I was going to post a blog entry about small talk when an aptly timed column appears in today's issue of Life! on the same subject matter.
The columnist today writes about how difficult she finds making small talk and how she's constantly amazed at how some people seem to excel in it. I find myself facing the same situation every time I'm with a huge group of people at a party or some other social function.
I marvel at how some of my friends can work the room so easily. I observe them and others and am impressed by the way they talk to each other as if they have known each other for the longest time. I so cannot do it. I'm like some wallflower in all these social functions. I just like to stick with a familiar group of people and not bother with anything else. Which of course doesn't do much for my networking skills to say the least.
But really, being in these big social functions and parties scare the hell outta me. I think I'm just socially inept. While I don't think I'm the pits when it comes to making small talk, I'm not the kinda person who's the life of the party either. I think I usually do better in small group situations. I'm not unfriendly. It's just that those social events where small talk prevails intimidate me.
Ah well, at least I know I'm not alone!
Posted by DSD at February 28, 2005 9:02 AMYeah I know what you mean. I am a wallflower as well. I have never even been to the tea room for the last 5 years at uni. Call me anti-social.
Posted by: Felix Cheung at February 28, 2005 6:50 PMYeah dsd! I know perfectly well what you mean. I find it really tiring making small-talk, ransacking your brain for anything, ANYTHING to talk about. It's even worse when the other party makes little effort contributing conversation starters. I once told a friend that I would really rather be alone, enjoying my own company, than be a social butterfly and have to meet new people and make small-talk all the time. Have you ever noticed how silence is so incredibly deafening and awkward when you're trying to make small-talk, but it's only with close friends that silence is so comfortable, natural and relaxed, and not just dead air?
Posted by: Dawn at February 28, 2005 7:39 PMFelix: Yeah, we should form a Wallflower club.
Dawn: Hi again! Yes, it's terrible when the other party makes little effort or is somewhat patronising. Totally agree with the silence part!
Posted by: dsd at March 1, 2005 8:38 AM