A dinner conversation with some girlfriends the other day somehow spiralled into a sharing session of tragic personal love stories and led to the conclusion that every woman (OK, almost every woman) has a Mr Big in her life. For those who don't know, I'm referring to Carrie Bradshaw's Mr Big in Sex and the City.
So the Mr Big in a woman's life is the guy who has this mysterious hold on you. He hurts you time and time again; you hate him yet love him at the same time. He leaves you and you go on with your own life. Yet if he ever said he wanted to be with you or asked you to go back to him, you'd drop everything and be by his side in a split second. Your mind and heart know no logic when it comes to any matters that pertain to him – no matter what happens, there's always a corner in your heart that loves him even though he's the person who has made you shed the most tears and inflicted the most pain and heartache. You try to forget, but thoughts of him still haunt you like a ghost from the past. You know you shouldn't love, but you still do anyway.
Can you ever forget the past? And if you could, would you want to? Would you want to have the situation like what was depicted in The Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind? That is, have your memories completely erased? It would probably be less painful but would that make you a blander person? Or a less matured person?
Sara Bareilles' Gravity best epitomises the Mr Big situation.
Gravity
Something always brings me back to you.
It never takes too long.
No matter what I say or do
I’ll still feel you here ’til the moment I’m gone.
You hold me without touch.
You keep me without chains.
I never wanted anything so much
than to drown in your love and not feel your rain.
Set me free, leave me be.
I don’t want to fall another moment into your gravity.
Here I am and I stand so tall, just the way I’m supposed to be.
But you’re on to me and all over me.
You loved me ’cause I’m fragile.
When I thought that I was strong.
But you touch me for a little while
and all my fragile strength is gone.
Set me free, leave me be.
I don’t want to fall another moment into your gravity.
Here I am and I stand so tall,
just the way I’m supposed to be.
But you’re on to me and all over me.
I live here on my knees as I try to make you see that you’re
everything I think I need here on the ground.
But you’re neither friend nor foe though I can’t seem to let you go.
The one thing that I still know is that you’re keeping me down.
You’re on to me, you’re on to me and all over…
Something always brings me back to you….
It never takes too long.