn't like something even without having given the thing a chance.

Last week, I said to her over lunch that I wanted to go to Japan. And then she went, "I don't like going to countries which don't speak English." I couldn't believe it when I heard that! And she dismisses ever visiting China 'cos she pronounces the Chinese people and their eating practices as barbaric (she's vegetarian). I think she might as well just forget about visiting anywhere if she wants to find a place that's completely vegetarian.

And on Tuesday, she asked if I was going to an upcoming company function. I said yes, 'cos the event sounded like fun! To which she went "Eeeee, you going for such things ah? I don't like." At that point, I got pretty pissed off at such perpetual displays of negativity. And I just said to her, "Why are you being so negative??" But she didn't reply and I just left it as that as I went to buy my lunch.

I get fed up whenever I'm around such people. They just spoil my good spirits. And if I'm in a foul mood, they only serve to make me feel worse. While I don't expect people to be like bouncy springs all the time, I think her kind of negativity stems from narrowmindedness and the unwillingness to give things/people a chance. It's highly annoying. I also hate the kind of sweeping statements she makes at times.

I think it's important that we surround ourselves with happy and positive people. On my part, I try to be as happy and positive as possible. Of course, I have my low days and I can be a bitch at times. But for the most part, I try to be happy. And I think happy and positive people attract people who are likewise, and the world just seems like a better place when everyone's in good spirits. Don't you think so?

Dreams

"Is it very bad to not have dreams?" asks my friend. I was stumped 'cos I had thought EVERYONE had dreams.

"I don't have dreams of anything I want to achieve. At least you can say you want to be a travel writer. But I don't know what I want," says my friend.

This friend of mine is caught in a bigger quarter-life crisis than I am. She's looking for a job after quitting teaching. The rowdy boys and bureaucracy got to her and she decided to up and go--her childhood dream of becoming a teacher shattered by the realities of the situation.

But while she knows what she does NOT want (e.g. sales jobs), she does not know what she wants. Hence her difficulty when answering questions like "Where do you see yourself in five years' time?" "Why do you think you'd be good at this job?" "What do you want to do?", at interviews she has gone to so far.

Nothing much I can do to help her really, except tell her to identify her strengths, weaknesses and interests.

But back to her first question. So is it really bad to not have dreams? I mean, at least a dream represents hope, right? And in many situations in life, isn't hope the only thing that really keeps the human spirit alive?

Inconsiderate Being

*Warning�bimbotic rant ahead*

Ok, I�ve resisted commenting on this but now I simply can�t take it anymore! I have a colleague who�s terribly inconsiderate�he wears absolutely hideous shirts on Fridays! I say he�s ruining the general aesthetics of the office. We have a casual Fridays policy and come Friday I�ll �look forward� to seeing what grotesque shirts he comes up with.

I swear he would make it to Mr. Blackwell�s list of worst-dressed men of the year. The other week he came in this bright blue T-shirt with yellow gecko prints on it. I nearly choked on my morning tea when I saw it. Today�s a shirt with red paisley prints. Seriously I don�t think paisley prints quite work on men. His wardrobe needs a major overhaul.

He should be relegated to the storeroom.

Esplanade Bridge

I love going across the Esplanade Bridge which links the Esplanade to the CBD. The bus I take to work drives across the bridge every day and I'll always look out of the window whenever it does. It's something I never fail to do.

There's something very soothing to the soul about looking out to a calm body of water. As the bus drives past, the water glistening in the morning sun is a beautiful sight. On rainy mornings, it just makes me wistful looking out of the window. On the left is the prickly Esplanade (the world's biggest Durian), the Sheares Bridge in the middle and on the right is the Merlion spouting an endless stream of water.

The Merlion btw, is to me, the most overrated tourist attraction and icon of Singapore. I mean, WHAT kind of icon is this??? This half-lion half-fish creature is so ugly. Apparently, the idea is that the lion head represents the fabled beast that supposedly once roamed Singapore and the fish part represents Singapore's origins as a sea town. I wished they had just stuck with the lion. At least that's more majestic. I don't have any affection whatsoever for this creature which seems to have won the hearts of many tourists. Every day, I see so many tourists milling around, waiting to get their shot of the Merlion. All I can say is that the people at the Singapore Tourism Board have done their job.

The Merlion at Sentosa is the ugliest of all. Btw, did you know there are two Merlions at the One Fullerton side? One big one and a miniature one. It's a baby Merlion! Anyway, the one at Sentosa is humongous and it looks absolutely demonic at night with coloured lights coming out from its eyes.

But I've digressed. I just meant to say that I really like going across, whether walking or driving, the Esplanade Bridge.

My Dream Study

I NEED a library of my own. My shelves have no more space for books and I'm absolutely devastated. I NEED (ok fine, it's a 'want') to buy more books. If I had my own place, I would have lots of book shelves in place. There would also be a magazine rack in the toilet. The kitchen would have a shelf for cookbooks and books related to gastronomy.

My book shelves will be categorised according to genre. There will be Literature & General Fiction, Photography, Architecture & Design, Health & Body, Plays & Screenplays, Chinese books (yes, I do have a few!), Non-fiction, Children's books (not for my children but for myself! I still have some books from childhood). But knowing me, I doubt these categories would work 'cos I would be strewning my books all over and chucking them whenever's most convenient. It's probably more fun like that anyway. Makes the book collection look more eclectic and I'd have more fun browsing the shelves.

If the library is big enough, it will have a ladder running along the row of shelves. You know one of those ladders which allows you to climb up and reach for the books on the highest shelf? Yes, that would be so cool!

Wooden shelves would be best. The wood would be of a soft brown colour. Maybe cypress would be good heh? The faint aroma of cypress filling the study would be so welcoming and soothing to the senses!

A study with a skyroof would be lovely too. In the day, the blue sky and clouds would be visible with sunlight streaming into the study. At night, I would be able to look up and see the stars. There will be windows all around the study so that sunlight and the breeze can stream in. Best if it looks out to the beach, lake or some lovely spot of greenery.

My work desk would have to be big. A sturdy wooden table--Australian Jarrah wood maybe? Love its rich, warm colour. It's also very durable. Its grain is also straight which is what I would like for a work desk. It has to have a good number of drawers 'cos I will have lots of stationery. I'm a sucker for stationery. A sleek widescreen powerbook will be on the desk as well.

A good stereo sysem must in place too. I need music to fill the room when I work. I don't like working in dead silence.

So yeah, that's my dream study!

Singapore Boy

As I read monomania's post on the inflight service on board an SAF aircraft (she was served food by men in uniform! Real combat army uniform!) which brought her to Banda Aceh for a story she had to do, an idea sprang into my mind.

Someone should start an airline which will only have cute hunky men for air stewards. Hell, Singapore Airlines should just start another subsidiary. I can't think of a good name for the airline at the moment, but the crew will be the male counterpart of the now world-renowned Singapore Girl. We'll have our Singapore Boy.

And if I were the Marketing Head of this new airline which I'm proposing, I would pitch this airline to the gay men (the pink dollar's a lucrative market), rich bored tai-tais with philandering husbands and the single women (a growing market).

Recruitment of Singapore Boys would be just as stringent as it is for the Singapore Girl. Potential candidates will be made to parade in skimpy trunks, made to jump out of a fake plane and swim a few laps across the pool, show their hands for inspection to make sure there are no ugly calluses, make a speech about themselves in front of a whole room of people (eloquence is always good, but without which a cute face would suffice too) etc. The panel of judges will of course be made up of me, a few girlfriends and some of our very good gay friends.

Oh, this idea is sounding fun already! The Singapore Airlines management might be too straight-laced to buy this idea. I could pitch it to Richard Branson the crazy Brit knight who loves bizarre ideas. But wait, Singapore Airlines owns 49% of Virgin Atlantic Airways. Darn. But I guess it's still ok, Branson's 51% stake still triumphs. I could still get my Singapore Boy.

A Woman's Best Accessory

What's a woman's best accessory? A Tiffany diamond ring? A limited edition Hermes bag? A pair of Manolo Blahniks or Jimmy Choos? A vintage Valentino gown? A Vera Wang wedding gown? Or a handsome man on the arm?

None of the above, my friend, according to an article I read in an issue of Her World.

Let me digress a little here. I don't buy women's magazines and the only time I read them is when I'm at the hairdresser's. Every time I'm there I learn something new. In fact, it was a couple of months back that I finally learned that the 'swinging' isn't quite the innocent term that was previously associated with playgrounds or the dance fad of the 1930s. And I only recently learnt of the term 'Lipstick Lesbian' while flipping through a friend's gay magazine. I know, I'm embarrassingly low on the hip quotient. I'm going to assume that everyone is higher on the hip quotient so I shan't bother defining the two terms.

Anyway back to the main topic. The article I read said that the best accessory for a woman is a scruffy and unkempt-looking man 'cos his scruffiness will only serve to play up her beauty and elegance. Errm, while the theory is logical, I really don't like to go out with scruffy-looking guys.

The article cited examples of local celeb couples, e.g. Jamie Yeo and Glenn Ong. But I say, pls lah, Glenn Ong is able to carry it off 'cos he's got attitude and that's the kind of public persona he projects. Not every guy can carry such a look off ok?

I think if a guy doesn't make the effort to spruce up, look clean-shaven and put on some appropriate clothes befitting the occasion, it really shows a lack of bearing. Some women interviewed in the article disagree with me though. They say they don't mind unkempt guys as if a guy is too concerned about his appearance, it is very annoying and they would even get suspicious of his sexual bias!

While I agree that men who are too vain are just a major turn-off, I still don't quite agree on the theory that an unkempt-looking man is a woman's best accessory. I like men clean-shaven and nicely dressed thank you very much.

I Don't Love You But I'll Still Marry You

I was having dinner at a Han�s outlet two nights ago and sitting next to me was a couple in their early 30s waiting for their food to be served. But instead of talking to each other, both of them were busy playing around with their mobile phones. The guy was toying with the camera in his phone while the lady was playing a game. This went on for quite long and there I�m thinking, what�s the point of being out with each other at all when all you�re interested in is your phone??? I can�t fathom it.

What�s even more bizarre is this new innovation by a Hong Kong firm. Guys can now have a virtual girlfriend named Vivienne. Apparently, she likes to be taken to movies, given virtual flowers and you can even marry her in a virtual ceremony! Plans are in the pipeline to have a virtual boyfriend, a gay boyfriend and a lesbian girlfriend. Like I�m sorry, if you really need this, you REALLY need to see a doctor. But manufacturers say this is not meant to replace a real-life companion. Like DUH!

Speaking of couples, it was reported in a survey that Singaporean couples may not be happy with their partners but they will still marry them anyway. People are just getting married for the sake of marrying and cowering to societal pressure. It�s like there are some things one has to do by a certain age and if you don�t do it, you�re some loser. Getting married just for the sake of doing so is just insane. Just goes to show there are a lot of mad people out there.

You're a pain, but let's get married anyway

SINGAPORE, March 4 (Reuters) - Singaporean couples may not be happy with their partners but they will still marry them anyway, a global survey on relationships shows.

The poll of 716 couples who planned to wed showed that 39 percent
were unhappy in their relationships, the highest proportion of nine
societies surveyed by a U.S.-based marriage and family therapy organisation.

The poll is the latest unflattering survey of ardour in a wealthy population that chases what is known in local parlance as the Five C's: career, condominium, club, credit cards and cars.

Birth rates hit a record low in 2004 and an annual survey by condom-maker Durex has ranked Singapore for three straight years near the bottom of its list of sexually active nations.

In the latest survey, only 14 percent of Singaporeans described themselves as "very happy" with their partners, the lowest of the regions surveyed and compared with 48 percent in the United States.

The polls were conducted as part of a U.S.-based programme known as
PREPARE (Premarital Personal and Relationship Evaluation) led by David
Olson, a retired University of Minnesota professor and author of several
books on family therapy.

Other regions surveyed were Japan, Hong Kong, Australia, Britain,
Canada, Germany and New Zealand. But Singapore's results stood out
sharply, said Olson.

"I'm surprised so many premarital Singaporean couples are not as
happy with their relationships but are still planning to get married," Olson
told Reuters after releasing the findings at a conference in Singapore.

Among those in the survey who consider themselves unhappy, most cited
disagreements with their partners on a number of issues, or said they
disliked their partners' personality or that there were problems communicating effectively.

In contrast, U.S. couples ready to tie the knot painted a far more
blissful picture with nearly half of 1,000 surveyed indicating they
were very happy in their relationships.

Olson said couples in Singapore -- an island of 4.2 million people --
may be suffering because of a reluctance to speak their minds about
problems to avoid confrontation.

"They are afraid to say what they think and are afraid to disagree,"
he said.

Reminders

Anybody knows what's the deal with the term "a gentle reminder"? Seriously, where's the "gentle" in the reminder? Somebody show me 'cos I don't see it. It's one of those oft-used terms in work correspondence which leaves me baffled sometimes. Same goes for "subtle reminder". Like what's so subtle about this reminder?

As you can see, I'm in one of my moods. PMT. Stay outta my way!

Wallflower

I was going to post a blog entry about small talk when an aptly timed column appears in today's issue of Life! on the same subject matter.

The columnist today writes about how difficult she finds making small talk and how she's constantly amazed at how some people seem to excel in it. I find myself facing the same situation every time I'm with a huge group of people at a party or some other social function.

I marvel at how some of my friends can work the room so easily. I observe them and others and am impressed by the way they talk to each other as if they have known each other for the longest time. I so cannot do it. I'm like some wallflower in all these social functions. I just like to stick with a familiar group of people and not bother with anything else. Which of course doesn't do much for my networking skills to say the least.

But really, being in these big social functions and parties scare the hell outta me. I think I'm just socially inept. While I don't think I'm the pits when it comes to making small talk, I'm not the kinda person who's the life of the party either. I think I usually do better in small group situations. I'm not unfriendly. It's just that those social events where small talk prevails intimidate me.

Ah well, at least I know I'm not alone!

The Taxman Calling

Got an email from the HR manager last Friday instructing the staff about some stuff to do with the filing of income tax forms. So I finally earn enough to be required to submit income tax forms to the IRAS. Yipee! I mean, I seriously see this as a good thing. It's good to be able to earn my own keep and spend money without feeling too guilty about occasional indulgences.

I have no clue whatsoever when it comes to filing taxes since this is the first time I'm doing it. So if anyone has any tips as to how I can minimise the amount I have to pay, please let me know!!!

Aimless

I was asked by my boss (during the appraisal lunch) and someone else I was talking to the other day where I saw myself in the long-term. I dread such questions 'cos I have no answers.

After relating the incidents to my mum, she also said to me that I should fix some goals for myself in the long-term. Like you know, think of something that I want to achieve in five/ten or whatever years� time. I thought about it but my mind was a blank canvas. Nothing came to mind. Then I thought, maybe I should just put �Getting married and have a kid within the next five years� as a goal since everybody is doing it. But no, I don�t think so. Not that I�ve written off those two things altogether, but I�ve never really thought about them as being some life ambition. If it happens, it happens.

So what IS my life ambition(s)? I don�t know. Suddenly I feel aimless. It�s another one of those quarter-life crisis moments. Hell, I can�t even call it a quarter-life crisis now �cos I�m already on the wrong side of 25! Argh.

But yeah, maybe I should start giving more thought to the future.

Thing is, I�m not the super-ambitious sort of gal. Like I don�t have a burning desire to climb the corporate ladder and be at the top of the corporate food chain. I don�t aspire to own a car here in Singapore �cos I don�t see the need for it. I don�t aspire to own my own flat either. Not unless I get married that is. I don�t need to own club memberships or lots of branded goods. Though of course lots of shoes and clothes would be nice. heh.

I think I see my job more as a means to an end. Just take the money at the end of the day and do things like travelling, eating, and watch movies. But still, seems like quite an aimless existence compared to some other extremely driven people who are either doing good for the world or doing super well in their careers.

My dream job is to be a travel writer. But why am I not pursuing my dream? I don�t know. I think many of us young working Singaporeans have a dream job but we somehow just shelf it aside and treat it as we call it�a dream. Something which by definition, will never exist and happen for us. It�s so fatalistic! I hate myself too for not being brave enough to pursue things that I dream of. Why is it that my dream has to be one that doesn�t involve a job that will give me big bucks then I can go travelling all the time? Wouldn�t it be wonderful if what I really loved was something like banking and finance?

Of course, I�m probably seeing things in terms that are much too black and white. People with high-paying jobs pay a price too in terms of level of responsibility, stress, risk and time involved.

If I could be a hermit somewhere in the mountains, maybe that would be good. But nah, I�m ultimately a city gal. The countryside is wonderful for a respite but when it comes down to it, I enjoy the things cities have to offer. I like the vibrancy that runs through cities, the lights, entertainment and culture.

Anyway, I've lost my train of thought. Sorry for the silly meanderings. See, even this post has no aim!

Just one of those moments

You know you're having an unglam moment when you're dashing across the road halfway and then the green man appears...

Airborne

Your Element Is Air

You dislike conflict, and you've been able to rise above the angst of the world. And when things don't go your way, you know they'll blow over quickly. Easygoing, you tend to find joy from the simple things in life. You roll with the punches, and as a result, your life is light and cheerful. You find it easy to adapt to most situations, and you're an open person. With you, what you see is what you get... and people love that!

In the Right Line?

Your Dominant Intelligence is Linguistic Intelligence

You are excellent with words and language. You explain yourself well. An elegant speaker, you can converse well with anyone on the fly. You are also good at remembering information and convincing someone of your point of view. A master of creative phrasing and unique words, you enjoy expanding your vocabulary. You would make a fantastic poet, journalist, writer, teacher, lawyer, politician, or translator.

The Foreigner

The tricksters are very good at telling apart who the foreigners are. I was walking along Wangfujing Street (王府井) which is the shopping belt of Beijing when a girl in her 20s approaches me and asks me in Chinese if I'm a local. I said no, and she continues to tell me some sob story about how she and her friend have just come from Harbin and have run into some problems. And she wonders if I could give her 10 yuan so that they can buy some food.

Having been warned of such tricksters before, I said sorry, no, but she continues and says that she's only approaching me 'cos we're all fellow girls alone in a foreign place blah blah blah. I brushed her off several times and walk hurriedly into a department store before she gave up.

Geez. I must really look like this lost little lamb, and so I have all these predators preying on me. I mean, I look Chinese (well I AM Chinese) but yet they can tell me apart from the natives. Must be the wide-eyed tourist look.

Look Who's Watching

I was watching BBC in my hotel room on Sunday night when the TV went black and lost its sound when the newscaster went something like "Xinhuanet has reported that Zhao Ziyang, former Communist party leader..."

Thirty seconds later, the TV came back on again with the newscaster reporting something on the Philippines.

Right. I figured the foreign news channels must be monitored 24/7 for someone to hit the button and stop transmission any time anything of a politically sensitive nature goes on air.

"Chope!"

Remember how "chope!" used to be our favourite word when we used to play with our friends as kids? Btw, for the non-Singaporeans, "chope" is some word which someone coined to mean "to reserve something for myself" or when playing catching as kids, we used to say "chope!" just before the catcher caught us. Saying "chope!" is akin to having some protective shield. The catcher is not allowed to catch you, but you'll have to stand at that very spot and wait till some free person comes round and taps you before you're allowed to run again. The poor catcher then has to go chase some other person. It was a bloody exhausting game, but at that age, we had the energy and stamina for it...unlike now!

As an adult, I see instances of "chope!" every work-day when I go to lunch. I've no idea who came up with the system of "chope-ing" seats at hawker centres and food courts by placing packets of tissue on the seat or on the table. It's bizarre. Most times I comply with the rule, but one day I feel like acting dumb and feigning ignorance. I swear I'll be labelled a bitch after that. heh. It's like some unspoken rule. I don't think it's fair actually. If you want that seat, I think you should get someone to reserve the place for you.

Something else which irks me about Singaporeans is that they take chairs from other tables just to put their bags. I think this is perfectly fine when there aren't any others looking for seats to sit on, but not otherwise. A month or two ago, I went to this small neighbourhood Hakka eatery with my family. The place was packed, but we managed to get a table. However, there weren't the normal chairs (ones with backing) available because people at other tables had taken two out of the four chairs at our table to put their bags. The waitress wanted us to sit on stools instead.

My sister and I refused, and told the waitress that she should take those chairs back for us and give those stools to them to put their bags. And she goes "No lah, bu hao yi si (it's not nice to do it) ". We were prepared to ask the people ourselves, or even walk out, if she didn't finally decide to take those chairs back for us.

Well, call my sis and I difficult or whatever, but I think we DO deserve to sit on more comfortable chairs since we're paying to sit inside and enjoy the food. I refuse to be deprived of my comfort for some inanimate objects like bags!

Canine Reactions

When I walk my dog, I can tell whether or not the person(s) coming in the opposite direction is a dog-lover. There are usually two reactions when I walk Rex, my collie. He's the more handsome and unique-looking one, so he tends to garner more attention.

When I walk Rex, I get a lot of "Lassssiiiieeeee!!!!" screams coming my way. The dog-lovers light up when they see him, their eyes turning into a smile, and they are likely to walk over to pet him and exchange a word or two with me.

The petrified ones, usually women who are just hopeless damsels, cling on to their boyfriends/husbands for dear life, as if the dog would eat them for its next meal. Speaking of which, I know this is rather sexist of me here, but I think it's really un-macho for a grown man to be scared of dogs, especially those small lap dogs like malteses, chihuahuas, poodles etc. If a guy so much as clings on to me when a dog walks past, he would be dropping several rungs down the pedestal in my eyes that's for sure! Squealing women are bad. Squealing men? Horrific.

Another thing which I really think is wrong is when parents or whoever the caretaker is, tells their child/children that dogs are going to bite and they should never go near them. True, it's good to be more cautious 'cos you never know what a dog's temperament is like, and I certainly wouldn't go touching a wild/stray dog. But if the dog is on a leash and with its owner, just ask the owner first before you attempt to touch the dog just in case the dog is adverse to strangers. But overprotective parents tend to instill fear into a child even before the child has come to know it. That's the sad part, and I've come across this many times.

Anyway, I think I should walk my dogs more often. No one's bringing them for walks these days. Poor dogs. It's as they're under house arrest. Ok, new year resolution? Walk my dogs every day (unless it's raining).

The Little Girls' Room

*On the phone with a good friend yesterday*

Me: Ok! I need to go NOW! Talk to you in a bit!

Although I could easily have brought the phone into the toilet with me, I just don't feel comfortable in doing so even though, technically, the person on the other end of the line can't see what you're doing. But it's just weird to be talking to someone on the phone in the toilet, don't you think?

On another note, girls' bladders always seem to synchronize. We like to go to the toilet in pairs/groups. It's like one of those laws in the universe. Guys never understand why girls like to go to the toilet together. Maybe it's a sisterhood thing. We like to have someone to talk to when we stroll to the toilet. And if you somehow don't like some of the people you're with, you can bitch about these undesirable beings with your trusted companion. Heh.

Anyway, there's some silly musings for you on a wet Monday morning on the first work day of 2005.

Adieu 2004!

al arrowed monoceros and she in turn arrowed me to do this. So here goes:

Three names you go by: j_ _ _, may, shangmei

Three screennames you have: dimsumdolly, dsd, fluffy clouds

Three things you like about yourself: that I am adventurous, loyal to my friends, independent

Three things you dislike about yourself: lack of confidence, lack of determination, my impatience

Three parts of your heritage: Chinese, Chinese, Chinese (to be more specific, Cantonese)

Three things that scare you: Being unhealthy in old age, the dark, reptiles

Three of your everyday essentials: food & beverage (But of course! Can I treat both as one entity?), lipbalm, sleep

Three things you are wearing right now: black fleece jacket which I use in the office, a necklace I bought at Paddington market in Sydney, MAC liquid foundation

Three of your favorite bands/artists (at the moment): Joss Stone, Maroon 5, Jamie Callum

Three things you want to try in the next 12 months: go-karting, eating some cuisine I've never tried before, try to get myself to Japan to see the sakuras in bloom!

Three things you want in a relationship (love is a given): to enjoy activities together like dining, walks, sports; emotional intimacy; companionable silence.

Two truths and a lie (random order): I've eaten pig's brain, I've backpacked alone to Europe, I've never gotten pissed drunk.

Three physical things about the opposite (or same) sex that appeals to you: broad shoulders and strong arms (I don't care, that's one!), a tall frame, eyes that dance

Three things you just can't do: go on a diet, dance, act

Three of your favorite hobbies: read, travel, writing for fun

Three things you want to do really badly right now: finish editing the manuscripts piled high on my work desk, sleep (especially in this rainy weather!), have lunch

Three careers you're considering: be a book purchaser for the National Library, a food critic, a lifestyle & travel writer

Three places you want to go on vacation: Egypt, the Silk Road, Japan

Three kids' names: Sydney, Skye, Skylar

Three things you want to do before you die: Live in Europe for at least a year and write about it, see snow fall, do a round-the-world trip

Three people who have to take this quiz, or not: overacuppa, monomania, Dawn

Anyhow, this blog entry seems like quite a good way to round off the year. All in all, it's been a good year. The first half of the year was difficult and very trying. I struggled with a bout of depression but eventually got over it with the help of family and friends. Thank you, I love you all!!!!

Second half of the year, things were brighter what with a new job, new experiences and some travel thrown in.

Travel-wise, I had a pretty good year. Managed to make a short trip back to Sydney, got to go to Beijing (albeit it was a business trip) and made a quick getaway to Hong Kong.

I also tried new stuff like wakeboarding which is really good fun. Took up tennis lessons, which is something I've always wanted to do. Made new friends through this blog. Though I haven't met most of them and they remain virtual, I consider them friends nonetheless.

Other personal achievements also include writing a few articles for two magazines (relatively unknown ones really) and getting published. It was a kick getting to see my own byline!

In any case, the year has ended on a positive note career-wise. I got converted the day before yesterday to be a permanent employee (I had signed on as a contract staff) and got a small pay increment as well! Woohoo!

Well, am looking forward to 2005! And here's wishing everyone out there a Happy New Year!

The Right Fit

I hate fitting rooms with no mirrors in them. It's like I'm forced to come out and parade in the clothes I'm trying on whether or not I look good in them. It is definitely a conspiracy on the part of the boutique owners so that the sales assistants can sweettalk you into believing that you look good in the clothes and then you foolishly believe and part with your money. I was in a boutique yesterday which didn't have any mirrors in the cubicles. It was also a wee bit too small. Didn't like it at all.

I mean, I really don't want to parade around and show everyone how ugly I look if I look really bad in the clothes! Also, isn't it troublesome to have to keep opening and closing the door, and stepping in and out of it if I'm trying on more than one piece of clothing? Duh.

Many fitting rooms are also fitted with slimming mirrors. Another conspiracy! They make you look better than you actually do!

Anyway, my favourite fitting rooms around town at the moment are the ones in the women's lingerie section at CK Tang. Ladies in Singapore, if you haven't already checked it out, please do so!!! You'll feel like a princess I tell you! Even if you're not interested in buying anything, just pick anything off the racks and pretend you want to try something just for the sake of entering the fitting rooms there.

There are about four/five (can't remember) fitting rooms there, each with its own unique design. They are all designed to resemble an Italian/French boudoir, with all the frills and pomp of lace, curtains and girly chairs. It's huge for one thing, probably three times the size of the average fitting room. It's a room meant to tickle the senses, up the lust and sexual quotient and rouse those hormones. It's lovely!!!

Anyway, back to the main topic. The best fitting rooms are those which:

a) Are big--I hate having to squeeze into tiny cubicles. It's like I don't have enough space to even put my arms and legs! Best if it's also big enough to hold another person. Girls being girls, we like someone else to have a look at how we look in the new piece of clothing, reassure us that we do look good in it (even though we already know we do!) before we buy it. So having more space for that someone (whoever he/she is) to pop in to have a look is good!

b) Have enough hooks for us to hang lots of clothes and our other bags of stuff. You know how it is with your tote bag and all the other shopping bags!

c) Don't require me to bring some stupid number tag indicating the number of pieces of clothing I've brought in to try. What's worse is when I have nowhere to hang or put this number tag! Mango is one good example. I don't know who came up with such a silly idea! I mean seriously, they don't even bother checking if the number of pieces you've returned after you've tried them tallies with the number tag.

d) Have sales assistant helping to remove hangers that may be lingering in the fitting room as previous customers have forgotten to remove them. Don't you just hate it when you have tons of empty hangers in the fitting room before you've even tried anything???

e) Have mirrors in them. And I'm talking big full-length mirrors here.

f) Has a proper door that latches and closes properly. I don't like curtained ones 'cos there is this danger of someone mistaking that the room's empty and whipping the curtains aside in an a la "Open Sesame" mode while you're in a semi-undressed state. The worst is when you have little kids running around looking for their Mummy and they think it's only right for them to draw aside every curtain in every cubicle to check if their Mummy's there.

g) Have a chair for me to dump my bag(s). Yes, my bag(s) needs a proper resting place too!

h) Are nicely decorated.

i) Have sales assistant on standby ready to take any requests for taking the same piece of clothing in another colour or size.

j) Have high-heel shoes at the corner just to give me a feel of how that dress/pants/skirt would look in heels. Best is to just have a range of shoes on standby!

So yes, that's what my dream fitting room should be!

Elitism

While listening to the radio on the way to work this morning, the topic of the morning was whether elitism exists in Singapore. When I heard that, I just went "DUH???!!!??". Please, elitism exists in every society, it's just a matter of degree and ways in which it manifests itself.

The discussion was sparked off by a letter that appeared in the forum pages of the TODAY newspaper today. It's titled "A spectre of elitism".

Would write more on this, but then work beckons.

Bruises

Anybody has any advice for getting rid of bruises? I actually haven't done a single thing to the ones I have and they seem to be spreading out, turning a bit yellowish and greyish in the process. I look like a leopard. Help.

Rainy Mornings

This morning is one of those mornings where all you want to do is curl up in bed and sleep the morning away. There's a light rain going on outside and the temperatures are cool. It was hard dragging myself out of bed. I say Singapore employment laws should state that rainy mornings should be declared halfdays! People should be allowed to sleep in and enjoy the cool weather and catch up on their sleep whenever such weather prevails. There should be an official decree I tell you. That will happen--in DSD's very own utopia and lala-land.

Bus Screens

This is what I look out to almost every time I take the public bus. I hate it. I feel like an insect which has compound eyes, thereby leading to mosaic vision. It's annoying (to me) that bus windows are almost always plastered with some kind of advertisement which is really what this film of plastic causing my fragmented vision is.

I feel like my right to a clear view of the outside world has been robbed. I like looking out of the window and watch the world go by as the bus weaves its way through the traffic.

But what's a mere paying commuter's satisfaction compared to the dollars rolling in from these ads?

Overheard

A snippet of conversation I overheard while on the escalator the other day. This mother had her young daughter and son beside her. I put the kids at about 4-5 years of age.

The little girl is chattering away like a motor mouth, and then the mum says to her, "If you have nothing to talk, you don't have to talk."

Upon reaching the top of the escalator and getting off it, the little girl chirps, "Thank you escalator!!!!"

It cracked me up. :)

Naive & Stupid

Tha't's me.

Escape from the Tower

I was listening to Class 95 (for the non-Singaporean readers, this is one of the more popular radio stations in Singapore) on the way to work this morning, and the three morning DJs were talking about public transport in Singapore.

What happened was that the FD (Flying Dutchman--yeah, that's his moniker. Quite silly I think) has been taking the public transport for the past couple of days because he has sent his car for servicing. So for the first time in donkey years, he is taking the bus, MRT, and taxi.

And surprise surprise, he SUDDENLY realises how easy it is to get around Singapore!

FD: "I discovered that people no longer use cash to pay for their fares! They swipe this EZ-link card..."

FD: "And you can use this card for the trains and buses! AND when taking the MRT, you just tap it too and don't have to slot it into the machine and take the ticket again. Just tap and the turnstile will open!"

And then they carry on about how this system is so good 'cos it calculates the fare such that people are prevented from cheating. Yahdahyahdahyahdah.

I was incredulous to hear them ooohhing and aaahhhing about the EZ-link card system. Like hello??? Where have you been in the last three years? Mars? More likely in their ivory towers in Mars.

It's like the discovery of the year for them. And if they were some scientists, we would have to award the Nobel Prize to them. I don't have anything against them not having taken public transport in donkey years since these DJs can all afford the luxury of owning their own cars. But come on, that doesn't mean you should be ignorant of what's going on. I mean, all these developments are reported in the newspapers, and these DJs say they read the papers and scour it for topics to talk about on their shows.

I thought the talk today was just ridiculous. All that oohhhing and aaahhing. Like good for you, you've stepped out of your ivory tower! Welcome to the real world! But oh, I forgot, you're only paying a visit! I hope you enjoy your stay!

Food Pairings

My spirits are high this morning. Not that there's anything special about the day. I just felt happy when I saw that the skies were blue with nice fluffly clouds above as I made my way to work. Fine weather for the morning. It's just a pity I don't have a window to look out to in my basement office. Basement offices are the worst! Anyway, I also just had a cranberry scone for breakfast. I love cranberry scones. Yums! So that little snack also added to my good spirits.

Speaking of food, here's a Chinese song which I find absolutely delightful because of its lyrics.

喝純白的豆漿 是純白的浪漫 望著你
可愛臉蛋 和你純真的模樣
我傻傻對你笑 是你憂愁解藥 你說我
就像油條 很簡單卻很美好
我知道 你和我就像是豆漿油條 要一起
吃下去 味道才會是最好 你需要我的傻笑
我需要你的擁抱 愛情就是要這樣它才不會淡掉
我知道 有時候 也需要吵吵鬧鬧 但始終
也知道 只有你對我最好 豆漿離不開油條
讓我愛你愛到老 愛情就是要這樣它才幸福美好
我知道 都知道 你知道 你都知道 好不好
別偷笑 笑 讓我知道(就好)
我喝完熱豆漿 卻念著還想要 你吃完金黃
油條 愛情又要再發酵

These are the lyrics from young Singaporean singer Lin Junjie�s song called <<豆漿油條>>. I think the lyrics are so cute. But I shan't attempt to translate into English 'cos it sounds very stupid and cheesy when I do so. Trust me, I did attempt to do so, but gave up halfway due to lack of time and also 'cos it sounded terrible when translated into English.

I'm just tickled by the lyrics 'cos it's a love song that alludes to 豆漿油條 (soy bean milk and fried doughsticks) as being inseparable from each other because they taste best when eaten together.

Incidentally, there is a story behind how 油條 came about. It is said that the two pieces of dough are supposed to symbolise two traitors, Qin Hui and wife, who betrayed Yue Fei, the national hero of the Southern Song Dynasty. To show their hatred for the traitors, the people twisted the two pieces of dough together and dipped it into hot oil and took bites of it to symbolise some form of punishment and torture being meted out to Qin Hui and wife.

Anyway, that set me thinking about other food pairings. So far, I can only think of these three:

1) Apple pie and old-fashioned vanilla ice cream
2) Dark chocolate and strawberry
3) Scones and butter (no, NOT margarine! Don't like margarine anyway.)

Can't think of anymore for now. Feel free to add to the list.

Pushing the Right Buttons

Know what button I like best? The snooze button! I use the alarm feature on my handphone. My usual pratice on a weekday morning is that I press the snooze button every time the alarm goes off at 6:25. I wake up, walk in a zombie-like state to the bathroom to switch the water heater on and then plonk myself back in bed until the alarm goes off again 10 minutes later. Then I drag myself out of bed, head to the shower for a splash of water to fully wake myself up to the day.

The snooze button gives you this false sense of security. Like oh, it's ok, I can sleep for a bit more and I still won't be late. But the tendency is to press it all too many times! I must say that I'm pretty good with this one--I'll usually get up after the alarm rings a second time.

I like frog buttons on clothes. And oh, button mushrooms too!

My other favorite button--the belly button of a guy's washboard abs. ;p

Now, if only there were a guy who could push the right buttons...

Native Speaker

I don't like the term "native speaker". After sending my Korean colleague the preface which I had edited yesterday for his client's approval, I got an email from him asking if it was reviewed by a native speaker like X (my boss) or someone else?

Perhaps by virtue of the fact that I have a Chinese surname, he assumed that I was no "native speaker" of the language. Ok, call it oversensitivity or whatever you want, but I felt somewhat insulted and the question stung. It was, to me, a question of my competence.

People should start changing their idea of a native speaker of English being only that of a white person. These days, English is so widely used that Caucasians can no longer be considered the only native speakers around. What is a native speaker anyway? The most common view people would take is that the person is most proficient and comfortable when speaking, reading, listening, and writing in that language. Going by such a definition, I know plenty of people who are non-Caucasians and are equally proficient, if not more, in the language than the average Caucasian. Yet, many people still don't see this group of people as native speakers of English. And I would have to say that many of those people who are gulity of thinking that way are the Asians!

I think many foreign-born Chinese, just like many Singaporeans, are caught in the same paradox. For Singaporeans, terming Chinese/Malay/Tamil as one's mother tongue (which ever language one studies depending on one's race) is a misnomer. The government's definition of a mother tongue is the language which is usually spoken by one's race and/or cultural group. To me however, your mother tongue is supposed to be a language in which you are most comfortable with, and one in which you've grown up speaking.

However, for many Singaporeans, myself included, we've been speaking English all our lives. I think, read, and speak in English. Chinese (PuTongHua) was a language that was labelled as my mother tongue by my dear government. If I really had to label a language as my mother tongue going by the government's definition of it, it would have to be Cantonese and not Chinese since it's the language that my paternal and maternal grandparents spoke. Chinese is, after all, really only the dialect of Beijing. But it was made the official language because Beijing is the capital of China.

But this is not to say that I do not like the Chinese language and culture. On the contrary, it's something I want to get myself more acquainted with. It's just that I haven't had many opportunities to do so. I speak English at home most of the time, save for a few smattering Cantonese sentences and phrases. All the schools I went to were primarily English-speaking. My friends and I converse in English. At work, I use only English. So there hardly is any opportunity for me to make use of Chinese.

Anyhow, my main point is that people should change their mindset towards the term "native speaker" whether it pertains to English or any other language. With the world getting smaller and with people moving from one place to another all the time, the strict and past definitions (based primarily on race and country of birth) of who is and who isn't a native speaker of a language should no longer apply.

Touch-Me-Not

I don't know about you, but I always have the compulsion to brush my feet against the mimosa plant every time I walk past any that I see. The mimosa plant is the leaf with many small leaflets in the pic* above. I just love to see the leaves close up (see pic below). Cheap thrill, I know, but it's something I've loved to do since I was a kid.

I think it's commonly known as the touch-me-not plant (don't quote me on this, please) because once you so much as brush against the leaves, it shrivels and closes up like a clam. Very cute.

Its flowers are like little fluff balls that are usually pink in colour. Apparently there are purple ones too but I've yet to see these ones before. Anyway, making mimosa leaves close is my warped little idea of fun as I walk along paths.

Speaking of walking, have I ever mentioned how I HATE those squeaky shoes that some parents love to buy for their toddlers to trot around in? Oh gosh, those shoes are sssooooo annoying and irritating! They should be banned in public places 'cos it's a public nuisance and a source of noise pollution. The kid's just running around and with every step an annoying SQUEAK is heard. I say a fine should be imposed on the use of such shoes in public.

Anyway, the weekend beckons.

*Disclaimer: The two pictures are NOT meant to contain any artistic merit and/or aesthetically pleasing value whatsoever.

Agonising Decision

Deciding what to wear for work each day is a real pain. It's such a time-consuming and agonising decision that it 's something best done the night before rather than the morning itself when you're simply too pressed for time.

And the condition which afflicts most women is that our wardrobes can be bursting at the seams, but yet we'll say we have nothing to wear. By that, we mean we have nothing NEW to wear. Note the hidden, unverbalised word. But I must state that I don't really have many clothes. Serious! Compared to my friends, the number of clothes I have pales in comparison.

Sometimes I would rather I worked in a company which requires me to wear a uniform. That way, it saves me from making that decision every night. I mean, these decisions don't just stop at the clothes. It extends to the shoes, bag, and accessories too!

Right. That's my bimbotic rant of the day.

On another note, I had a lovely dinner at a friend's place last night. Two other friends from uni and I were invited to our friend's place for dinner because it's part of the Hari Raya festivities for her. It's become a tradition of sorts. Every year, we'll go to her place during Hari Raya to eat.

The food was delicious, especially my favourtie dish--sambal goreng. Her mum makes the best sambal goreng! I ate it with relish and my friend even made extra for me to "da pao" home! Haha!

But best of all was the conversation and all the catching up we did. Nothing quite beats a good conversation amongst good friends.

Book Coup

Half the fun about going to the library is walking along the shelves and browsing at the books in the hope of coming across a book that you've always wanted to read. Better still if it's a new book and you are the first to get your hands on it! Ah, when it's pristine new it's so lovely to run your fingers along the pages and the faint smell of new paper waffing up one's nostrils is simply intoxicating.

Anyway, I went on my weekly pilgrimage to the library and I scored a coup (at least I thought it was. haha!) yesterday. I managed to find two David Sedaris books--Me Talk Pretty One Day and Holidays On Ice. I also found a book which I had wanted to read from a long time back but had forgotten all about it until I saw it on the shelf yesterday. It's Ernest Hemingway's A Moveable Feast.

So I stepped out of the library a very happy gal. :)

Lost List

Damn, I've lost the list in which I had noted down a whole list of books which I wanted to make reservations for at the library through the online reservation system.

Note to self: Never scribble notes on pieces of paper and leave them lying around. They almost always disappear for some reason or another.

Argh...now I have to compile my list again. Worst thing is that I can't seem to recall the books!

But have I ever mentioned how I love the online reservation system? I may have done so, but heck, I'm just going to do so again. Instead of waiting for books I want to miraculously appear on the shelves (they usually don't), I now usually do a search for it online through the National Library's OPAC system and make a reservation for it. Most of the time I can find the book I want.

What's also good is that I can choose which library branch I want to pick the book up at. I usually pick the library nearest my home. Anyway, I only need to pay a nominal sum of $1.55 for this service. It's all good for me 'cos this way I don't have to spend vast amounts of money buying books to satisfy my thirst for them, and it doesn't clog up my shelves at home, which are already overflowing! Unless I fall head over heels in love with a book and it's an absolutely must-have, I'm not inclined to buy it. Hence I'd rather borrow it first, have a read to see how it is, and will then decide whether to have it in my collection.

I know it might be a little weird to buy books only after I've read them, but that's the way it works for me. I like the knowledge of having a good book on my shelf so that I can pick it up anytime I want.

Yes yes, I'm terribly neurotic when it comes to books! Some of my good friends are like that too. I guess that's why we're good friends. You know who you are. :)

A Dog's Psyche

If my dogs could talk, I would want them to tell me how they choose their poop- and pee-stop. Whenever I take them for walks, they'll sniff at various spots along the way and if they decide, for some reason unknown to me, that this is the spot they want, they either lift their legs or take a squatting stance depending on whether it's big or small business. The small always comes first and for some reason it's never done at the same spot as the big.

Oh, have I also mentioned that my collie, Rex, is a very shy dog? If he sees people walking past or cars zooming past, he doesn't want to do his business. And he likes to run into bushes to it. Haha. So if you see me standing in a bush, it's my dog who's up to something. NOT me.

Let me try to adopt a dog's psyche--So I sniff and sniff at the grass looking for a good spot , but I smell another dog's pee/scent here. Hmmm...I'm not taking THIS spot anymore. That's just gross. I'm going for another pasture.

Do you think that's how dogs think??? I need Dr. DoLittle's help!

Ah, this reminds me of a book which is a favourite of mine. It's Peter Mayle's A Dog's Life which is written in the first person (or should I say canine) perspective of a dog. It's a hilarious book and had me in stitches when I read it.

My Friendly Bank

Automation seems to have reached a new high (at least to me) when I went to withdraw money from the ATM just now. Usually while waiting for the money to come out, I get the message: (MY FULL NAME), Remember to change your PIN every few months and don't let anyone know it. / Make use of our Internet Banking services / or some other message or tip the bank seeks to dispense to its customers.

Anyway, today's message was: (MY FULL NAME), wishing you happiness on your birthday and always!

I had to do a double take there. Oooooh, I'm ssssoooooooo happy that my bank remembers my birthday! *claps and prances around the room in glee*

Why don't they go a step further and top up my bank account instead??? Now THAT I would be most happy and grateful for.

Instant Cup Noodles

The biggest irony in my family is that I'm the one who loves eating the most but I'm the worst cook. I'm usually too lazy to cook and I can only manage simple fare palatable only to myself. It must be said that I drop my standards drastically when it comes to me cooking for me. I wished I had the culinary skills of Nigella Lawson, but alas I'm no domestic goddess.

Oh, I think that it's nice to eat instant cup noodles once in a while. There was no dinner at home last night when I got home and earlier in the day I had this craving for instant cup noodles. It was also raining and there's just something comforting about sitting in front of the TV slurping noodles as the rain patters outside. So anyway, I had it for dinner last night. Cut a few slices of charsiew and cracked an egg into the bowl and waited for a few minutes before tucking in. In addition, I blanched some broccoli and mixed it with a bit of sesame oil and oyster sauce for some flavour.

A relatively balanced meal I guess! ('Cept for the fact that the noodles are laden with fat!)

The Strongest Suit

A friend sms-ed me yesterday and said that there might be some perks about working in the CBD (Central Business District), and this comes in the manner of eye-candy.

My sms reply: Yeah, all those men in their spiffy suits and shirts make my day when I walk out for lunch! Haha!

It's true--there's nothing quite so attractive on a man than a well-cut and well-fitted suit. A good suit, just like a good dress on a woman, does wonders. The attractiveness quotient goes up quite a few notches.

Am I not right, gals? :p

Roving Eye

I was waiting for a bus with a friend when I spotted a local celeb in the car which happened to be right in front of the bus stop at that point in time. I pointed this out to my friend and she then remarked that I've got rather sharp eyes.

We then got to talking about how many people don't seem to look at their surroundings when they're out and about. For me, I like to look around and just take in my surroundings (be it nice or ugly) whereever I am. I know my friend D says she's not like that. She says she doesn't bother to look around when she walks.

On a bus/train, I often see how dead people look. It's like there's no life in their eyes. I feel like I need to shake them out of their stupor. I like to people watch, and I like to look at the people and things around me. I like to look at the way people dress. And when I see a group of people, I wonder how it is that they are related. Occasionally, I spot cute guys. Haha. Anyways, I just think it's a matter of being aware of one's surroundings.

It might seem a little rude to my dining companion, but when at a restaurant, I like to look at the people who go in and out. I also like to look at the food that comes out of the kitchen and the food on other people's tables. :p

So no offence meant to my dining companion if my eyes sort of wander off for a split second. It's not that you're uninteresting! But no, I'm not so horrible as to look somewhere else ALL the time. It's just a split second thing. 99% of the time I'm very focused!

I guess I have a roving eye of a different sorts. heh.

Gals, try this!

Quite true! (Thanks to al for the link from her blog!)

Social Blogger

You Are a Social Blogger!

Your blog is more of a semi-private affair for your friends. It's how you keep in touch... sharing stories, jokes, and pics.

Indeed! And I can safely say my blog will never become of those intellectual sorts mainly 'cos I'm a pretty shallow person! Or rather, I'm just not smart enough. Serious.

My Billboard Ad

I read with incredulity in yesterday's newspapers about how this Chinese Australian woman in Sydney has bought a billboard ad to try to get herself a husband. The ad is placed at some prominent road intersection in the suburb of Randwick. There was a photo of her standing in front of her billboard ad.

I must say that this woman is very brave to take up such an ad! I sure as hell wouldn't pull off something like that. She describes herself as a "beautiful intelligent Australian Chinese lady" who is seeking to have a "dream family with a fabulous partner to enjoy a lifetime with". Apparently she has a thing for white men as she has specifically asked for someone of Caucasian appearance. Her other criteria include having a good sense of humour, solid financial background with warm and caring nature, and she prefers someone who's a businessman or from a professional background.

I say she should go to the movies--that way she'll find this person she's looking for!

And just for the heck of it, since it's a Friday, and I have a self-given licence to be ditsy and bimbotic, what should I write if I were to put up one for myself?

Intelligent (ahem) Chinese woman seeks to find partner who can accompany her on her eating escapades

Only connoisseurs and food aficionados need reply.

Lady In Red

A friend of mine has some knowledge of palmistry and the group of us were having fun and letting her read our palms last Friday night at Zouk.

According to her, I'm supposed to have many lovers. If that were true, they have all gone into hiding! I'm supposed to be the scarlet woman...many lovers but no husband...no marriage line you see!

Other musings....I discovered that I have stamina that's as robust as a flat tyre. I was like dying and gasping for breath during the one-hour tennis game with my sis last night. Geez...I really have to work on building up my fitness again! To think that I used to be so fit! Argh.

Ravioli from the East

I was surfing this stock photography website for work and I was looking through some food photos. (In case you were wondering, I really HAD to look for Chinese food photos and I wasn't there just for the sake of looking at food. Whether you believe it or not I leave it up to you. Hee.)

I came across this photo of HarGow (prawn dumplings) and some other dumplings, and was promptly amused by the title the photographer had given it--Chinese Ravioli!

Geisha

My jazz singer friend says that whenever she sees me, she's reminded of a geisha. She says that I look like a Japanese and if I really did slap on white powder and draw some cherry lips for myself, I can pass myself off as one.

She isn't the first to say that I look Japanese. When I was in Sydney, the Japanese international students thought I was one of them...that is until I spoke.

Anyway, that's something to think about for Halloween! I'll turn myself into a Geisha from hell and scare the wits out of everyone! ;p

Rainy Mornings

Wet and gloomy mornings like this should prompt an announcement from the government to declare the day a public holiday.

*thinks of my bed*

Second Time Lucky?

So it seems that Princess of Pop Britney Spears has also found the right one for herself. Some dancer. Doing a J-Lo (with respect to Lopez's second husband) heh? She's also become the proud stepmother of a two-year-old. All these after a fiasco marriage to a childhood friend which lasted all but 55 hours earlier in the year. I echo rival Christina Aguilera's words, "Poor girl, she had to buy her own engagement ring."

I give Britney six months.

The Right Person

Read this in the paper's yesterday. (Was an interview with some guy...don't think he's very worth mentioning but I like this line.)

The right person at the wrong time and wrong place is the wrong person.

How true.

Speaking of THE right person, I was at an event last night which celebrated two people who have found the right person for themselves. Simply put--a wedding.

Actually Chinese wedding dinners are hugely boring affairs. Let's just say they aren't my favourite events. Sometimes, there are one or two weddings which are very memorable because of some element. Maybe because the place was done up nicely, or the couple prepared something really different, or the friends and family came up with something to mark the event etc.

But last night's one was very no-frills. I guess it's just too tiring to have to think about so many things. Organising a wedding is like putting up a big show. If I were to get married in future, I think I might choose to elope. Hee. That's the easiest and most fuss-free option. Just have some close family and friends around without all the fanfare of having to go round 40-60 tables taking photographs sometimes with people whom you don't even know!

Sitting at the same table as me, were my friends from junior college (the bride's our classmate). And everyone got updated on who's getting married, who's gotten married, who has babies etc. Then talk veered to as usual, flats and property. Oh goodness, I feel so out of the loop. I guess it's because I'm not at the stage in my life yet. I might not even reach that point! Everyone's settling down! I'm beginning to feel out of place! Ah well. Que Sera Sera.

Anyway, other happenings--I nearly knocked someone down yesterday while driving to the wedding dinner. No fault of mine! The light had turned green for the cars to go, and this Chinese man in his 30s saunters/strolls across the road and he was right in the middle of the lane I was on! What an idiot! Thank goodness I was still only starting to accelerate and I didn't have to step hard on the brakes. Otherwise the car at the back might have bumped into me and I would also have knocked the guy down. And I was still so nice--I didn't horn at him! I should have done so.

So it's the start of another week. The sky looked nice and blue on my way to work. Let's hope this means this is going to be a good day and a good week ahead!

I Need An Eyelash Curler

*WARNING* -- Bimbotic Entry Ahead (but I think befitting of a Friday. :p )

The thing about long eyelashes is that, while it's really nice to have it , it sometimes poses some inconvenience.

For example, it tends to dirty the lens of my glasses easily because the ends of the lashes keep brushing against it. Thus I keep having to wipe my glasses. So i guess that means i should use my contacts more often and show off those lashes! haha!

I also remember how my lashes got in the way during biology lessons back in secondary school and junior college whenever a microscope had to be used. Sometimes my vision is slightly obscured 'cos I can see the ends of my lashes. I guess that calls for some mascara or some eyelash curler to curl those lashes!

But hey, I'm not complaining. I llluuurve my lashes! heehee.

*flutters them lashes*

My Dilemma

What do you do when you're on a bus and you're sitting down, and you can't decide whether you should give up your seat to a woman whom you can't make out is pregnant or just erm, fat?

Cross reference: An episode of Seinfeld, where Jerry and George decide to be a good Samaritan but end up being thumped on the head because the woman got very offended at being mistaken for being pregnant.

Ironing

I don't know about others, but I hate ironing clothes. It's the one household chore which I absolutely dread. I mean, not that I like doing the chores 'cos if I had a choice, I would rather be a tai-tai and leave it to the maid! Hee.

Anyway, I just find ironing troublesome and frankly I suck at it, especially when it comes to ironing long pants/trousers. When I'm ironing the latter, I never get it right. Somehow the folds just never seem to be able to flatten out properly and there'll be some creases lingering despite my best efforts. Ah yes, same goes for shirts. It's so hard to press a shirt properly! Maybe I'm just terribly incompetent, but I find the sleeves and the parts where the buttons are extremely difficult to iron well.

What's more, ironing is just not fun in Singapore where the weather's so hot. Most of the time after I'm done with the ironing, I will inevitably find beads of sweat on my skin. The heat from the iron (especially so with steam irons) just makes me perspire! I hate it.

As a result, I like to buy clothes which require minimal ironing, or even better, none at all. Clothes of such nature are usually those made out of polyester or some synthetic fabric, or clothes that are creased on purpose. These type of clothes suit lazy people like me to a tee!

Chicken & Egg Situation

Have you ever wondered how it is possible for chickens to lay an egg every day? I mean, how is it that these birds' bodies produce an egg of that size every single day when female humans (in general) only produce one egg a month, and it's something that's only visible if looked through a microscope?

For some bizarre reason, my friend and I were musing about this last night over dinner last night. We ate at IndoChine, the Boat Quay branch. The four of us chose to sit alfresco, which was nice 'cos a cool breeze was blowing and there were whifts of vanilla coming from the incense that were stuck in the potted plants placed between tables. Serving IndoChina cuisine, the food selection there has selected dishes from Vietnam, Laos and Thailand. It's a very small selection though, mainly spring rolls for starters and bowls of noodles for mains.

The food at IndoChine is nothing to shout about, but people go there for the ambience as it's a nice place to sit down, have dinner and chat. The subtle smell of vanilla incense lullss one into a relaxed mood while lounging in big comfortable chairs. Low warm lighting combined with candlelight creates a contemplative mood perfect for conversation.

For starters, I shared some fresh ricepaper rolls with my friends. Rather bland, and it's definitely something I could have done myself! Definitely not worth $8+++! For mains, I had a bowl of Seafood Tom Yum noodles which was pretty good, but nothing to rave about 'cos I've tasted better ones. But I did love the two very fresh tiger prawns inside. :)

Anyway, so yes, back to the chickens. They've been in the news a lot these days with the newly discovered bird flu virus in Malaysia. So now prices of eggs have gone up because of the import ban on eggs and poultry from Malaysia where the bulk of Singapore's chicken and egg supply comes from. Argh...this is depressing....'cos I like eating chicken and eggs!

Even mooncakes that are now selling in preparation for the Mid-Autumn Festival are going up in price because of the yolks that are put into them! But this doesn't affect me that much 'cos I like eating mooncakes without egg yolks in them. I can't wait for the Mid-Autumn Festival to come! It's my favourite 'cos I love the lanterns that hang around during this period....makes the whole place very pretty! I'm going to get myself some lanterns this year!

Cruising

On Sunday as my grandma got out of the car after I had driven her home, she complained that I drive too fast. Well, maybe I am becoming a bit of a speed demoness. I wasn't always like that--I used to be quite a timid driver when I first started driving. But as the years have gone by, I've become more aggressive and bolder in my driving.

I was making small talk with someone who gave me a lift home the other day and she said that she doesn't enjoy driving even though it's something she does every day because of her job nature (she's in sales). This young lady says she thinks driving is a very male thing. She went, "It's just very man you know." But she goes on to say that she drives also because she wants to prove to the men that women can drive.

Personally I enjoy driving and I like being behind the wheel and just cruising with my favourite music playing and me singing along to it. I've never really thought about it being a male/female thing. I mean, yeah, I know how there's the thing about women not being to park and all, but I've never given much thought to it.

I just like to zip myself from place to place. Hopefully I'll be able to have a car of my own one day, and it'll definitely be a convertible SUV! Or some cabriolet would be cool too! My dream is to drive one of these along the Great Ocean Road with the top open with my favourite music playing to the accompaniment of the sounds of the ocean. I shall continue to dream on......

Non-Answers

I hate non-answers like this:

[question asked as the person is stepping out of the door]

Q: Where are you going?
A: Out.

[door slams shut]

DUH. Terribly annoying.

The Hair Affair

My 11-year-old student got angry with me on Saturday 'cos I didn't end the class on time. At 3pm, he said "Miss Ho, it's 3 o'clock already. I have a birthday party to go to and it starts at 3."

But I refused, 'cos earlier he and two other classmates of his took 20min for their break--twice the amount of time they should, which resulted in us not being able to finish the work that was supposed to be covered. I told him that it was his own fault that class had to end late.

Usually they play at the landing just outside the entrance of the tuition centre and I have call them back in when time's up. But this time they decided to play hide-and-seek. I was too tired to go running around looking for them, so I just waited. The principal of the tuition centre then went looking for them and found them at the stairwell. Bloody crafty kids.

So he sulked with blatant displeasure and reluctantly finished up the worksheet before stomping off. Yah like whatever. I'm not here to be popular. These kids ought to be taught a thing or two about punctuality and responsibility.

And I noticed something else. Men make such a big fuss about their hair and this starts from a young age!

Before class started, this same boy and his classmates were playing outside and so they were wet with perspiration at the start of the class. As we were getting ready to start, he goes, "Oh no! I forgot to bring a comb!"

And I'm like, "What do you need a comb for????" I mean, he's got a crew cut for heaven's sake! The hair's not going to go awry or out of place! As he fiddles with his short little fringe he goes, "Aiyah, you don't understand lah. It's sweaty..." at which point I ask him to sit down and get ready for class.

I also remember how my then six-year-old cousin used to sulk and pout whenever someone meddled with his gelled-up hair. The little kid would get testy and unhappy if his nicely combed hair was so much as touched by someone! Unbelievable.

But I suppose it's forgivable. It's one of the few things guys can actually fuss about!

New Prime Minister

Being the, ahem, patriotic citizen that I am, I sat through the entire National Day Rally speech made by newly inaugrated Prime Minister Lee Hsien Loong last night. Well yes, I amazed myself too. I mean, it was a 3-hour speech for god's sake! But fact is, I wanted to listen to what he had to say and the direction in which he wants to steer Singapore in.

Some notable topics: Baby bonuses (as usual); changing people's mindsets towards having children; equal medical benefits for women & men in the civil service; 5-day workweek for those in the service (previously it was 5 1/2); a more open and liberalised society by doing away with restrictions to speak/perform in public as long as the topics steer away from race & religion; China-Taiwan cross straits issue; more active citizenry by calling out to young Singaporeans to step forward and make themselves heard.

There were plenty of goodies for those with children under 12 or those planning to have children (all nothing to do with moi!). These included the lowering of the maid levy for families with children below 12, to longer maternity leave and childcare leave. To me, it's all well and good for those who already have children. However I still think this isn't going to convince people to have children.

There is supposedly also going to be a reduction in school syllabi. PM Lee said that we have to let them [the children] study less so they can learn more. About time! I don't know if this will really materialise but I sure hope it does. Singaporean kids study too much and need to play more. Else, we'll just end up with a whole generation of nerds!

Of course there were some points in time in which I sneered and raised my cynical head, but by and large, I am feeling optimistic about the future of Singapore which is something I haven't felt in a long time. Yes, maybe I've been drawn into the rhetoric. The spin doctors have worked their intended magic. But I figured it wouldn't hurt to be less cynical. For a while. ;p

Singapore may not be the best place to live in, but I reckon it's not the worst either. Of course, there are things which I wished Singapore had. But these are things which will never happen so I should just stop hankering after them and live with the fact that I'll have to do without mountains, lakes, rivers, nice beaches, lush green forests, snow, autumn leaves, clear blue skies, wide open spaces etc. Seriously, no place's perfect, so the next best thing is to try and make the place perfect for myself and those around me!

The Mane Issue

Would it be very strange if I said I don't own a comb/brush? No, seriously, I don't. I usually wet my hair and tousle it with a bit of wax to make it look presentable. Somehow my hair's natural waves just fall into place. So I just don't bother with a comb/brush.

While we're on the subject of hair, are men really more attracted to women with long hair?

A few weeks ago, this newspaper columnist, whom I would say can be likened to Singapore's Carrie Bradshaw when I'm feeling nice (otherwise she's just the resident bimbo), wrote that men are generally attracted to women with long flowing locks. Like with everything else being equal, men would choose the woman with long hair over one with short.

If that's the case, I'm doomed then. And prob explains the dearth of eligible men knocking on my door. Hahaha!

But we should do a straw poll here. Is it true that men are more attracted to a woman with long hair as compared to short (ceteris paribus)?

Terribly Lost In Translation

For the past two weeks or so, Ive been editing and proofreading the manuscripts of a book that's due to be published. By right, I should only be doing the former, but it's just such a badly translated book (from Chinese) that I just have to wield my pen.

I just have to gripe about this book 'cos it has made my life a living hell for the past two weeks. Because three translators (all equally crap in my opinion) worked on the book, the English version of the book is riddled with inconsistencies with regard to proper names (mostly of companies and state departments). For the same thing in Chinese, I can get three different names in English.

So I've been busy making sure that all the names are consistent, checking for spelling mistakes which are aplenty, and also making sure that the translations are correct, which to my chagrin, often aren't.

In addition to being editor and proofreader, I find myself having to be translator as well as I've had to go back to the original text to doublecheck what has been written. Often, I've had to rephrase the expression as it sounds awkward, mainly because it's been translated word-for-word. In one instance, I had to translate three paragraphs as the translator, *grasp*, conveniently left it out!

It's a good thing I can read and understand Chinese, otherwise I wouldn't have been able to pick out the inconsistencies and ridiculous translations.

Odd expressions, which can sometimes lead to embarrassing situations, tend to arise when a literal word-for-word translation is done. This by the way is called the Grammar-Translation Method which is the worst possible way to translate text. It is also a term used in foreign language teaching, and to most, if not all teachers, is also the worst possible method to teach.

To digress a bit, the mainland Chinese curriculum requires students to do translation exercises in English language learning. That to me is just ridiculous because translation is a whole different ball game all together. Mastering a foreign language for everyday use is difficult enough. Having to do translation is just too demanding when it's something that requires specialised training and a good grasp of both languages.

Here are four examples of the odd expressions I was talking about:

1) Obscene Rabbit -- this was the title of a book which was translated into English from the Chinese title <<流氓兔>>. However, this Chinese title was also translated from a Korean title (as it was originally a Korean children's book). 流氓 in Chinese means a rascal, or one of those ruffians or juvenile delinquents. Something along those lines, but definitely not 'obscene'!

I changed it to 'Rascal Rabbit'. But I still thought it sounded weird...this is after all a children's book! I then decided to try my luck and googled '流氓兔' to see if I could somehow come across an English title. And guess what it turned out to be??? The cute Korean cartoon rabbit - MashiMaro!!!

I mean, 'Obscene Rabbit' is just WAY-OFF! I don't know how in the world the translator could have come up with that! I definitely wouldn't want my name in the book if the book had gone to print with 'Obscene Rabbit' in it!

2) 刮目相看 was literally translated to 'to look at [the market] with new eyes'. A more accurate translation would be to see something/someone in a different [positive] light and not new eyes!

3) 立体折纸 was literally translated to 'Three Dimensional Paper Folding'. I thought this was rather odd and thought maybe it could be referring to Japanese Origami. I was proved right when I checked up the name of the book on the net.

4) 八卦周刊 was translated to 'Gossip-potpourri magazine'. I promptly changed this to 'tabloid'!

Anyway, my 15-17 hour workday should end by this week. The book HAS to go to print by Friday.

On a more positive note, I must say I've learnt a lot from this. There are so many details to take note of when proofreading! I've also learnt a new language--the one used by editors and proofreaders to communicate to typesetters what changes need to be made on a manuscript. I now know all these weird symbols at the back of my hand!

Also, I think my Chinese has improved marginally with all that reading of the Chinese text! I'm also more aware of grammar, punctuation, and editing rules. Had to do lots of reading up as I went along!

I suppose the Chinese author appreciates the efforts of my colleague and myself. He told me to add our names in the acknowledgements. The irony is that I was the one who wrote my own name in as I was editing the piece! Haha.

Anyway, can't wait to get this over and done with!

Let the Games Begin

So the Games have begun! I watched a repeat telecast of the opening ceremony of the Olympics on Saturday. Was just too exhausted to go out on Saturday night after all those late hours at work. Was seriously about to collapse after I finished teaching those three kids at the tuition centre in the afternoon.

The opening was spectacular. But I think I prefer the Sydney 2000 opening where Cathy Freeman stood in the middle of that fountain with the flames around her. This time the flame is on this rocket missile-looking structure, and what�s worse, I still don�t know who the person who lit the flame was!

Anyway, I only like to watch certain sports which are (in order of preference):

1) Swimming -- As far as I'm concerned, swimming is THE sport to watch. A must-see. I mean, where else but at the swimming arena can you find the highest concentration of Adonis-like men??? The place's teeming with these demi-gods!

I feel like suing Speedo -- that sharksuit is the worst invention ever! It's depriving viewers like myself of eye-candy! Those rippling muscles, broad shoulders, and washboard abs are all hidden under that awful sharksuit!

Forget about the women's swimming events! I'm only interested in men's swimming! (Yes I admit - I'm superficial, shallow and bimbotic.)

But swimming's fun to watch 'cos it's so exciting! Everything's over in a flash...not like a marathon!

2) Gymnastics - I love to watch both the men's and women's events. I especially like the women doing rhythmic gym with the ribbon and hula hoop. I love to see that ribbon twirling. Looks very fun. I want a ribbon like that to twirl around too.

3) Diving (including synchronised diving) - for the sheer elegance as the divers make turns in mid-air and land in a plop (hopefully a small one) in the pool.

4) Synchronisd swimming - isn't it amazing how these groups of women are able to execute every moment at precisely the same time? Plus there's nice music to listen to and elegant moves to look at.

5) Track - only the sprint events. Anything beyond 800m is a bore.

6) Tennis - I'll watch only when Juan Carlos Ferrero plays. And ah, maybe Roger Federer too. Hee.

ooohhh, can't wait to watch the 200m freestyle final tonight. South Africa was sensational last night with their 4 x 100m freestyle relay win! I think I should prepare a bib for myself. ;p

Toilet Etiquette

Some Chinese nationals really need to be educated in the ways of the civilised world.

I'm so pissed (pun unintended!) with the way they use toilets. I'm not sure what the situation in the Gents is (and I sure as hell don't even want to know), but these ladies from China really need a lesson or two in toilet etiquette.

You see, my office is next to this restaurant which has hordes of Chinese tourists coming every day during lunch and dinner time. Unfortunately, I have to use the same washroom as they do. These people really don't know how to use toilets:-

1) They don't lock the doors--Once, I opened three cubicles, and in each cubicle there was someone inside. Like "hello???? There's a lock on the door! You just have to exercise some simple motor skills here!"

So now, to avoid any potentially embarrassing situations (obviously they don't seem to see anything embarrassing in someone accidentally walking in on them mid-way in their business), I now peep through the small slit between the door and the wall, and look at the reflection on the tiles to see if there's anyone inside before I enter the cubicle.

2) They stand on the toilet seats--I'm not sure if the adults do that (hopefully not) but I've seen a mother letting her daughter stand on the toilet bowl so that she can assume the squatting position while peeing. Like for goodness sake, teach your child how to use a toilet bowl!

3) They don't know how to discard toilet paper properly--Instead of disposing used toilet paper in the toilet bowl and flushing it away, these people throw it on top of the sanitary napkin bin and make a big mess of the cubicle. The poor cleaner ends up having to clean up after these people every day.

4) They are forever looking for squatting toilets--Every time I happen to be in the toilet when a group of them are, I'll always hear the word "蹲" (dun) meaning 'to squat' in Chinese. They'll keep asking where the squatting toilet is, and resign in disappointment when they come to terms with the fact that they have to do without it at this toilet!

I suppose it'll take a while before these people learn how to lock doors and observe proper toilet etiquette. Hell, the Singapore government has been trying to educate Singaporeans for the longest time, but we still get people behaving like barbarians. Annoying.

A Year Old

Thanks to overacuppa's well-wishes, I've just realised that dimsumdolly.com has just turned 1!

I still remember my initial apprehension of starting a blog. I had never written for an audience and wasn't very confident about my writing. In any case, I decided to start blogging 'cos I had seen how much fun Monoceros and VanTan were having with theirs. At that point in time, I was also studying in Sydney, and thus had quite a lot of things to write about...new experiences and all.

Blogging has not only allowed me to keep in touch with old friends, it has also brought me new ones. Because of my blog, I got to know dear friends like Monkey and Chungking. And through them, I also got to know UrbanNomad and Otiose. And I must not forget my blog friends like Victor who never fails to amuse with his comments, and also Seine who's from Hawaii!

After I started blogging, I also started to surf other blogs. It's interesting to read other people's blogs -- rather voyeuristic, but interesting nonetheless. It really provides a window into other people's lives and it's fun to read their writings. There are so many gifted writers out there, and I'm always in awe of people who write well. I also enjoy surfing photo blogs and food blogs, as these are two of my favourite subjects. Hee.

Writing in my blog has become quite a good creative outlet and an avenue for spewing nonsense and random thoughts. Or musings. Or whatever you want to call it. Blogging also made me acquainted with html when I experimented with fonts, colours, headers, images etc. So I must say it has done some good, apart from making me spend time on the computer typing out my nonsensical thoughts all too often.

Anyway, I've been having fun with this blog and hope that readers who have surfed by have had fun too during their visits!

Here's to turning 1!

Chinese Education

While in China, I learnt a couple of new terms. It's interesting how things are known by different names in different countries. Here are some terms I learnt:

China --- S'pore

1) 计程车 --- 德士

In China they call the taxi a "car that calculates distance" (a very crude literal translation) whereas in Singapore we call it "de shi" which sounds phonetically like "taxi".

2) 计算机 --- 电脑

What is known as a computer in China would be the term used for a calculator in Singapore. Imagine my confusion when everyone was talking about a 计算机 when what they were really referring to was a computer!

3) 空调 --- 冷气机

This is an interesting one. In China, an air-conditioner is known as an air regulator. Whereas in Singapore we call it a "cold air machine" (a crude literal translation). I say it's interesting because the terminology has been dictated by the climate. Because of its temperate climate, the air-conditioner in Beijing spews out hot air in winter while there's cold air in summer. In Singapore, all that ever comes out of the aircon is cold air because of our tropical climate. Hence we just know it as a 冷气机 .

I was wondering what a 空调 was when the company driver asked me if I wanted it to be switch on. But I managed to figure it out after pondering for a minute.

Another thing I noticed is that taxis in Beijing don't usually turn on the aircon, presumably to save on fuel I suppose. However, as the air in Beijing is so bad and the roads are always so congested, I reckon it's best to hop into one whose driver has decided to have the aircon turned on. To do so, all one has to do is to look out for a taxi whose windows are up.

Unfortunately, those were few and far between. I had no choice but to hop into ones with their windows down. And when making my request to have the aircon turned on, they pretended not to hear me! Or just plain ignored me! Horrible!

4) 饭店 --- 酒店 A different terminlogy for a hotel

饭 = rice 酒 = alcohol 店 = shop/accommodation

So you see, it's all about food & lodging for us Chinese! That's most important to us! haha!

5) 自行车 - 脚踏车 A different terminology for a bicycle

Literally translated, in China they call it a "vehicle you ride on your own" while in Singapore it's a "vehicle ridden with your legs".

6) 发表 -- what to say when you want to get a receipt to claim for service tax or claim from the company for travel expenses!

So that was my pathetic Chinese education in the few days in Beijing.

Problem Fixed

Thanks to Van installing the MT-Blacklist, I've just successfully gotten rid of all the spam comments. I'm happy again. I don't feel like I no longer want to write again.

I wished there was something we could do to prevent these spammers once and for all, but unfortunately these annoying things are here to stay.

Violated

I feel like my blog's been raped! My blog's been spammed by more than 1200 comments by those stupid spammers! Arrrggghhhh! I'm so annoyed!!! All those gross and lewd words! Yucks!!! It's going to take me ages to delete all of them!

Hopefully the anti-spam measures that Van has kindly helped to install will help reduce the number of spam comments I get.

If this carries on, I don't feel like writing anymore. :(

Chemistry

Over dinner last night, monomania said it would be interesting to study how chemistry between people work. I mean like, the other person, whether male or female, could be a perfectly nice person but yet the two of you can't seem to click.

We figured it's probably to do with background, common interests, language (we don't really seem to click with the more Chinese-speaking people) and god knows what.

Ah well, something to think about over the weekend. Have a good one everyone!

Pool Etiquette

I say children should be banned from swimming in the adult pool! They should just stick to the baby pool where they belong!!!

Children are irritating objects waddling in the pool - they prevent me from doing my laps without interruption. They fleet in and out of your lane and are squealing away at something half the time.

Also, some people just don't observe pool etiquette. I'm doing my laps in this lane and some idiot comes along and takes over my lane! Like hello????!!! Go to the other lanes which are unoccupied! Stupid guy. I didn't want to kick up a fuss seeing that there were other lanes available so I swam over instead.

Should have given this guy a kick while swimming past.

New Books

Oh, I went to the library today and picked up the book I had reserved from the library catalogue. The book is Nigel Slater's (the food columnist from The Observer) autobiography called Toast: The Story of a Boy's Hunger.

Anyway, this is not a review but just wanted to say what a thrill it was to pick up a book which was spanking new and still filled with the wonderful smell of newly-minted paper.

Rather perverse I know, but I love to flip the book open and run the pages under my nose.

hee.

Preparations

Here's something my friends in Sydney can do for me before I come storming in - Make reservations at a slew of eating places with yummy food! A yumcha session at East Ocean restaurant must be included!!!

Hahaha!

Done!

Yeah! Article completed! Article and invoice emailed to the editor!

And oh, I'm swimming away from that ornamental fish article. I saw some sample articles in English and decided that it would be too difficult for me to extract similar info from interviewees in Mandarin. I would screw it up and that's something I don't want to happen.

Time to get breakfast.

Daily Reminder

It's 6am, I'm having the radio on and the national anthem has just blasted through the airwaves.

I don't understand this daily morning ritual of the TV and radio stations. It's a short 20sec clip, but still, do Singaporeans need to be reminded every day of their citizenry?

I don't.

Fishy Thoughts

One 'drawback' about my current job is that I cannot claim to be unaware of what's going on in Singapore and around the world. I can't play the role of the ignorant fool. Now that's a bummer.

Other musings:

I think my fish's depressed. He isn't eating well and he doesn't seem to have much life in him. His tail and fins are also losing their colour. What am I to do??? I don't have fish fingers! Judging by the current situation, I might soon have to post an obitruary for him....

Speaking of obitruaries, employees of the company I'm working in can get discounted rates if they want to place an obitruary in the papers. What would they think if I took one out for my fish? heh.

On other fishy business, I've just been asked if I would like to take on a freelance writing job to write a report on the ornamental fish industry in China. It's for a trade magazine for the ornamental fish industry. Approximately 2,000 words in length, 40cents per word, so that works out to about $800.

The difficult part of this job is having to make overseas calls and conduct interviews in Mandarin. Now, my Mandarin isn't ttoooo bad when it comes to making small talk. But conducting an interview on ornamental fish??? Hmmm....I'll have to let the idea swim in my head over the weekend before I decide if I want to take the plunge.

Tomorrow there's going to be another one of those frivolous and silly articles in the lifestyle section of the newspapers about the popularity of American Chinese men amongst Singaporean women. I have a feeling such a story about Singaporean women hooking American Chinese fish will open a can of worms 'cos the forum will surely be flooded by responses to the article.

And oh, auditions for Singapore Idol start today. Idol fever is on. There have been reports of people quitting their jobs just to practise for the auditions. Others have taken to booking rooms at hotels near Suntec City (where the auditions are being held) so that it serves as a resting place while they and their group of friends take turns to queue in line. People have started queueing since 1pm yesterday. I'm waiting to see how many William Hungs we'll have. It's amazing to see how many wannabes out there who are fishing for fame!

Anyway, so much for my Saturday morning musings.

Singapore Girl

HI, I got to your site looking for picture of Poppies! I just wanted to
say that for a film you didn't like much you have lots to say about
it...so it must have made some sort of impression huh? Obviously you are
Malaysian lah! I was an exchange student there in 1995-6 in JB.
Wonderful memories! Elizabeth.

This comment was made to yesterday's entry on Troy. I'm intrigued by the "Obviously you are Malaysian lah!" part. I've sent an email to the author to ask why she thinks I'm Malaysian.

As for the part about films, I usually have stuff to say about the films I watch whether good or bad. After all, I did some modules on it for my undergrad studies.

And just for the record, I'm NOT Malaysian.

Four Husbands

I can officially be charged with polygamy. I'm married to:

1) Monkey, my betrothed in Sydney ;p
2) the PC at work
3) the Mac at work
4) the PC at home

It's a complicated thing. I have to use two computers at work 'cos they perform different functions. The PC's right in front of me when I'm seated while a big Mac (haha, I know it sounds like a burger, but no, it's just that the monitor's huge!) sits to my right. I shan't go into the intricacies of what functions they perform.

So yes, what the hell am I doing at the computer again at home after having gotten off two of them barely an hour ago???? I'm insane.

But you see, I can't reply to personal emails at work. Well, not can't per se. I would just rather not do so. While at work, I'd also rather not read my friends' blogs nor update my blog. I wouldn't want people from work to find out about it. If they do so, that means I can't bitch about work! heh.

The thing about Husbands No. 2 & 3 is that there's no divorcing them - at least not for the time being.

I'm off to bed now. The irony is that a husband doesn't exist for bedtime. I need a 5th. ;p

About Me

Writing about myself is harder than expected. I've been thinking of writing a short "About Me" paragraph to be placed on my blog but I can't seem to nail anything down.

I came across a blog whose author had a separate web page for "A Hundred Things About Me". But I don't think I'll head there as I doubt readers will bother to plough through the page if I came up with something like that.

Maybe I should do a compilation of comments my friends say about me.

Anyways, I'll mull over the possibilities.

Baring My Sole

D:
I have to paint my toe nails 'cos I want to wear open-toed shoes tomorrow.

Me:
I don't believe such a colour exists. Argh forget it. I can't be bothered.

Yes, I can't be bothered - not unless I'm going to some evening function or it's, *gasp*, my own wedding. I don't even own a bottle of nail polish. I've never gone for a manicure or pedicure either. I should do so one day just to pamper myself. Maybe I'll treat myself to one when my birthday comes along.

So to my friend D, whom I usually have the most bimbotic, silliest and most bitchy conversations with (I love it btw!), nail polish to nails is like clothes to our body. Without that film of colour shrouding the nails, the toes are starked naked. Tramping around town in unpainted nails is tantamount to indecent exposure - a criminal let loose and on the wanted list of the fashion police.

Ok, let's do a poll here - Is it really rude to not have one's toe nails painted when wearing open-toed shoes?

Meanwhile for this weekend, I'll continue to be on D's fashion police squadron's hit list. ;p

I Want More of This!!!

I get a kick out of sending invoices especially when the invoice is mine! Hahaha! Just billed someone for an article I wrote. Cheap thrill.

The Frog Prince

I was inundated by news of the Danish royal wedding yesterday. I'm now inspired to do an � la Donaldson and snag a prince for myself. I read that the bar in which the couple met in Sydney has started organising "Meet the Prince" sessions. Perhaps I should stake out there. However, I reckon I'll probably have to kiss a thousand toads first before the prince appears. Oh well.

TomGirl

"All the girlishness has gone to your voice", declares D who's one of my best friends.

"I think there's some element of girlishness in every woman. For you, everything has gone to your voice," D reiterates.

Did I just get a swipe? That was like sugar laced with arsenic if you ask me. But it is admittedly true. I'm not a girly gal -- My clothes don't have frills and lace hanging from all corners; I don't have the requisite long-flowing locks; I don't know how to act coy; I don't paint my nails; I can be quite a slob at times etcetc

Yes, you get the idea. I guess my voice's my saving grace. Hahaha! D says I sound like a little girl. Oh well, it doesn't bother me that I don't fit into the girly mold. It's just not ME and I would like to think that my friends like me for what and who I am.

But hey, that's not to say I don't enjoy being a woman. It's just that I think I've got a bit of the tomboy in me. Haha!

Note of Apology

To all, well ok not ALL, but many Singaporean men:

The DSD hereby apologises for implying you are vertically challenged. She has been recently plagued by a bout of pimples, which her friend otiose attributes to retribution for the hobbit call made couple of days back.

For vanity's sake, the DSD promises to stop such name-calling for the time being. Poor DSD is being punished for speaking the truth. Honesty obviously isn't the best policy in this case.

Meanwhile, it's MAC's foundation to the rescue!

A Leopard's New Spots

*Warning - Bimbotic Rant Ahead*

I'm devastated by the zits that have sprouted on my face! wwwwaaaaahhhhhhhh!!!!

My hitherto zit-free face has suddenly decided that it should do for my face what it failed to do during puberty.

Ok ok, it's not THAT bad. It's just a couple of red spots on my forehead. But it's bad by my standards considering the fact that I've never had pimples.

Boohoohoo. Now, in addition to the freckles on my cheeks, I have more spots on my face!

Hobbiton Inc

My good friend D said I was extremely mean when I said the following line during another one of our mindless chats last night.

I said, "I'm very sure Tolkien had Singaporean men in mind when he invented the Hobbits."

heehee. ;p

In Teacher Mode

It's a good thing I didn't decide to highlight my hair with blond or copper-red streaks when I went to have a haircut on Saturday. I don't think the primary school would have appreciated those colours in my hair had I turned up for work like that.

Teachers are condemned to a lifetime of dull hair colours and dressing (people can almost always tell if someone's a teacher). C'est tragic.

Another Take On History

After making her debut on the small screen, the Dolly now wants to conquer the big screen and put her stamp on celluloid. Her big screen debut will be in the movie Crouching Dolly, Hidden Dragon.

Setting: The State of Qin (秦) during the Warring States Period of ancient China (475 - 221 BC) aka 战国时代

An ancient scroll harbouring the secret recipe of the famous egg tarts sold by Xianyang city's (the capital of Qin state) most popular inn has been stolen. The innkeeper, Overacuppa, is distraught and seeks the help of her good friend the 点心娃娃 aka the DimSumDolly to retrieve the scroll.

The Dolly is a free-spirited swordswoman or a 侠女, as is more popularly known in kungfu flicks, who pleads allegiance to no one, and comes and go at her own will.

In view of the Dolly's recent dabblings with calligraphy, she earns her keep by writing food reviews after making her rounds at the taverns and inns around Xianyang. Her pen or rather brush, is indeed mightier than the sword. Her one-foot long calligraphy brush's tip is so sharp that it slices through her enemies' flesh when wield. Like an octopus, the brush is also able to spew ink to drive enemies away.

Dolly decides to enlist the help of her sworn brother Monkey in her quest to retrieve the scroll. Monkey, nicely rested from his sabbathical after an arduous Journey to the West is all raring to go. I would presume he's much happier escorting a hot-blooded Dolly as compared to a celibate monk.

Dressed in long-flowing chiffon white robes bellowing around her like a floating cloud, the Dolly's benign appearance is a perfect foil to the swordswoman who lies beneath.

As Dolly and Monkey proceed in their quest, they are joined by a few others. First up is a Hindi-spewing white envoy from India, otherwise known as Chungking. The sight of Chungking leaves Dolly and Monkey baffled as they have never come across a white man from India before. Monkey, even after his foray into India while obtaining the scriptures, had never encountered such a person. They conclude that he's one of the baddies and start to draw their brush and cudgel, ready to attack.

Then Chungking starts speaking in Cantonese hurriedly to clear the misunderstanding. Soon, all three are speaking like they have known each other forever and Chungking decides to join them on their quest.

While having dimsum at a tavern, the three of them make the acquaintance of a travelling swordsman known as UrbanNomad. True to his moniker, he wanders from city to city within the Warring States and avoids the countryside. Sensing adventure, he also decides to join the recipe-hunting poss�.

And of course the Dolly has to have some romance along the way. At one point, she has a fling with the ruggedly handsome scion of a tavern-franchise proprietor. Her lover-boy will be played by the winner of the programme "Dolly's Eye for the Straight Guy" (part of the prize is a speaking part in this film). It would be best if he came as yummy as Chang Chen did in Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon.

To cut the story short, the search for the ancient scroll leads the four of them to the Imperial Palace of the State of Qin. They have discovered that Ying Zheng, the king of Qin, had actually ordered the theft 'cos he wants the recipe for himself. He wants to use these egg tarts as a bribe to convince the rulers and the people of the other eight states to pledge allegiance to him. Yes, they're THAT good.

Through one of Monkey's bright ideas and the use of his 72 transfigurations, the poss� manages to seek an audience with Ying Zheng to ask for a redress.

Dolly, with her devil-may-care attitude, ticks the Ying Zheng off for his despicable doing. Impressed by her bravado, he gets a silly idea that he wants to have her as a concubine. Horrified by the idea, Dolly gets her friend Victor the imperial advisor to talk Ying Zheng out of it. This imperial advisor thankfully does a good job in dissuading the king by saying that the Dolly would deplete the state's food resources in no time with her penchant for dimsum. Otiose, the court jester, then makes light of the situation by portraying the Dolly as a dim and dumb swordswoman in one of his nightly entertainment skits.

Anyway, the Dolly manages to make Ying Zheng see his folly and convinces him to return the ancient scroll to Overacuppa. Overacuppa's inn is then tasked to produce enough egg tarts to distribute to the rulers and people of the other eight states.

As you will know from history, Ying Zheng did manage to unite all the Warring States to what we now know as 中国 (ZhongGuo). So really, all credit's due to the egg tarts.

The Next Big Thing

Dolly's Eye for the Straight Guy

That's going to be the next hit reality show! It's a fusion of Queer Eye for the Straight Guy (QE), The Bachelorette and American Idol.

Here's how it works: Dolly needs a date so guys (straight ones) will be auditioned.

The honourable panel of judges will comprise of Dolly's three best pals -Monkey, Chungking and UrbanNomad. With their good taste and expertise in men, they will assist Dolly in sieveing out the weeds. And with their quick wit, there'll be lots of laughs and scathing comments which will give Simon Cowell a run for his money!

Auditions will be held at Kam Fook Chinese restaurant in Chatswood, Sydney. This is one of the Dolly's favourite restaurants because of the fresh and wide variety of dimsum served there.

The resturant will be booked for this momentous occasion. But as you know with Chinese restaurants, they always have this big and offensive-looking 喜喜 ("xi" meaning double happiness) looming behind the stage. Thom (from QE) will have to brought in to spruce up the set.

With some fashion and grooming tips from Carson and Kyan respectively, the auditionees will sashay on stage where they will be judged on personal style, grooming and looks. It must be said that the Dolly is partial to a nice tan, broad shoulders and eyes that talk.

Philistines are a definite no-no, so Jai (from QE) will be roped in to help the judges weed out these cultural deserts. I suppose the judges will ask them a couple of questions to test their knowledge of the arts. Monkey, being the culture vulture, is certain to give these guys a grilling.

And there's something very attractive about a man who can cook. Tim (from QE) will be on hand to teach the guys a new dish which they'll have to prepare in the Kam Fook kitchen. The taste test will be done by the judges and the Dolly. How can she possibly sit this one out????

The auditionees will have to sit for the Date-the-Dolly Quiz. The final hurdle is having to eat a plate of sauteed chicken feet and durian (separately of course!).

At the end of the arduous auditions, the Dolly will pick her man, � la The Bachelorette style, by handing the chosen one a bamboo steamer filled with four pieces of siew mai.

NB: This idea will be patented. Anyone who wants to buy the show format, please contact UrbanNomad & Victor who have both been appointed the Dolly's attorneys without their knowing it. ;p

Font Types

I don't know about others, but I'm very particular about the fonts I use in Word documents. I hate/abhor/detest Times New Roman which is like the default on Word. I think it's so old-fashioned and ugly a font.

Fonts are really important aren't they? They contribute to the tone and the overall feel of a book, poster, advertisement etc. It can make or break the whole look of an ad or book cover for example. Goodness knows how long it takes graphic designers to decide on the appropriate fonts!

My default setting for Word is Verdana, point 10. I much prefer this for its modern feel. It looks cleaner too. I'm quite partial to Arial as well, but still prefer Verdana as it doesn't look as stiff. For something more traditional, I go for Garamond or Book Antiqua.

So just out of curiosity, what's your default font setting on Word?

Indigestible Talk

I suppose it's a compliment when some of my friends in Sydney said I'm very un-Singaporean. I never really found out the exact reasons for their saying so, but perhaps it's because I can talk about other things apart from:

1) HDB (Housing Development Board) flats which are government flats that many would-be married couples want to buy

2) ROM-ing (Registry of Marriage). That's just a Singaporean term to mean registering one's marriage in order to get a damn HDB flat.

3) Gym memberships - These days, everyone seems to be a member of the California Fitness Centre.

4) Who's going out with whom; who knows who; whose ex- is whose ex-; - The circle is just tttooooo small in Singapore. The Six Degrees of Separation theory runs so scarily true in Singapore that I reckon it's become incestuous.

So those were the main topics of last night's dinner which I had with some friends. I won't be seeing them again any time soon that's for sure! The food-loving DimSumDolly cannot stomach such talk, sorry.

My New Best Friends

It's official - I'm a fag hag. Gays, I've decided, are my new best friends. But then, I already knew that when I met ChungkingExpress and Monkey in Sydney. I met up with ChungkingExpress' friend, Saz, yesterday and we had a lovely chat at a cafe called Baker's Inn where he has his photographs displayed.

As with ChungkingExpress and Monkey, conversation flowed very easily with Saz. We talked about our mutual love for photography, the arts, foreign film, life in Singapore, our travels and of course, the dearth of interesting men in Singapore. Lament we did about the latter. haha.

Yes, gay men are great to talk to. I can talk to them about the arts, fashion, and really just about anything, which is more than I can say for many of the straight men in Singapore! Before meeting ChungkingExpress and Monkey, I didn't have any gay friends. Thanks to them, I've now discovered the joys of having gays for friends!

Well, I do realise that being a fag hag means less chances of meeting straight men. So I think the best solution for me now is to keep a look out for the metrosexuals. This breed of men are in my opinion, the best, because they combine the best of both worlds - as cultured as the gays AND straight! ;p

Insomniac

It's 3:05am....i don't know what the hell I'm doing up at this hour. Ah well.

Boing Boing Boing

Take the 100 Acre Personality Quiz!

oh gosh! This really proves my group of SCGS friends right! The five of us - overacuppa, monoceros, vantan, Des & I gave each other monikers from the Pooh Bear series many years ago, and we accorded each name based on the similarities of our characters to the characters in the series.

My good friends from the 100-acre wood assigned "Kanga" to me 'cos they said I was "mummy-ish". Yes yes, I always had to be the one who gave morning calls to overacuppa and Des to wake them up if we had arranged to meet up early in the morning. Ggggggrrrrr.....

Now even a computer program agrees with them. Bizarre.

What's Your Colour?

Got this website courtesy of monomania. I'm supposedly blue, but I'll leave it to my friends to judge.

Unique Names

There was an article in yesterday's papers about people with unique names. It's amazing what sort of names people come up with these days.

This man named Rocky Loong owns a landscape design business called Hardscapes Resources and he has named his children Pebble, Boulder and Coral.

Personally I wouldn't stricken my children with such names. Imagine if my husband's surname was Bay. My child would become Pebble Bay. C'est tragic! I think my child would hate me for life.

The Hong Kongers, Taiwanese and Mainland Chinese can come up with some of the most interesting names. The members of one Taiwanese female music trio have the names Windy, Rainy and Sunny. Then there's Fish Leong. There's also the HK director Fruit Chan. Other names that come to mind now are Myolie and Kenix.

I also remember reading that one Singaporean scientist is called Atomic. The name however was not of his choosing. This scientist's father was really into science, and he named his children Atomic, Hydrogen, Nitrogen etc.

I once had a driving instructor named Valentino Tan. I nearly choked when I saw his name tag. He was so NOT a Valentino. I've also met someone named Antonio Chan before. The Italian name "Antonio" is just very incongruent with a Chinese face, know what I mean?

Anyway, I'm beginning to think that I should go with the second character in my chinese name "May" instead of "Joan". The latter seems to pose so many problems in terms of spelling and pronunciation for many people. The nasal sounding diphthong is a problem for many. Worse still, many think it's a boys' name and look appalled that I have adopted a male name. They think it's "John" and that I merely spelt it wrong. The remaining would have never heard the name before.

If anyone has any interesting names to share, please do so!

Five Years

"Where do you see yourself in five years' time?" / "Where do you see yourself in future?"

I need to start thinking of a good answer to those two questions when asked during interviews. I always fumble and just try to come up with some vague answer about rising up the ranks in the organisation and hopefully helping younger people in their careers.

Seriously, I just don't know! I don't wish to be so directionless either, but I've just come out into the working world and I'm still exploring my choices. I haven't experienced enough to know what is it that I want and don't want. Well ok, I have SOME idea, but five years is just a bit far off for me at the moment.

Still, I should try to formulate a better answer...

Disappearing Sands

I have noticed that the children's playgrounds in Singapore these days are devoid of sandpits. The grounds are usually paved with colourful sponge foam boards instead of the sandpits I used to know as a child.

Frankly I moan the loss of sandpits in playgrounds. I remember how my sis, cousins, friends and I used to build sandcastles, or some odd-shaped creature in the sandpits. We would also have little "tea parties", filling our little cups and plates with sand, pretending it was food.

True, these sponge foam boards are probably safer just in case a kid falls from a swing or slide or whatever. But we turned out fine and nothing happened to us.

I notice parents in Singapore have this aversion to dirt. They're always telling the child "Don't touch this 'cos you'll get dirty!" or "Don't go there 'cos it's dirty." I mean come on, it's no big deal, it's just a little bit of mud and sand.

From my observation, I like how many parents in Sydney give their children more freedom to roam and play. Children there seem to have more opportunities to explore without fear of their parents berating them for getting dirty by playing in the mud, grass or sand.

The Singapore government's "Clean & Green" campaign has certainly gotten a hold on the people's psyche.

Musing about Muses

We are often defined, to a certain extent, by what we do for a living. There are certain expectations and perceptions of people in any kind of job. For example, a teacher's supposed to be patient and caring; accountants are meticulous and good with numbers; engineers are the nerds etc.

Once, while having a meal with Monkey in a cafe at Cronulla beach, I was flipping through a magazine and came across this person in a photo spread who listed her occupation as "A Muse". I was in turn amused at this description. Photographed next to her was a man whom I remember listed himself as a writer or some artist. Can't remember which one, but it ran along those lines.

What an interesting label...to call yourself a muse. I wonder what a muse does. Sit and look pretty? Spout all sorts of nonsense/ideas to inspire the writer/artist? How is a muse paid? By what terms and conditions does she work by? Flexi-hours? Is a muse eligible for annual leave or is one allowed to take off at a whim? Hmm....some food for thought there.

A muse sounds like a cool occupation though. Next time I board a plane, I'm going to write "Muse" in the "Occupation" box of the immigration card. I think I've written "church mouse" before. Haha.

Meanwhile, if any cute, eligible bachelor writer/artist is looking for a muse, please drop me a line. ;p

If Only

A friend of mine and her boyfriend have recently gone to Sydney to study for their PhDs. She arrived in Sydney last week and I received an email from her yesterday saying that she misses Singapore very much and that she feels like taking a flight back.

And here I am, hoping against hope, wishing so much that I could swap places with her!!! Like hello, I'm putting up my hand here, waving madly, but the teacher doesn't see me.

While looking for permanent accommodation, she's staying at North Sydney, and she describes overlooking the Sydney Harbour and the Opera House. Ah, certainly brings back fond memories! And she says she's not sure if there're cute guys or not, but maybe she'll be able to find a hunk surfing along the coast. To that I say, the pool of men in Sydney is definitely better than in Singapore! There's so much more eye-candy over there. Of course I was "eating" my heart out, enjoying the visual treat while I was there. ;p

She says she has also gotten a nice tan from all the walking in the sun, though she finds the sun rays a tad too strong. For me, I loved the clear blue skies and sunshine! I really miss all the walking I used to do in Sydney. I really enjoyed walking everywhere - walking to and from Pymble station, the coastlines, the parks, around the city. Walking was such a pleasant activity and basically most times it was better to walk since public transport is so expensive and slow at times.

Anyway, I think she's just suffering from the anxiety of being in a new place. She'll adapt to the place soon enough and she'll find that she'll never want to leave!

I guess when I went last year I was lucky that I already had my uncle's family there to h